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[live_two_dance]

you know after you hear that tradgic story about some tormented teen in dallas, texas & you sit there & you think to yourself "that could nevver happen to me" ?  yeah, well, i just wish that worked in every situation for every person.....

so this is my journal, & im going to use it like i always have; as an electronic ventilating system for me.....

Comments

hey twisty straw<3

[anonymous]

i know wat et is that you are speaking about, and i know it is very very hard. I wish more than anything that i could take u away from it all to some place where this kind of thing wouldn't happen, and you wouldn't have to deal with it. But something like that isn't possible. You don't need me to do that anyways. Your a very strong person and i know for sure that you are going to get through this. Even if you don't know yourself, i'm sure you will because i know you, and i know that you are strong enough to deal with this. Really you don't need me at all to get through this. But maybe in some way i could help u feel just a little bit better, or in some way make it easier. So if u ever ever ever need anything ever, please don't hesitates to ask me. Wether it's a nuclear bomb, or coco and a movie, or just to talk, just let me know and i will make it happen. There is nothing i can tell u to make things better. I really wish there was, i try to think of something all the time. But honestly i have no idea wat it's like and there is no way i could understand it. All i know is, 1. nothing, and i mean nothing is your fault. Every bit of it is (named person's) fault, and if u ever have a drop of guilt u must call me so i can get black women to slap u silly, cause girl u aint done nothin wrong aight, that i am sure of, the other thing i can tell u is, 2. there is a light at the end of the tunnel, i haven't experienced wat u have, but i have seen it sooooo many times everywhere in my life, it is horrible and messy and the worse thing i can think of, but when u over come it, u will have such a huge edge in life. It's such a horrible thing, that the only thing u can do is learn from it, and keep the experience in the back of ur mind. It will give u compassion for others and u'll understand things that lots of people won't understand. You can take it with u, and use it to make sure that you don't make the same mistakes, like my momsey did.

I know that these things in ur life are truly hell, and u must worry and think about things i can't even imagine, things no one should have to worry about, not to mention a teenager in highschool who has enough drama and problems. But i want u to know that many people love you sooo much. You don't realize the impact u have on people and their lives. When you talk to ur friends about these things and to me, not for a second do any of us ever want u to stop. We are here for you and want u to tell us wat ever u need and ask of to do anything for you. Because we love you and know you would go crazy trying to help us if this were happening to us. And your not some drama queen on mtv complaining that daddy only got them 3 horses. You are a wonderful positive person, that makes so many people's lives wonderful, and your going through hell. And i don't know how ur gal friends feel about it. I know they love you too death, especially jacci, and i am quite sure they love talking to u about it and trying to help you. I do know for sure how i feel about it. I love you more than anything that has ever existed, and all i want to do is listen to u and help you. Your problems are my problems and please never for a second feel like u shouldn't talk to me or ask me for help because ur worried i won't want to. I want more than anything to help you, and i don't care wat it takes, and i know ur fab 5 feels the same. So please, just ask<3<3

and yes harry friday, yes yes u should wear ur tom felton shirt, but i hope u realize i'm going to wear a hot little potatoe on my shirt!!, ashton kutcher is goign to be smiling at u the whole time