In need of a laugh?
Two years ago one of my sisters sent this email out to myself, our mother, and our other sisters. I printed it off and read it when I need a good laugh. I thought some of you might want a good laugh occasionally too, so I am sharing it with you. It's a true story, which only makes it funnier. I'm really sad she didn't include pictures.
I hope this little story brings you some enjoyment.
Hi everyone,
I know I’ve been complaining about work a lot lately, so I thought I would change the subject and complain about something different. Trying to be frugal with my money.
Due to the nice summer we’ve had, the weeds around our carport have shot up to incredible heights. With some almost up to my waist, slogging through them was beginning to feel like a jungle expedition. So Saturday, while I was at the bridal shower, the landlord decided to take it upon himself and weedwack them. Quite nice of him, I know. Because I was riding with Mom and S, I left my car at home. Still all sounds fine, right? Wrong. Did you know that when someone weedwacks, small bits of pulverized weeds go flying everywhere? And because they are covered in plant juices, they then stick as though glued wherever they land? I went out to my car Saturday night to go to Anchorage and my first thought was that it had been vandalized. The entire car was covered in weed shavings: the top, the sides, even the windshield. I don’t mean tiny particles decorating my car. I mean my car looked as though someone had dumped a bag of lawn mower shavings on it.
I was running late, so I decided not to take it through the car wash. I figured taking it out on the highway would blow some of them off. I underestimated how sticky plant juice is. Not a single shaving moved. As always, I was busy in Anchorage and was able to put the situation out of my mind, as the car sat parked in Mom’s driveway, the weed bits baking on in the sun. It did become a bit embarrassing on Monday, as I could only imagine what my coworkers thought of the car covered in lawn mover shavings. Monday evening, I decided it was time to get it washed. I was tired of being embarrassed about it. But, at the same time, I decided to be frugal about it. Not wanting to spend $13 on a wash that might not get off the glued on mess, I opted to take it to one of the do it yourself wash bays. Then I could be sure to give it a good scrubbing.
So, I get to the wash bay and trade my $5 bill in for quarters. You have to deposit $2.25 to get the machine started. When did it go up so much? I thought it used to be $0.50. Anyways, I deposit my quarters and turn the dial to “Pre-Rinse”. I start spraying my car, complimenting myself on my frugality and good sense, when all of a sudden the spray stops. Instead, a little bit of foam dribbles out of the nozzle. I try everything I can think of, changing the dial, squeezing the nozzle harder, yelling at the machine. Nothing works. So I start waving the nozzle around, having decided that if I wave it hard enough, little bits of moisture will get over most of my car, providing an adequate “pre-rinse”. Just FYI, it doesn’t. I’ve also now realized that my $2.25 will only get me 2 minutes of wash time, all but 15 seconds of which I’ve used. I dive over the car to throw in some more coins before it runs out and I have to start my time over. Having had enough with the pre-rinse, I decide I should just move on to the foaming scrubber brush. I stick in the rest of my coins and get to work scrubbing my car with the brush. It, as opposed to the sprayer, really works. It’s producing copious amounts of foam as I scrub away. It does a great job and I’m really kinda enjoying it. In fact, I’m enjoying it too much and I only realized when there are a few seconds left, that I’m about to run out of time. I frantically scrub away at the back of the car, then throw the brush back on the hooks as I race around the car to throw another quarter in. The buzzer goes off right as I’m rounding the corner of the car. Drat. Now I have to stick in another $2.25 to get it started again and rinse the foam off. Having used up all the quarters from my $5, I open my wallet and look inside. All I have is a $10. Now I’m certainly not going to change my entire $10 into quarters just so I can get the machine running long enough to rinse the foam off my car. Instead, I start digging through my coin pocket and into my ashtray looking for quarters. I’m pulling them out of both, not worried at all, because there seems to be quite a few. I get as many as I can find, count them, and discover I have 8. Now remember, I need 9 to equal my $2.25 to get the machine running again. I’m starting to panic a little now as I begin pulling mats out of my car, sticking my head under seats, and emptying the center console looking for a stray quarter. All I find is a lousy dime. So, my quandary is as such: My car is currently covered in copious amounts of foam. I am short one quarter to get the machine started again. And I just can’t find it in myself to break and entire $10 bill just to get one stinking quarter. I attempt resourcefulness and pull out a wad of Kleenex and start trying to wipe the foam off. Doesn’t work.
So, with all the dignity I can muster, I get into my foam-covered car and begin driving down the street back home. As I see people craning their necks to look at my car, I come up with the logical reasons I hope they might be thinking. “Maybe she just got married and someone covered her car in shaving cream.” “Maybe she’s a doctor and was in the middle of getting her car washing by a group raising money when she was called away on a emergency.” “Maybe the street flooded over there and a truck carrying soap overturned in it, creating lots of foam, and she just drove through it.” Now obviously, I could take my car through another car wash, but seeing how I just spent $5 covering my car in foam, I just can’t bring myself to do that. It galls me too much. So I just go home, praying that there might be rain overnight. No luck. In the morning I go out to my car to see how it looks. The foam has melted down and is now just congealed goo all over the car. You might think this makes it look better, right? Well, yeah, a little. However, apparently the foam is sweet smelling. Now covering my car, stuck in the goo, are hundreds of bugs attracted y the smell but who got caught in the stickiness. This just keeps getting better. And a note to everyone for future reference: if your windshield is covered in congealed soap, using your washer spray will not help, it will cause the soap to foam back up. Just so you know. I’m not sure which was worse, going to work with a grass covered car, or going to work with a goo and bug covered car. Either way, I’m sure my coworkers think I am absolutely nuts by now.
This story does have a happy ending because yesterday afternoon it started raining a little and washed all the bugs off. I now just have soap streaks running down my car. If we don’t get more rain today, I might have to suck it up and pay to just take my car through a real wash. Which yes, I realize would have been cheaper to do in the first place now. So much for frugality.
Love,
R
I hope this little story brings you some enjoyment.
Hi everyone,
I know I’ve been complaining about work a lot lately, so I thought I would change the subject and complain about something different. Trying to be frugal with my money.
Due to the nice summer we’ve had, the weeds around our carport have shot up to incredible heights. With some almost up to my waist, slogging through them was beginning to feel like a jungle expedition. So Saturday, while I was at the bridal shower, the landlord decided to take it upon himself and weedwack them. Quite nice of him, I know. Because I was riding with Mom and S, I left my car at home. Still all sounds fine, right? Wrong. Did you know that when someone weedwacks, small bits of pulverized weeds go flying everywhere? And because they are covered in plant juices, they then stick as though glued wherever they land? I went out to my car Saturday night to go to Anchorage and my first thought was that it had been vandalized. The entire car was covered in weed shavings: the top, the sides, even the windshield. I don’t mean tiny particles decorating my car. I mean my car looked as though someone had dumped a bag of lawn mower shavings on it.
I was running late, so I decided not to take it through the car wash. I figured taking it out on the highway would blow some of them off. I underestimated how sticky plant juice is. Not a single shaving moved. As always, I was busy in Anchorage and was able to put the situation out of my mind, as the car sat parked in Mom’s driveway, the weed bits baking on in the sun. It did become a bit embarrassing on Monday, as I could only imagine what my coworkers thought of the car covered in lawn mover shavings. Monday evening, I decided it was time to get it washed. I was tired of being embarrassed about it. But, at the same time, I decided to be frugal about it. Not wanting to spend $13 on a wash that might not get off the glued on mess, I opted to take it to one of the do it yourself wash bays. Then I could be sure to give it a good scrubbing.
So, I get to the wash bay and trade my $5 bill in for quarters. You have to deposit $2.25 to get the machine started. When did it go up so much? I thought it used to be $0.50. Anyways, I deposit my quarters and turn the dial to “Pre-Rinse”. I start spraying my car, complimenting myself on my frugality and good sense, when all of a sudden the spray stops. Instead, a little bit of foam dribbles out of the nozzle. I try everything I can think of, changing the dial, squeezing the nozzle harder, yelling at the machine. Nothing works. So I start waving the nozzle around, having decided that if I wave it hard enough, little bits of moisture will get over most of my car, providing an adequate “pre-rinse”. Just FYI, it doesn’t. I’ve also now realized that my $2.25 will only get me 2 minutes of wash time, all but 15 seconds of which I’ve used. I dive over the car to throw in some more coins before it runs out and I have to start my time over. Having had enough with the pre-rinse, I decide I should just move on to the foaming scrubber brush. I stick in the rest of my coins and get to work scrubbing my car with the brush. It, as opposed to the sprayer, really works. It’s producing copious amounts of foam as I scrub away. It does a great job and I’m really kinda enjoying it. In fact, I’m enjoying it too much and I only realized when there are a few seconds left, that I’m about to run out of time. I frantically scrub away at the back of the car, then throw the brush back on the hooks as I race around the car to throw another quarter in. The buzzer goes off right as I’m rounding the corner of the car. Drat. Now I have to stick in another $2.25 to get it started again and rinse the foam off. Having used up all the quarters from my $5, I open my wallet and look inside. All I have is a $10. Now I’m certainly not going to change my entire $10 into quarters just so I can get the machine running long enough to rinse the foam off my car. Instead, I start digging through my coin pocket and into my ashtray looking for quarters. I’m pulling them out of both, not worried at all, because there seems to be quite a few. I get as many as I can find, count them, and discover I have 8. Now remember, I need 9 to equal my $2.25 to get the machine running again. I’m starting to panic a little now as I begin pulling mats out of my car, sticking my head under seats, and emptying the center console looking for a stray quarter. All I find is a lousy dime. So, my quandary is as such: My car is currently covered in copious amounts of foam. I am short one quarter to get the machine started again. And I just can’t find it in myself to break and entire $10 bill just to get one stinking quarter. I attempt resourcefulness and pull out a wad of Kleenex and start trying to wipe the foam off. Doesn’t work.
So, with all the dignity I can muster, I get into my foam-covered car and begin driving down the street back home. As I see people craning their necks to look at my car, I come up with the logical reasons I hope they might be thinking. “Maybe she just got married and someone covered her car in shaving cream.” “Maybe she’s a doctor and was in the middle of getting her car washing by a group raising money when she was called away on a emergency.” “Maybe the street flooded over there and a truck carrying soap overturned in it, creating lots of foam, and she just drove through it.” Now obviously, I could take my car through another car wash, but seeing how I just spent $5 covering my car in foam, I just can’t bring myself to do that. It galls me too much. So I just go home, praying that there might be rain overnight. No luck. In the morning I go out to my car to see how it looks. The foam has melted down and is now just congealed goo all over the car. You might think this makes it look better, right? Well, yeah, a little. However, apparently the foam is sweet smelling. Now covering my car, stuck in the goo, are hundreds of bugs attracted y the smell but who got caught in the stickiness. This just keeps getting better. And a note to everyone for future reference: if your windshield is covered in congealed soap, using your washer spray will not help, it will cause the soap to foam back up. Just so you know. I’m not sure which was worse, going to work with a grass covered car, or going to work with a goo and bug covered car. Either way, I’m sure my coworkers think I am absolutely nuts by now.
This story does have a happy ending because yesterday afternoon it started raining a little and washed all the bugs off. I now just have soap streaks running down my car. If we don’t get more rain today, I might have to suck it up and pay to just take my car through a real wash. Which yes, I realize would have been cheaper to do in the first place now. So much for frugality.
Love,
R