A New Beginning!!!
Right ... here we go ... I am actually going to make an effort to keep this journal going this year! I actually think it will be helpful for me to get things off my chest into here ... use it as a platform for my ranting! haha! uch well may as well make an effort...
I'm doing nothing very productive this year due to failing a resit exam and therefore wasting this year doing ONE class in uni :( grrr! This involves me only being in uni of a Thursday and Friday morning, so I've taken on as many extra days at the GC as I can. Woo excitement :S haha!
Apart from that life is pretty boring. I keep ending up doing loads of things to help out when I have a day off, mostly involving one Gran or the other! I recently found myself chucking a bin bag full of out of date biscuits from my Gran's the other day, I had decided I was going to clear out her kitchen cupboards and I'm glad I did or I'd be eating tea biscuits from last year! And not to mention the out of date heat rub she had been using (dated 2006!) and the Vix that was dated 1994!!!!! Bloody hell haha what a woman! :D Never mind though cause if I last that long with all my faculties still intact I will be well chuffed!
Otherwise I'm finding myself quite lonely these days :( I miss having my mates about in uni cause they are all away on placement to far flung corners of the country! Sarah and Chloe are in Leeds, Jen in Edinburgh. Pip and Alan in Inverness, Ross is somewhere in North Wales! I just feel strange being in Glasgow all the time without someone to jump on for a coffee or just banter... its the banter I miss most ... and my Sarah :( Its even harder cause Nick is in Barcalona and having a whale of a time and unlikely to be coming home for good. I do see Luczi alot more now though, so i suppose there is a silver lining to everything, I text her everyday I'm in uni just because I'm becoming a wee loner lol! Her pharmacy crew have "adopted" me like a wee lost puppy *eyeroll* I mean they are lovely people, don't get me wrong but seriously they are all so up themselves that I feel so inferior to them sometimes when I meet up with them! All of them are from well off families (not that I'm not but i don't flaunt it the way they do or act it like they do) and they are all rather "it girls" and my denim skirt/red tights/high top vans combo was rather commented on in a "completely sincere" way!
I don't even know why this annoys me so much?? I think its just cause that since I came back from Cambodia everything has been shit! From finding out I had had a really shitty year in uni and the amount of resits I had to do and extra coursework I had to hand in (of which my parents know about half off) and the disapointment of not passing fucking mechanics of all damned things!!! And therefore not being able to go on placement with everyone else and get out of the family house and into my own place finally. Everything has just piled up one on top of the other, and I want to just scream and tell everyone to fuck off and leave me alone! I don't even know why I'm so angry now! I was always the ever optomist and seeing the good in every situation and helping everyone around me without batting an eyelid but now I want to tell the world to fuck off and leave me alone! The only fun I've had recently is walking in the rain with Millie ... thats the most uplifting experience I've had recently and I feel like a mad woman running in the rain with the dog but its rather clensing or something :S dont' know but it makes me grin like a nutter and its been raining so much recently I've been doing it regularly! lol! oh well! :S
Anyway ... I'm not even finished ranting yet, not even touched the subject of my darling brother! But I need to get up at half 6 tomoz in order to get to uni on time and I am not a morning person!
xXx