Sad eve of Thanksgiving
Normally, sometime around thanksgiving, I make a post telling everyone what I am thankful for. This year I will do the same, but it's got a bittersweet edge to it.
The first thing on my list that I am grateful for is something I actually haven't yet announced. It's officially exclusive between James and I, and I'm very happy. Right now it feels very surreal. It is nice to be in a relationship again, and so far, it has been very good to be with James specifically. However, I'm much more wary of men than I've ever been in the past, and so I'm keeping my guard up a little more. I'm thankful to be given a chance to have someone again. Let's just hope it continues to be something to be grateful for, instead of something I'd be grateful to get away from.
The second thing I am grateful for this year is taking a stand. This year showcased me walking away from a lot of people and situations that were no good for me. As a result, I've been able to walk toward some people and situations that either are or have the distinct potential to be better for me.
The third thing I am grateful for is the ability to write my novel as a part of NaNoWriMo. As a result, I've met some cool people, learned a lot, both about myself and about writing, and found that really, just like everyone else, I'm doing the best that I possibly can at this time in my life. I never realized before that all of life is struggle. I'm really glad to have had the time to write. It's given me perspective.
Now. I saved the sadder note for this post for last, mostly because it's the most important thing and I wanted to make sure to have my mind be free of other thoughts before I talked about this. In other words, last is certainly not least...
new_birth died last night. She and I did not have an extraordinarily close relationship, but I remember her fondly -- we often talked about dating, as that was one thing we had in common. She consoled me when I was down after I broke up with John and encouraged me to get back into the dating scene and not take any crap. She was a wonderful poet, and as I understand it, a wonderful mom as well. She's not been well for a few months now, and while I was obviously hoping for a different ending, this is the one we all got instead. While I'm sad and troubled that she's gone, I will be eternally thankful that I got to know her, even just a little bit, in the time that we had. I remember that last year, the day after Thanksgiving, in fact, I IM'd her and while our conversation was short, it was very positive. Leslie, wherever you are -- wherever that is... I will think of you often and hope you are happy.
The first thing on my list that I am grateful for is something I actually haven't yet announced. It's officially exclusive between James and I, and I'm very happy. Right now it feels very surreal. It is nice to be in a relationship again, and so far, it has been very good to be with James specifically. However, I'm much more wary of men than I've ever been in the past, and so I'm keeping my guard up a little more. I'm thankful to be given a chance to have someone again. Let's just hope it continues to be something to be grateful for, instead of something I'd be grateful to get away from.
The second thing I am grateful for this year is taking a stand. This year showcased me walking away from a lot of people and situations that were no good for me. As a result, I've been able to walk toward some people and situations that either are or have the distinct potential to be better for me.
The third thing I am grateful for is the ability to write my novel as a part of NaNoWriMo. As a result, I've met some cool people, learned a lot, both about myself and about writing, and found that really, just like everyone else, I'm doing the best that I possibly can at this time in my life. I never realized before that all of life is struggle. I'm really glad to have had the time to write. It's given me perspective.
Now. I saved the sadder note for this post for last, mostly because it's the most important thing and I wanted to make sure to have my mind be free of other thoughts before I talked about this. In other words, last is certainly not least...
new_birth died last night. She and I did not have an extraordinarily close relationship, but I remember her fondly -- we often talked about dating, as that was one thing we had in common. She consoled me when I was down after I broke up with John and encouraged me to get back into the dating scene and not take any crap. She was a wonderful poet, and as I understand it, a wonderful mom as well. She's not been well for a few months now, and while I was obviously hoping for a different ending, this is the one we all got instead. While I'm sad and troubled that she's gone, I will be eternally thankful that I got to know her, even just a little bit, in the time that we had. I remember that last year, the day after Thanksgiving, in fact, I IM'd her and while our conversation was short, it was very positive. Leslie, wherever you are -- wherever that is... I will think of you often and hope you are happy.