take a picture, sweetie! I ain't got time to waste!
I HAD SUCH A FUCKING AWESOME NEW YEAR. And seriously, it always baffles me how OKAY - the social events and outings that I think will suck, are always the most awesome of all, and the outings that I am so pumped for always end up falling through and being lame.
ANYWAY. CJ came and got me a little after 7, we went to Target to get him an iPod adapter for his stereo and he was freaking out that there were only two cords and not three and I was like, "Well yeah, do you NEED the yellow video one? That's for video, you dumbass." And he started laughing because I was right and he was so stupid. He stopped at the liquor store and I had to wait in the car because as GEMMA AND I FOUND OUT, if you go in with someone who is of age, you get carded too and if you're too young, the other person can't even buy it. LAME. So I always have to wait in the car now when my friend buy booze. He comes back with a random slice of pizza, LOL, "want this?" Yes. He's just all fucking friends with everyone and the workers had pizza so he got some. And this is so stupid but it was so cute to me, I had gum and then when he handed me my pizza, he held out his hand and said, "Gum." and let me spit it in his hand so he could throw it out. Just... that stuff.
We went back to his house and he sat me down and brought up the other morning. "Remember when I said I wanted to reflect and you were giving me shit about that?" So we talked about it and oh, he starts puttering around his desk and won't let me see what he's doing. He turns around and hands me a check to help pay for my speeding ticket. "If you want to go to court and fight this, I will go with you. Otherwise - and I know you said you didn't want help so I'm giving you the choice - you just hold onto that and do whatever you want with it, cash it, don't cash it, up to you." ACE. Ace move.
I heard his mom, "Is Alyssa here??" Yes I'm here! She wanted to come and say hi. "You look very nice, by the way," she said when I was playing with the dog and that made me happeh. His sister came in and asked my opinion on her outfit. ♥ "Are the fishnets too slutty?" ksl;daf. ilfishnets. She was all freaked out about going to her party, she didn't really know anyone and it just sounded like it'd be sketchy as fuck. So we were going to go with her, make sure she got in without being raped or stabbed, and then leave if it was lame. CJ asked if we could go to his friend Justin's house. I said, "Well to be honest, I'm kind of upset that I blew off all of MY friends tonight to just go sit and hang out with yours." He told me he understood and we didn't even have to stay there, he just wanted me to meet him because he's like his best friend. So I said that was fine.
YOU GUYS. OKAY. SO WE'RE DRIVING TO JUSTIN'S AND I KNOW THAT ONE OF MY OLD HALF-FLINGS, JIMMY, LIVES IN THIS NEIGHBORHOOD. And I'm looking for his house, and then I see one that I recognize and I knew it had to be it but I wasn't 100% sure, you know? CJ PULLS INTO THAT HOUSE'S DRIVEWAY. I say, "Um, what is Justin's last name?" He says, "[insert last name]" And I SCREAM and DIE on his passenger seat. "DOES HE HAVE A BROTHER NAMED JIMMY." And he says yes and I freaked the fuck out, "OHMYGODOHMYGOD NO. IS HE HERE. I DO NOT EVEN BELIEVE THIS RIGHT NOW." He was like, "What?! TELL ME, WHAT IS GOING ON I AM SO CONFUSED." I just... I can't even believe how small the world is. And it was so weird being in that house again! All of it! So weird! And no Jimmy was not there, thank GOD.
We were supposed to meet his sister, Steph, at 10:15 to drive to the party but we lost track of time and didn't even look at the clock until it was 10:20. Oh, no. We followed her downtown and GOD WORDS CANNOT EXPRESS HOW MUCH I LOVE THE CITY HERE. It calms the fuck out of me, I feel it happen when I first come around that bend and see all of the buildings. And it's so glorious at night. I was just so content being among it all. We parked and walked for fucking EVER in the snow and cold and I was freezing. But I was in the city! And it was so alive, there were so many people out on the street and awake.
We found the guy Derek who invited us, and he directed us on how to get there. IT WAS SO COOL, we had to walk up these stairs on the outside of a building (IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CITY DON'T FORGET, I WAS DYING) up like 4 floors, and there were people outside hanging out along the stairs and in doorways on the way up and it was just one fucking big party. I was scared of it getting busted or being dangerous but god it was so thrilling and I could tell before I even got in there that it'd be right up my alley. There was just a feeling in the air and it was so exciting. We got to where we were supposed to be and some srs bsns man opened the door for us. There was a $10 cover and the guy had to mark our hands and IT WAS SO FUCKING COOL, YOU GUYS, I CANNOT EVEN EXPLAIN.
I felt so much of New York in the 80's. These people, they felt like misfit toys, I completely understood what that means. I'm sure it was completely amplified in NY but I feel like I got a true glimpse of what that actually fucking felt like. It was this... IDK what to call it, loft? penthouse? apartment thing? It was all concrete and cement and there were fun sheets and shit hanging from the ceiling, there weren't any lights on but you could still see, it was slightly hazy with smoke and there was this loud ass techno with amazing bass just booming everywhere. They had a little dance floor area, with monitors that were showing trippy shapes and the PEOPLE THERE. WERE SO AMAZINGLY INTERESTING. Just their clothes and their hair and god it's like I didn't even know that this shit actually happened places. I remember watching this girl on the dance floor, she had these little pigtails in and was dancing and I thought that for the first time in my life, I was caught up to my age. I've always felt so behind everyone, but here I felt like a 20 year old. I felt young and alive and unstoppable. I felt my life ahead of me, but I felt complete contentment. It was like yes. I felt old enough in my youth (I swear to god that makes sense) and it was gorgeous and these people, I loved them, everyone was so comfortable with who they were. They were dressed so uniquely and so fun and they weren't afraid to dance and there were glowsticks and fun drinks and lights but it wasn't even like a club, idk how to explain this. I felt safe and okay there, whereas I don't at clubs. It was just this cute little underground powerhouse.
AND THE BATHROOM. IT WAS SO ASDKLJFHAHJ WEIRD BUT I LOVED IT. IT WAS SO SKETCH. LIKE, THE LIGHT WAS RED AND THERE WAS WRITING ON THE WALL AND SOME BODYGUARD GUARDING THE DOOR WHEN YOU WERE IN IT AND SLKDJFHAS IDEK IDEK BUT I LOVED IT SO FUCKING MUCH.
And I had so much fun! CJ, we need to work on his dancing a little but for the most part I had fun and just didn't care about anything. And it was so cute, he was like, "Hey guess what?" and I was like, "What?" and he kissed me. And I got my first New Years kiss ever, I've never been kissed at midnight before and I've always wanted that. Oh oh they had a fun countdown clock up on the wall and lights everywhere and the drink bar said something like "Future time" painted on it AND I WISH I COULD DESCRIBE THIS BETTER. It was amazing, it reminded me of Halloween and New York and Rocky Horror and a dream all combined.
The first song I heard of 2009 was "Erotic City" by Prince. I fucking freaked, I damn near screamed because I love that song so much. AND THEN. We went to go get another drink and Super Freak started playing. OH MY GOD SO MUCH FUN. Before midnight, they'd just been playing lyric-less techno and now they were busting out all of this ace 80's shit. AND WAIT FOR IT - they played a Michael Jackson song after that and then AFTER THAT THEY PLAYED "BABY I'M A STAR". ALSO BY PRINCE. OH MY GOD I HAD SO MUCH FUN, SINGING IN HIS FACE AND DANCING WITH HIM AND JUST GOD I LOVE SONGS THAT I KNOW REALLY WELL BECAUSE I CAN LIKE, CHOREOGRAPH LITTLE THINGS AHEAD OF TIME AND IT IS JUST SO MUCH FUCKING FUN FOR ME.
Two guys got up on the DJ table and started spraying champagne on everyone. There was this girl prancing around with like, nun chucks made of light sticks, she told us her name was Caitlin Rose, and I wish I would have gotten pictures of these people but I didn't want to be a freak. I just... I was so in my fucking element, I've never had such a fun and unique New Years before. I just remember feeling so alive and young. I've never been in a place where people like this actually existed and this was normal and it felt like such a good fit. I wish I wouldn't have had my bag or my coat so I could have let loose.
They had a hookah bar! SO MUCH FUN! and LOL you guys, I had told him I've been wanting pictures of smoke so I can make Photoshop brushes. And then he made his sister take a hit and said, "Steph, get a good one so she can get pictures for her art." ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ That made me so fucking happy. Everyone there was so nice, too. CJ got up for some reason and the guy who was next to him started talking to me, he introduced himself and was so so friendly! He later brought up shotgunning. And if you don't know, that's where someone takes a hit of something and then kisses someone else and blows it into their mouth and you both get high (it is really fucking sexy, actually). So, I don't know if that was his way of trying to hit on me or what but it was quite obvious that I was with CJ, so. Or maybe he wanted me to shotgun Steph, I don't know.
CJ came back and started feeding me grapes! And chocolate! And then he was running this really hot rock on my legs and I was like, wtf is this and he was like, "It's a heat stone!" LOL LIKE WHAT THE FUCK, WHERE DO YOU GET THIS SHIT. IT AMUSED ME SO MUCH. And then this girl came to us with a shit ton of glowing bracelets and was like, "WANT SOME LIGHT STICKS?!" AND WE WERE LIKE, "OH MY GOD YES, YES."
It was so perfect and different, GOD I CAN'T EVEN. I don't even know what I expect you to say to this entry, I just really needed to write about it all. Seriously it felt like the kind of shit you only see in films, even just going up those fucking metal stairs. I had a moment where I stopped and said it felt like a movie. I expected to wake up or something. We went back to his house around three, I think, and we still had our glowsticks on and ksljdfhkjlsdf jkslahf kjlashfjklahsdfakjshf. ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ (IT IS OKAY, YOU GUYS, OUR PANTS STAYED ON. So don't go getting any ideas.) We fell asleep at like 8 or something, I don't know, dude, I was so tired and then I heard him say, "It's 11:43" so I was like, "OH MY GOD." So then we decided to, you know, get back to real life. He got up and took a shower but I didn't really notice because I was half asleep still and he came back to bed and I was like, "... did you just take a shower?" and he was like, "Yes. DAMN, did I ruin it, did you want to take one too? LOL." LMAO NO I DID NOT, DREAM ON, KID. I WAS JUST ASKING. And then I got up for reals and came home and slept MOAR but oh my GOD I am fucking loving 2009 so far!!! I hope you all had a fantastic New Year!!
ANYWAY. CJ came and got me a little after 7, we went to Target to get him an iPod adapter for his stereo and he was freaking out that there were only two cords and not three and I was like, "Well yeah, do you NEED the yellow video one? That's for video, you dumbass." And he started laughing because I was right and he was so stupid. He stopped at the liquor store and I had to wait in the car because as GEMMA AND I FOUND OUT, if you go in with someone who is of age, you get carded too and if you're too young, the other person can't even buy it. LAME. So I always have to wait in the car now when my friend buy booze. He comes back with a random slice of pizza, LOL, "want this?" Yes. He's just all fucking friends with everyone and the workers had pizza so he got some. And this is so stupid but it was so cute to me, I had gum and then when he handed me my pizza, he held out his hand and said, "Gum." and let me spit it in his hand so he could throw it out. Just... that stuff.
We went back to his house and he sat me down and brought up the other morning. "Remember when I said I wanted to reflect and you were giving me shit about that?" So we talked about it and oh, he starts puttering around his desk and won't let me see what he's doing. He turns around and hands me a check to help pay for my speeding ticket. "If you want to go to court and fight this, I will go with you. Otherwise - and I know you said you didn't want help so I'm giving you the choice - you just hold onto that and do whatever you want with it, cash it, don't cash it, up to you." ACE. Ace move.
I heard his mom, "Is Alyssa here??" Yes I'm here! She wanted to come and say hi. "You look very nice, by the way," she said when I was playing with the dog and that made me happeh. His sister came in and asked my opinion on her outfit. ♥ "Are the fishnets too slutty?" ksl;daf. ilfishnets. She was all freaked out about going to her party, she didn't really know anyone and it just sounded like it'd be sketchy as fuck. So we were going to go with her, make sure she got in without being raped or stabbed, and then leave if it was lame. CJ asked if we could go to his friend Justin's house. I said, "Well to be honest, I'm kind of upset that I blew off all of MY friends tonight to just go sit and hang out with yours." He told me he understood and we didn't even have to stay there, he just wanted me to meet him because he's like his best friend. So I said that was fine.
YOU GUYS. OKAY. SO WE'RE DRIVING TO JUSTIN'S AND I KNOW THAT ONE OF MY OLD HALF-FLINGS, JIMMY, LIVES IN THIS NEIGHBORHOOD. And I'm looking for his house, and then I see one that I recognize and I knew it had to be it but I wasn't 100% sure, you know? CJ PULLS INTO THAT HOUSE'S DRIVEWAY. I say, "Um, what is Justin's last name?" He says, "[insert last name]" And I SCREAM and DIE on his passenger seat. "DOES HE HAVE A BROTHER NAMED JIMMY." And he says yes and I freaked the fuck out, "OHMYGODOHMYGOD NO. IS HE HERE. I DO NOT EVEN BELIEVE THIS RIGHT NOW." He was like, "What?! TELL ME, WHAT IS GOING ON I AM SO CONFUSED." I just... I can't even believe how small the world is. And it was so weird being in that house again! All of it! So weird! And no Jimmy was not there, thank GOD.
We were supposed to meet his sister, Steph, at 10:15 to drive to the party but we lost track of time and didn't even look at the clock until it was 10:20. Oh, no. We followed her downtown and GOD WORDS CANNOT EXPRESS HOW MUCH I LOVE THE CITY HERE. It calms the fuck out of me, I feel it happen when I first come around that bend and see all of the buildings. And it's so glorious at night. I was just so content being among it all. We parked and walked for fucking EVER in the snow and cold and I was freezing. But I was in the city! And it was so alive, there were so many people out on the street and awake.
We found the guy Derek who invited us, and he directed us on how to get there. IT WAS SO COOL, we had to walk up these stairs on the outside of a building (IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CITY DON'T FORGET, I WAS DYING) up like 4 floors, and there were people outside hanging out along the stairs and in doorways on the way up and it was just one fucking big party. I was scared of it getting busted or being dangerous but god it was so thrilling and I could tell before I even got in there that it'd be right up my alley. There was just a feeling in the air and it was so exciting. We got to where we were supposed to be and some srs bsns man opened the door for us. There was a $10 cover and the guy had to mark our hands and IT WAS SO FUCKING COOL, YOU GUYS, I CANNOT EVEN EXPLAIN.
I felt so much of New York in the 80's. These people, they felt like misfit toys, I completely understood what that means. I'm sure it was completely amplified in NY but I feel like I got a true glimpse of what that actually fucking felt like. It was this... IDK what to call it, loft? penthouse? apartment thing? It was all concrete and cement and there were fun sheets and shit hanging from the ceiling, there weren't any lights on but you could still see, it was slightly hazy with smoke and there was this loud ass techno with amazing bass just booming everywhere. They had a little dance floor area, with monitors that were showing trippy shapes and the PEOPLE THERE. WERE SO AMAZINGLY INTERESTING. Just their clothes and their hair and god it's like I didn't even know that this shit actually happened places. I remember watching this girl on the dance floor, she had these little pigtails in and was dancing and I thought that for the first time in my life, I was caught up to my age. I've always felt so behind everyone, but here I felt like a 20 year old. I felt young and alive and unstoppable. I felt my life ahead of me, but I felt complete contentment. It was like yes. I felt old enough in my youth (I swear to god that makes sense) and it was gorgeous and these people, I loved them, everyone was so comfortable with who they were. They were dressed so uniquely and so fun and they weren't afraid to dance and there were glowsticks and fun drinks and lights but it wasn't even like a club, idk how to explain this. I felt safe and okay there, whereas I don't at clubs. It was just this cute little underground powerhouse.
AND THE BATHROOM. IT WAS SO ASDKLJFHAHJ WEIRD BUT I LOVED IT. IT WAS SO SKETCH. LIKE, THE LIGHT WAS RED AND THERE WAS WRITING ON THE WALL AND SOME BODYGUARD GUARDING THE DOOR WHEN YOU WERE IN IT AND SLKDJFHAS IDEK IDEK BUT I LOVED IT SO FUCKING MUCH.
And I had so much fun! CJ, we need to work on his dancing a little but for the most part I had fun and just didn't care about anything. And it was so cute, he was like, "Hey guess what?" and I was like, "What?" and he kissed me. And I got my first New Years kiss ever, I've never been kissed at midnight before and I've always wanted that. Oh oh they had a fun countdown clock up on the wall and lights everywhere and the drink bar said something like "Future time" painted on it AND I WISH I COULD DESCRIBE THIS BETTER. It was amazing, it reminded me of Halloween and New York and Rocky Horror and a dream all combined.
The first song I heard of 2009 was "Erotic City" by Prince. I fucking freaked, I damn near screamed because I love that song so much. AND THEN. We went to go get another drink and Super Freak started playing. OH MY GOD SO MUCH FUN. Before midnight, they'd just been playing lyric-less techno and now they were busting out all of this ace 80's shit. AND WAIT FOR IT - they played a Michael Jackson song after that and then AFTER THAT THEY PLAYED "BABY I'M A STAR". ALSO BY PRINCE. OH MY GOD I HAD SO MUCH FUN, SINGING IN HIS FACE AND DANCING WITH HIM AND JUST GOD I LOVE SONGS THAT I KNOW REALLY WELL BECAUSE I CAN LIKE, CHOREOGRAPH LITTLE THINGS AHEAD OF TIME AND IT IS JUST SO MUCH FUCKING FUN FOR ME.
Two guys got up on the DJ table and started spraying champagne on everyone. There was this girl prancing around with like, nun chucks made of light sticks, she told us her name was Caitlin Rose, and I wish I would have gotten pictures of these people but I didn't want to be a freak. I just... I was so in my fucking element, I've never had such a fun and unique New Years before. I just remember feeling so alive and young. I've never been in a place where people like this actually existed and this was normal and it felt like such a good fit. I wish I wouldn't have had my bag or my coat so I could have let loose.
They had a hookah bar! SO MUCH FUN! and LOL you guys, I had told him I've been wanting pictures of smoke so I can make Photoshop brushes. And then he made his sister take a hit and said, "Steph, get a good one so she can get pictures for her art." ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ That made me so fucking happy. Everyone there was so nice, too. CJ got up for some reason and the guy who was next to him started talking to me, he introduced himself and was so so friendly! He later brought up shotgunning. And if you don't know, that's where someone takes a hit of something and then kisses someone else and blows it into their mouth and you both get high (it is really fucking sexy, actually). So, I don't know if that was his way of trying to hit on me or what but it was quite obvious that I was with CJ, so. Or maybe he wanted me to shotgun Steph, I don't know.
CJ came back and started feeding me grapes! And chocolate! And then he was running this really hot rock on my legs and I was like, wtf is this and he was like, "It's a heat stone!" LOL LIKE WHAT THE FUCK, WHERE DO YOU GET THIS SHIT. IT AMUSED ME SO MUCH. And then this girl came to us with a shit ton of glowing bracelets and was like, "WANT SOME LIGHT STICKS?!" AND WE WERE LIKE, "OH MY GOD YES, YES."
It was so perfect and different, GOD I CAN'T EVEN. I don't even know what I expect you to say to this entry, I just really needed to write about it all. Seriously it felt like the kind of shit you only see in films, even just going up those fucking metal stairs. I had a moment where I stopped and said it felt like a movie. I expected to wake up or something. We went back to his house around three, I think, and we still had our glowsticks on and ksljdfhkjlsdf jkslahf kjlashfjklahsdfakjshf. ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ (IT IS OKAY, YOU GUYS, OUR PANTS STAYED ON. So don't go getting any ideas.) We fell asleep at like 8 or something, I don't know, dude, I was so tired and then I heard him say, "It's 11:43" so I was like, "OH MY GOD." So then we decided to, you know, get back to real life. He got up and took a shower but I didn't really notice because I was half asleep still and he came back to bed and I was like, "... did you just take a shower?" and he was like, "Yes. DAMN, did I ruin it, did you want to take one too? LOL." LMAO NO I DID NOT, DREAM ON, KID. I WAS JUST ASKING. And then I got up for reals and came home and slept MOAR but oh my GOD I am fucking loving 2009 so far!!! I hope you all had a fantastic New Year!!