College college college
Well I'm going to try to stick to what I plan on doing, which is to update a lot more. My last entry didn't get any comments, so I'm pretty sure that everyone of my friends on here have either left or forgot about me. Meh, whatevs, I do this to keep track of my life and what I am thinking at the time.
So college is pretty blah. My class aren't really hard, but I discovered that it only takes one challenging class for me to get freaked out and panic. PS, Italian is a bullshit language and nobody should ever voluntarily try to take it. Other than that, most of my classes are either writing classes or theater tech ones. Something that I discovered about myself was that I am a terrible actor, but apparently I am a bitchin director. I'm going to stick with that, although I do want to take another acting class because I was going through some shit when I took 144.
So I went back and read through some of the journals of the actual people I know on here, and I have to say, I saw on Cheyanne's journal where she talked about going back and reading Jenn's and Scott's, and I honestly barely remember that whole thing. Is that bad? I mean, I literally do not remember jr.high school, or the beginning of high school. I don't really care because that place was a hell hole and I am so glad that I got out. I never realized how out of place and miserable I was until I came to Morgantown. I mean, Morgantown is by no means where I want to spend the rest of my life, but it helped me to realize that I don't belong in a small mostly hick town, I belong in a city. I need to be around people that I don't doubt are smarter than me, and that I can have good conversation with. I enjoy the bad drivers and judging the sluts that stumble down High Street every Saturday night completely wasted. I mean, I was never exposed to any of this in Cameron. I want to see the world. I want to live in a foreign country for a year. I want to be cultured and civilized, but still maintain my American spunk and attitude. Being away from Cameron helped me to realize how much I felt trapped there, and, more than that, how lonely I was. No offense to any of my old friends, but the people that I hang out with now are the exact opposite. Well, I guess there are two groups I chill with now. The cool, awesome pot smokers, and the church going nicest people that you will ever meet. First things first, I still have never smoked pot simply because I do not feel the need to and I am not against it or anything like that, and second, I am not saying that any of my old friends were not nice, but these people just feel different. I don't feel like I have to fit in, or act like someone else, I am me. I also discover that I am actually kind of shy. Unless I am in the right mood, I don't really go out of my way to talk to someone I see. I dunno, maybe that isn't really shyness, but it happens pretty often.
So I need to seek some advice from you virtual people. So I am still dating Nelson, although we are currently not really dating, but we're just working on things. Whatever the hell that means, I broke up with him, and the working on shit was his idea. I found out more shit that he did, and I really don't want to date him any more. Plus, I met this other guy that I really really really like. I'll talk more later, I'm going to bed for now :)
So college is pretty blah. My class aren't really hard, but I discovered that it only takes one challenging class for me to get freaked out and panic. PS, Italian is a bullshit language and nobody should ever voluntarily try to take it. Other than that, most of my classes are either writing classes or theater tech ones. Something that I discovered about myself was that I am a terrible actor, but apparently I am a bitchin director. I'm going to stick with that, although I do want to take another acting class because I was going through some shit when I took 144.
So I went back and read through some of the journals of the actual people I know on here, and I have to say, I saw on Cheyanne's journal where she talked about going back and reading Jenn's and Scott's, and I honestly barely remember that whole thing. Is that bad? I mean, I literally do not remember jr.high school, or the beginning of high school. I don't really care because that place was a hell hole and I am so glad that I got out. I never realized how out of place and miserable I was until I came to Morgantown. I mean, Morgantown is by no means where I want to spend the rest of my life, but it helped me to realize that I don't belong in a small mostly hick town, I belong in a city. I need to be around people that I don't doubt are smarter than me, and that I can have good conversation with. I enjoy the bad drivers and judging the sluts that stumble down High Street every Saturday night completely wasted. I mean, I was never exposed to any of this in Cameron. I want to see the world. I want to live in a foreign country for a year. I want to be cultured and civilized, but still maintain my American spunk and attitude. Being away from Cameron helped me to realize how much I felt trapped there, and, more than that, how lonely I was. No offense to any of my old friends, but the people that I hang out with now are the exact opposite. Well, I guess there are two groups I chill with now. The cool, awesome pot smokers, and the church going nicest people that you will ever meet. First things first, I still have never smoked pot simply because I do not feel the need to and I am not against it or anything like that, and second, I am not saying that any of my old friends were not nice, but these people just feel different. I don't feel like I have to fit in, or act like someone else, I am me. I also discover that I am actually kind of shy. Unless I am in the right mood, I don't really go out of my way to talk to someone I see. I dunno, maybe that isn't really shyness, but it happens pretty often.
So I need to seek some advice from you virtual people. So I am still dating Nelson, although we are currently not really dating, but we're just working on things. Whatever the hell that means, I broke up with him, and the working on shit was his idea. I found out more shit that he did, and I really don't want to date him any more. Plus, I met this other guy that I really really really like. I'll talk more later, I'm going to bed for now :)