lots of issues
So I slept over with Aaron last night and we stayed up til 3:30 talking. We spent 6 hours discussing things lol. The first three hours of that were me telling my life story and Aaron finishing his with talking about high school. And then we discussed our current situation...Apparently he hasn't really broken things off with Marilla yet which is kind of alarming, I didn't know that. But....He says he doesn't want to hurt either of us and he can't decide because Marilla is more easily hurt but also it would be dumb for him to try and stay with her through four years of college and not getting to see her ever except during the break. Speaking of which, Thanksgiving break will make our decision lol because Marilla will probably want to be close with him again then. I'm glad that he discussed this with me, it means he's gotten over just sneaking around and pretending that it isn't a big deal to kiss someone else. But we will have to figure something out because both Marilla and I are being shortchanged and confused at the moment. What would you suggest?
I'm thinking that I'll just have to back down. I can't see any other way, if I got any more involved with him while he's still with Marilla I'd just feel used. And besides, he's not like the love of my life or anything lol. This is actually a good opportunity to make everyone else feel less uneasy about me being with him ^^ He explained everything and he said he's sorry, it was partly his fault although there were also other things, like he kept trying to break up with Dianna and it kept not working, she was very clingy, also during the summer he was impossibly lonely and Marilla had recently stopped talking to him for some strange reason so yeah. It's not perfect, he's not perfect but it's understandable. Like me hating to watch Risa with Colin, I have no moral right to tell her to stop but it just hurts me so I say it anyways. Like Marilla not being with him but still having a right to make me step down because of how strongly she feels. We have to take those things into account too.
Mew....It's a little sad to me that this will be the second time this fall that I've had to back down for another girl, lol. Ah.....It's not even necessarily that I don't want to be with him, I'm just better at keeping myself in denial than Marilla is.
It might also, depending on how much he actually likes me it might be worse for him to lose me because he would only have Marilla who is so far away.
I'm thinking that I'll just have to back down. I can't see any other way, if I got any more involved with him while he's still with Marilla I'd just feel used. And besides, he's not like the love of my life or anything lol. This is actually a good opportunity to make everyone else feel less uneasy about me being with him ^^ He explained everything and he said he's sorry, it was partly his fault although there were also other things, like he kept trying to break up with Dianna and it kept not working, she was very clingy, also during the summer he was impossibly lonely and Marilla had recently stopped talking to him for some strange reason so yeah. It's not perfect, he's not perfect but it's understandable. Like me hating to watch Risa with Colin, I have no moral right to tell her to stop but it just hurts me so I say it anyways. Like Marilla not being with him but still having a right to make me step down because of how strongly she feels. We have to take those things into account too.
Mew....It's a little sad to me that this will be the second time this fall that I've had to back down for another girl, lol. Ah.....It's not even necessarily that I don't want to be with him, I'm just better at keeping myself in denial than Marilla is.
It might also, depending on how much he actually likes me it might be worse for him to lose me because he would only have Marilla who is so far away.