After an overlong day
Today I was a bridesmaid in my best friend's wedding; I watched one of my favorite people get married to a wonderful guy. The morning, the wedding, the reception, and the after party were all great, and a day that started at 9 am is just wrapping up at 1:30 am on what is technically the next day. The ceremony went great and I couldn't stop grinning like a fool the whole time, I was so happy for them.
But you know, I couldn't help thinking about Jen.
It was kind of unavoidable. Jill and Jen were inseparable for years; they were a unit and you couldn't help thinking of them that way. Jill has remained close to Jen's family, and her parents and several of her other relatives were invited and attended the ceremony and the reception. The only two times Jill lost her cool during the ceremony were when she was looking at Jen's parents; I talked to them at the reception and frankly I don't know how they held it together. But even before I saw them, as I was taking my place up at the front of the church with the rest of the wedding party, I was thinking of Jen.
She should have been there.
Even now that I'm no longer Christian and in fact don't believe in much of anything, some part of me still wants to believe that something of who we are survives after we die. Because if it does, that might mean that Jen COULD have been there.
I'm very tired and I don't want to get too introspective; I'm not really depressed, and I had a great day. I just felt like I should say something to mark these thoughts.
I hope you're all having a good weekend. :)
But you know, I couldn't help thinking about Jen.
It was kind of unavoidable. Jill and Jen were inseparable for years; they were a unit and you couldn't help thinking of them that way. Jill has remained close to Jen's family, and her parents and several of her other relatives were invited and attended the ceremony and the reception. The only two times Jill lost her cool during the ceremony were when she was looking at Jen's parents; I talked to them at the reception and frankly I don't know how they held it together. But even before I saw them, as I was taking my place up at the front of the church with the rest of the wedding party, I was thinking of Jen.
She should have been there.
Even now that I'm no longer Christian and in fact don't believe in much of anything, some part of me still wants to believe that something of who we are survives after we die. Because if it does, that might mean that Jen COULD have been there.
I'm very tired and I don't want to get too introspective; I'm not really depressed, and I had a great day. I just felt like I should say something to mark these thoughts.
I hope you're all having a good weekend. :)