So it's either PMS or I'm just a bitch....
Ok, so it's been an interesting week so far and I need to just get some of it down before going today.
1. Volleyball on Monday was fun. We were slaughtered 21-12, 21-5 but it was still great fun. One of my teammates keeps making really snarky comments to me, belittling Wellesley, myself, and women in general. I really hate it! Honest to god, he accused me of just being in this masters program to get my MRS. wtf? I didn't think people actually even said things like that to women any more. He also calls Wellelsey "just a little all-girls school" (though he knows nothing about it). It really is a running attempt of his to make me freak out I think. But he just mutters these things to me so I think it's just passive aggressive. OK, I won't keep dwelling on this, it's just that I have to talk with him tonight in class and I really really dread it.
2. Teaching this week has sucked so hard! Omg. The lab should take about 6 hours and we have to do it in 3 so we are rushing and the kids hate it, and none of the microscope slides were working and it was chaos and I have to go back and do it again today, all over again. Ick! I officially never want to be a teacher (unless I have full authority over the lesson plan). And during yesturdays lab, Wayne and Dan stopped by. I was totally thrilled to see Dan but then Wayne starts "teasing" me, telling me my class is out of control and his lab wasn't like that, and everything worked for his monday lab... etc. I kicked him out, but he wouldn't take me seriously. He even started going around answering questions (which I didn't mind but it was a little weird). Dan eventually saw that I was a. going to punch Wayne, b. start crying or c. both of those. So the guys made a quick exit. Luckily after lab, they came back and Wayne started his lab and Dan just hung out with me for about an hour (kinda to make sure I was ok). Lab wasn't that bad, in all truth, but seeing it through a different "teachers" critical eyes made me really really insecure, and question everything I was doing.
3. Speaking of being insecure.... I must have PMS, I am crying at the drop of a hat. My black and white cat is missing too, just to add on to it all (for a week now). I know today will be fine but I just am pissed that everytime I seem to get provoked into losing my temper (and I mean TOTALLY losing it!) it's around Dan. The same guy who also told me he reads people so well, he has already classified everyone based on the type of person they remind him of. So we all get put in a little box, metaphorically speaking, and although Dan and I have talked about a lot of other people and their classifications... I am SCARED. TO. DEATH to hear where I must fit. I don't think I am enlightened enough to ask about where he thinks I must be coming from. We get along too well for me to mess it up worrying about how my personality must look to someone looking in from the outside and judging my every word.
OK, sorry about the rant... It's just one of those days that I can't even start until I get some stuff out of my head. It's so frustrating, this feeling of not being in control of my temper. I hate it. Here's hoping today will be more relaxed. I'll probably go observe some of Dan's lab today (it's right before mine) so at least that will be nice. Other than that? I'm just going to try to make the best out of a nasty rainy day.
~Lindsey
1. Volleyball on Monday was fun. We were slaughtered 21-12, 21-5 but it was still great fun. One of my teammates keeps making really snarky comments to me, belittling Wellesley, myself, and women in general. I really hate it! Honest to god, he accused me of just being in this masters program to get my MRS. wtf? I didn't think people actually even said things like that to women any more. He also calls Wellelsey "just a little all-girls school" (though he knows nothing about it). It really is a running attempt of his to make me freak out I think. But he just mutters these things to me so I think it's just passive aggressive. OK, I won't keep dwelling on this, it's just that I have to talk with him tonight in class and I really really dread it.
2. Teaching this week has sucked so hard! Omg. The lab should take about 6 hours and we have to do it in 3 so we are rushing and the kids hate it, and none of the microscope slides were working and it was chaos and I have to go back and do it again today, all over again. Ick! I officially never want to be a teacher (unless I have full authority over the lesson plan). And during yesturdays lab, Wayne and Dan stopped by. I was totally thrilled to see Dan but then Wayne starts "teasing" me, telling me my class is out of control and his lab wasn't like that, and everything worked for his monday lab... etc. I kicked him out, but he wouldn't take me seriously. He even started going around answering questions (which I didn't mind but it was a little weird). Dan eventually saw that I was a. going to punch Wayne, b. start crying or c. both of those. So the guys made a quick exit. Luckily after lab, they came back and Wayne started his lab and Dan just hung out with me for about an hour (kinda to make sure I was ok). Lab wasn't that bad, in all truth, but seeing it through a different "teachers" critical eyes made me really really insecure, and question everything I was doing.
3. Speaking of being insecure.... I must have PMS, I am crying at the drop of a hat. My black and white cat is missing too, just to add on to it all (for a week now). I know today will be fine but I just am pissed that everytime I seem to get provoked into losing my temper (and I mean TOTALLY losing it!) it's around Dan. The same guy who also told me he reads people so well, he has already classified everyone based on the type of person they remind him of. So we all get put in a little box, metaphorically speaking, and although Dan and I have talked about a lot of other people and their classifications... I am SCARED. TO. DEATH to hear where I must fit. I don't think I am enlightened enough to ask about where he thinks I must be coming from. We get along too well for me to mess it up worrying about how my personality must look to someone looking in from the outside and judging my every word.
OK, sorry about the rant... It's just one of those days that I can't even start until I get some stuff out of my head. It's so frustrating, this feeling of not being in control of my temper. I hate it. Here's hoping today will be more relaxed. I'll probably go observe some of Dan's lab today (it's right before mine) so at least that will be nice. Other than that? I'm just going to try to make the best out of a nasty rainy day.
~Lindsey