Defining "success"
"Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it." - Maya Angelou
Maya Angelou is one of those women I have always taken seriously. Her life, her work, her way of being have inspired me to live better, to work better, and to be a better person. So, when the quotation above came through in today's daily dose of inspiration email I get from the folks at Real Simple magazine, I took a moment to think about her definition of success, and to break it down as a way to help me figure out how I'm doing.
Do I like myself?
Honestly, yes, I do. While there are aspects of my current state (a few extra pounds, a couple of nagging health issues, and a chronic case of career dysphoria) that I find less than perfect, I do like myself a great deal. I think I am a good person. I'm honest, generally compassionate, intelligent, and funny. I am pretty good at giving and receiving love. I try to make things better and try not to make them worse. I speak regularly with friends I have known for more than 30 years, and that tells me that I have been pretty consistent over time at being a decent human being.
Do I like what I do?
Hmmm... This question is a little trickier. I am able to do many things quite well, and I even enjoy doing some of them. But only some of them. There are other things I would much rather be doing. For example, I'm a talented writer, and I love writing fiction and poetry, but I hated writing for a living when I was a working journalist. I'm also a good coach and manager, skills that made me a great teacher and advisor to student publications, but I get almost no pleasure out of the daily chore of managing the work and workflow of people who report to me. Honestly, I'd rather scrub floors than deal with personality drama that comes with managing a team of salaried employees. Perhaps less career-oriented is the art I make, which I love to do once I get started. Starting proves daunting at times, mostly because I lose track of time when I'm making art and I can let a lot of "have to do" things slip by when I'm riding the "want to do" train.
Do I like how I do it?
Another tricky part. I do enjoy the approach I take to my work, even the bits of which I'm not so fond. I try to make light work of the heavy lifting. I like that I've gotten quite good at separating my passion for something like writing from my basic needs for food & shelter and that I'm also adept at modulating my intensity of engagement to the amount of reward I get from the activity in question. For example, I get a great deal of enjoyment out of writing a great haiku, so when I'm writing a poem, I bring it all to the table. I don't get so jazzed by writing marketing copy for a web site, so I just play my "B" game, which is still better than most people's "A" games and let it ride. I don't really know if I like that or not, but it's a method that works for me most days.
In all, I guess I come up pretty evenly split on this little exercise in self-examination. Plenty of room for improvement and lots more to think about.
Maya Angelou is one of those women I have always taken seriously. Her life, her work, her way of being have inspired me to live better, to work better, and to be a better person. So, when the quotation above came through in today's daily dose of inspiration email I get from the folks at Real Simple magazine, I took a moment to think about her definition of success, and to break it down as a way to help me figure out how I'm doing.
Do I like myself?
Honestly, yes, I do. While there are aspects of my current state (a few extra pounds, a couple of nagging health issues, and a chronic case of career dysphoria) that I find less than perfect, I do like myself a great deal. I think I am a good person. I'm honest, generally compassionate, intelligent, and funny. I am pretty good at giving and receiving love. I try to make things better and try not to make them worse. I speak regularly with friends I have known for more than 30 years, and that tells me that I have been pretty consistent over time at being a decent human being.
Do I like what I do?
Hmmm... This question is a little trickier. I am able to do many things quite well, and I even enjoy doing some of them. But only some of them. There are other things I would much rather be doing. For example, I'm a talented writer, and I love writing fiction and poetry, but I hated writing for a living when I was a working journalist. I'm also a good coach and manager, skills that made me a great teacher and advisor to student publications, but I get almost no pleasure out of the daily chore of managing the work and workflow of people who report to me. Honestly, I'd rather scrub floors than deal with personality drama that comes with managing a team of salaried employees. Perhaps less career-oriented is the art I make, which I love to do once I get started. Starting proves daunting at times, mostly because I lose track of time when I'm making art and I can let a lot of "have to do" things slip by when I'm riding the "want to do" train.
Do I like how I do it?
Another tricky part. I do enjoy the approach I take to my work, even the bits of which I'm not so fond. I try to make light work of the heavy lifting. I like that I've gotten quite good at separating my passion for something like writing from my basic needs for food & shelter and that I'm also adept at modulating my intensity of engagement to the amount of reward I get from the activity in question. For example, I get a great deal of enjoyment out of writing a great haiku, so when I'm writing a poem, I bring it all to the table. I don't get so jazzed by writing marketing copy for a web site, so I just play my "B" game, which is still better than most people's "A" games and let it ride. I don't really know if I like that or not, but it's a method that works for me most days.
In all, I guess I come up pretty evenly split on this little exercise in self-examination. Plenty of room for improvement and lots more to think about.