--It's My Perogative--
Talking to Alesha has really enlightened me.. so I think Im going to go public with who I like.. some people might be offended.. but thats a risk im going to take.
I like Johnnie Mac. And I have for a while.. Like since before me and Canaan broke up. I know that once of my friends likes him (No names mentioned) and thats why i kept it a secret for a while. I didnt want to make anyone mad and I still dont. All i want is to be happy, for once. That's all I ask.. just to be happy. I love this person a lot, and Im pretty sure they would be mad at me, but when I first realized that I liked this person, I didnt know my friend did too. It wasnt one of those things where someone told me she liked him, and I was like "If she likes him I need to too, just to make her mad." Never was it like that.. I mean, I just found out she likes him recently. But I like Johnnie Mac too much to just stop talking to him. He's the first person that Ive liked this much in a while.. and I really dont know what to do about all of this. On one hand, I really want to date him. On the other, I dont want to make anyone mad. To be honest, I dont think theres too much to worry about, cause I really dont think he likes me.. but theres always hope. I really dont want to make any more people mad in high school.. Ive lost a lot of people allready and I really dont know how many more I can lose.. life was good back in 8th grade. But now it sucks and all I want to do is cry all the time. Not a day goes by that something doesnt F up on me or something just happens to make me hate my life.. Guess it's just part of the addolencent process..
so anyways.. if my friend who likes jmac too reads this.. i still love you, and the only reason Ive kept this from you is BECAUSE i love you and didnt want to make you mad. yes, i like johnnie mac, but i love you.
i feel so distant from everybody.. just alone all the time and this is the logical way to be happy for me. even if nothing comes from this... just getting all this off my chest makes me feel 100% better.
i love everybody.. and i want to be happy.. too much to ask for?
I like Johnnie Mac. And I have for a while.. Like since before me and Canaan broke up. I know that once of my friends likes him (No names mentioned) and thats why i kept it a secret for a while. I didnt want to make anyone mad and I still dont. All i want is to be happy, for once. That's all I ask.. just to be happy. I love this person a lot, and Im pretty sure they would be mad at me, but when I first realized that I liked this person, I didnt know my friend did too. It wasnt one of those things where someone told me she liked him, and I was like "If she likes him I need to too, just to make her mad." Never was it like that.. I mean, I just found out she likes him recently. But I like Johnnie Mac too much to just stop talking to him. He's the first person that Ive liked this much in a while.. and I really dont know what to do about all of this. On one hand, I really want to date him. On the other, I dont want to make anyone mad. To be honest, I dont think theres too much to worry about, cause I really dont think he likes me.. but theres always hope. I really dont want to make any more people mad in high school.. Ive lost a lot of people allready and I really dont know how many more I can lose.. life was good back in 8th grade. But now it sucks and all I want to do is cry all the time. Not a day goes by that something doesnt F up on me or something just happens to make me hate my life.. Guess it's just part of the addolencent process..
so anyways.. if my friend who likes jmac too reads this.. i still love you, and the only reason Ive kept this from you is BECAUSE i love you and didnt want to make you mad. yes, i like johnnie mac, but i love you.
i feel so distant from everybody.. just alone all the time and this is the logical way to be happy for me. even if nothing comes from this... just getting all this off my chest makes me feel 100% better.
i love everybody.. and i want to be happy.. too much to ask for?