face the past, realize the future
I'm reading my past entries as I save them for my external hard drive (There's so many things I can think of that I want to save forever and ever, but that's for another entry.). Looking back on all the hard times with my mother... i told her i hated her and that i never wanted to see her again, and now realising how essential she has been in this fight for my life. Seeing the big "tragedies" with the most important people in my life,my friends, become mere squabbles in the scheme of things. And those words that I raged against for so long, that my tita insisted on, friends are nothing, family is everything.
While I can't say I completely agree on the two extremes I see her point. The times have gotten tough, and true colors have begun to show. There is only so much that even the best of friends can do for me in this situation. My family has to do the "grunt work", as Juan puts it so well. The daily activities of cleaning the stench of vomit out of my skin and letting me relieve myself for the third time in an hour are not activities that are appropriate for those you call friends.
In defense of friends, they have all been great to check on my progress. They make sure that I'm well after each chemo. Certain ones bring my favorite foods to the hospital. The best one brings me Starbucks and flowers that never die!
I think what my tita fails to realise is that family isn't everything. Friends are the sand that you pour in a glass after all the large stones. I look at this glass of life and see the support of my largest stones. I see how my friends fill in the gaps that they can't possibly reach. Last, but not least, my water comes does everything that no one else could. I love you Juan.
While I can't say I completely agree on the two extremes I see her point. The times have gotten tough, and true colors have begun to show. There is only so much that even the best of friends can do for me in this situation. My family has to do the "grunt work", as Juan puts it so well. The daily activities of cleaning the stench of vomit out of my skin and letting me relieve myself for the third time in an hour are not activities that are appropriate for those you call friends.
In defense of friends, they have all been great to check on my progress. They make sure that I'm well after each chemo. Certain ones bring my favorite foods to the hospital. The best one brings me Starbucks and flowers that never die!
I think what my tita fails to realise is that family isn't everything. Friends are the sand that you pour in a glass after all the large stones. I look at this glass of life and see the support of my largest stones. I see how my friends fill in the gaps that they can't possibly reach. Last, but not least, my water comes does everything that no one else could. I love you Juan.