Prepare for a LONG one
I didnt realize how long its been since ive writtin in this thing!... so hmm.. fill in on my dramatic life so far...Jeff is gone... for good... well one of them.. lol.. down to 3.. lol.. Kevin.. gone too... now its just me myself and I, and i like it... im enjoying doing what i want, when i want. its quite entertaining. my parents and i, are finally gettin on a good track.. i talk to them daily, and have come to appreciate them so much more, really, not much fighting anymore. i just.. i dont know where to start anymore. There have been some serious problems with my ex bf Kyle... he was in the hospital there for a little bit... i dont know what to do for him, hes so depressed, so unhappy, i just pray that he can get his life together again, and find that happiness he so desperatly deserves. Hes out in Cali now, needed to escape. Living with his sister a little bit. I understand its a good thing, i just worry, cause i kno that the area hes in, is going to bring back memories of the horrible past hes had. I hope things go ok, and miss him like crazy, he was becoming a good friend finally, someone i could talk to when school or whatever else on my mind was bothering me. Kevin.... as some dont know, became controlling. Told me i wasnt allowed to do a lot of things. Im too independant i guess, I couldnt stand it. now school... i dont know.... I like it, i LOVE my history classes, but all the other stuff, i just cant seem to make myself go... i hate the classes, and they just seem like a drag, needless to say... this semester, my grades are horribly bad, and i know a few of you will be very dissapointed in me.. that is if anyone reads this anymore. Ive been talking to Mike a lot lately. were gettin back into being friends again, after everything that happened in the past. Ive noticed now.. all my friends are guys.. i wonder why? prolly cause most the girls in my life, are well.. hmm a pain.. lol.. i fight a lot with a certain few. I just.. i need to go into seclusion maybe... let myself get all my thoughts in order and figure myself out. Then came the sudden realization of being 19 here in a month and a half... SCARY!.. im getting old... and i dont like it. but then again i do. It seems like ive done a lot of changing in these past months. Ive opened my eyes a lot more.... understand a lot more... i dont kno how to explain who i am anymore... i think im a little too serious now tho... maybe its just who i am.. but since this is forever long now.. im going... i'll try updating more now... i promise..