(no subject)
So much of this year I've spent doubting myself. Today, in my seminar class we were talking about feeling like maybe we weren't cut out for grad school. Not that that is true, but that a lot of us feel like that. We feel this fear, like maybe we won't make it through. And that is a scary thought. We feel so passionately about this field, what if we don't get to actually DO IT? I think this fear is because we are so passionate; we can't imagine not being able to do this. And it is for that very same reason, that we will make it through and we will be social workers. Great ones. Because we care so much that we doubt our own abilities. We fear something devastating.
I was telling my supervisor the other day that often feel like I'm not making a big enough difference in these kids' lives. That they have wayyyyy bigger problems than I know how to help them with, and improvement has been slow, at best.
She asked me, "Have you ever been in therapy?"
I said, "Yes. Several times in my life."
She said, "And did it get a little easier every time?"
I thought about this for a minute.
I said, "Yes. Actually, it did."
She said, "You are making a difference even if you can't see it. You are planting a seed. A seed that will grow in time. You might never see the product of that seed, but you are planting it."
I've never been much of a gardener, so hopefully this goes well. I do see what she means though. And it did make me feel better. I got some perspective, at least. You gets lots of perspective in this field, that's for sure.
I was telling my supervisor the other day that often feel like I'm not making a big enough difference in these kids' lives. That they have wayyyyy bigger problems than I know how to help them with, and improvement has been slow, at best.
She asked me, "Have you ever been in therapy?"
I said, "Yes. Several times in my life."
She said, "And did it get a little easier every time?"
I thought about this for a minute.
I said, "Yes. Actually, it did."
She said, "You are making a difference even if you can't see it. You are planting a seed. A seed that will grow in time. You might never see the product of that seed, but you are planting it."
I've never been much of a gardener, so hopefully this goes well. I do see what she means though. And it did make me feel better. I got some perspective, at least. You gets lots of perspective in this field, that's for sure.