(no subject)

[lillulu2005]

ok sooo the canadian is gone... i think i was blinded by the ooo soo cute candadian accent .... cuz seriously... he was nuts... i knew the guy like a week and its omg i love ... meet my parents ... move in with me... marry me... hold up there buddy... lol.. time out! im only 19... not ready for this... i just want sum1 i can cuddle with and not have to worry bout love and marriage and kids... cheese and rice... butyeah... pats gone... i am saddened... but i think it was for the best... all the relationship was doing was causing me stress... that i don't need right now... but alas, i still love him... alot .... i think i always will... i haven't seen him in almost a month... i miss him... we are still frends and he stillw ants to go to chuckie cheese with me... which i am uber excited about.. lol... cuz i love chuckie cheese's lol.. but yeah.. im tryin to not get my hopes up...cuz wen i see us going ,i see myself sitting on the bench outside the mall waiting for him... and then i see him and start running at hima nd we hug and smooch and everythings alright again... but i know it won't happen... he says he doesn't have time for a gf right now... but he does... if i can work 2 partitme jobs and go to scool 40 hours a week... and still be able to MAKE time for him... then he can take a few hours out of his busy 30 hour work week and come and see me.... he has time.. he just doesn''t want to make the time... i blame joe... everything was fine until he started hangin out with joe again... all of a sudden it was can i callu back joes coming over.. or joes over and i don't wann be rude or im getting ready to go over to joe's., can i call u back lol... its like joe was his gf not me... butyeah enough sa shit for now.... lol... my check this next week should be pretty goood i already have like 23 hours this week lol... holla!!! lol.. butyeah... sooo i am single once againa nd quite lonely... i just want sum1 to cuddle with... and right now the only person that is willing to do that with me is sum1 im not even remotely interested in.... and the guy i am interested in probebly thinks im a psycho...

my life is curmbling right before me... and all i can do is watch.... y does life have to be so hard??