~*~*~Read if you want i wouldn't though~*~*~
Hey,
I know i haven't made a new entry in a long time over a month to be honest but its just my life here lately has been so confusing and messed up that i can't even really talk, or write down about it... i just been thinking about alot of stuff...about my past, now and future and things are never good at times...i mean i have nothing really to be worried about but i just can't help it....i have just got to a point in life that i am just plain i mean everything is the same day after day and nothing changes....i have tried to change it but everything seems to fall right back into a same old same old basis after a while....so what is the use of even trying to change it if it won't be like that for a while.....see i know you guys are prob. confused by now if not then i am so glad you can keep up with this..ur doing better then me....see my life is on a time basis...i get up go to school, go to class, talk to friends, come home, sleep and do the same thing all over again....i mean there are some things in life that i wish i could change...i mean i wish i could change things that happened 2 years ago and then maybe things would be different now.....things might be better...i could have my best friend back, i could have my happiness back, i could have all the ppl that i lost back and then everything would be fine....that is the only thing that i need in life to be happy and i can't have it...no matter how much i try i can't seem to be happy anymore...i lost my friends and that ended the happiness....my happiness only comes back when there around and thats only like once in a full moon....cause i can't have all of them cause they are all over this united states and in germany....i lost them one by one and i have alot of other friends but no one can take the place that they did....no matter how much i wouldn't smile they would do there best to get me to smile and i miss that i don't have no more....now i have ppl that just bug me to death until i tell them and then they just leave me alone without trying to make it better...i have gotten used to it though...shouldn't but i have....but i am going to go..i have to go sit and ponder
I know i haven't made a new entry in a long time over a month to be honest but its just my life here lately has been so confusing and messed up that i can't even really talk, or write down about it... i just been thinking about alot of stuff...about my past, now and future and things are never good at times...i mean i have nothing really to be worried about but i just can't help it....i have just got to a point in life that i am just plain i mean everything is the same day after day and nothing changes....i have tried to change it but everything seems to fall right back into a same old same old basis after a while....so what is the use of even trying to change it if it won't be like that for a while.....see i know you guys are prob. confused by now if not then i am so glad you can keep up with this..ur doing better then me....see my life is on a time basis...i get up go to school, go to class, talk to friends, come home, sleep and do the same thing all over again....i mean there are some things in life that i wish i could change...i mean i wish i could change things that happened 2 years ago and then maybe things would be different now.....things might be better...i could have my best friend back, i could have my happiness back, i could have all the ppl that i lost back and then everything would be fine....that is the only thing that i need in life to be happy and i can't have it...no matter how much i try i can't seem to be happy anymore...i lost my friends and that ended the happiness....my happiness only comes back when there around and thats only like once in a full moon....cause i can't have all of them cause they are all over this united states and in germany....i lost them one by one and i have alot of other friends but no one can take the place that they did....no matter how much i wouldn't smile they would do there best to get me to smile and i miss that i don't have no more....now i have ppl that just bug me to death until i tell them and then they just leave me alone without trying to make it better...i have gotten used to it though...shouldn't but i have....but i am going to go..i have to go sit and ponder