Jun 06, 2010 10:54
My GPA is going to suck this quarter. So much compared to the last two quarters.
I definitely did too much slacking off in the middle, and even though I did pretty well on the two finals I had, it wasn't enough to bring one of them into the A range, and I worry about the one that hasn't been released yet. I was able to slack off fall and winter quarter, because chem was easy, and math was review... but not this quarter. Not with real chem and math, and the addition of physics, which gave me 3 legit classes to worry about. I couldn't pull that off without upping my amount of effort and work, which I didn't do.
A B+ isn't good enough.
B has such an average sound to it. An average sound for average people, and though I am an average person just like everyone else, we all like to pretend we're special in the little ways that we control it. And for the people in my dorm, and the family I come from, we prove our specialty and worth through academics.
I remember the viral youtube video that went around a few years ago. The crazy Asian mother one. "We come all the way from far country China just to born you here in America... just so you can get a B+." I feel like that. My parents came all the way from far country China, brought me over here from far country China, just so I could get a B+. Probably more than one B+, depending on how the rest of finals go.
I'm sorry Mom. And Dad. And I'm sorry Jessica, because I let myself down.
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I don't think the people in my dorm are ever going to understand the concept of Asian parents unless they have them. Yes there's pressure to have a good major, to be get good grades, to take care of your family, even to the point of helping pay your sister's college tuition if the need comes to that and you can... but these are obligations of love, even if they're forced on you. And though it kind of seems weird, it's my kind of weird, so suck it.
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Okay. No moar moping. CRAM FOR MATH! :o