I can say I hope it will be worth what I give up
Why do you think there are so many depression meds advertised these days? I think the obvious first answer to that is because everyone is depressed...duh...thank you for your brilliance. But I think it's job dissatisfaction. I know I am kind of an extreme, but I believe my work should be a reflection of me and my passions in life. Even further, my career is a crucial part of my identity. 7 years of crappy jobs and an economy that has permeated this society makes it easy to believe I don't qualify for or deserve what I have been trained for. It works. All the negativity about getting jobs, and relevant, non-humiliating ones freaks me out and really just adds to the anxiety of freelancing.
So naturally like the herds of others, I feel like my only option to regain confidence is to get my masters. Make myself overqualified like all of those people up to their ears in debt for school they shouldnt need for an entry level job. I guess I am not talking about getting an entry level job. I suppose a masters degree would give people a level of confidence in me. But am I just backpedaling on really starting things up? Its kind of hard to say. I am just feeling lethargic, in general.
I have only found two programs that seem to fit my needs in the area. The first is through MSU, an advertising masters. Classes are offered on their Troy campus, so thats pretty close. However, the degree is around 36 credits without a thesis (I kind of want to avoid a thesis if possible since I will also be working on a freelancing business despite my insecurity).On top of that, if you dont have a background in advertising already, they ask that you enroll the spring prior to actually beginning classes to gain some kind of experience. that's asking a lot in my opinion. If I want to take on something I haven't done before, that should be my challenge. Measure my ability to learn with your fun standardized tests. Do whatever your alleged assesments of creativity are. But it just feels excessive to add another semester that I will likely have to pay for.
My second and favorite option is at Eastern. I've been kind of dreaming about the program for at least 6 months. Eastern is kind of far...but if I took evening classes I could probably swing just going after work. It's a profeessional writing program that covers technical, pr, and other relevatn types of writing that I may encounter. At first I really thought it was impractical. But once the idea of working for myself unfolded, I realize that the program I want may be exactly the program I need.
So, I think it requires the GRE...I will have to look into it some more. But I am Kind of excited at the thought of grad school.
Anyway...
Here are my songs for the day:
Oh my god, Lily Allen
Don't Fuck with Love, David Hillyard
Bullet proof...I wish I was, Radiohead
Last Summer, Pete Yorn
Social Development Dance, Pete Yorn
Magpie to the Morning, Neko Case
And here is my attempt at daily writing which I was remotely satisfied with:
You wont settle, but
You can't have it all
You wont let go
But you can't break his heart
You still wonder
Though it's fallen apart
That's the irony
Dichotomy
Apparently
I'm growing wise
In spite of me
And learning
To forgive my regrets -
They're unsafe bets
On cards I don.t have
To play.
Probably kind a long chorus to a song. I liked it a lot earlier. Now it just feels pretty goddamn mediocure. But that's just generally how I feel about things that rhyme...which is probably why I have also never written a song I liked, either.
Oh well. time for the last episode of Parks & Rec Season 2!
So naturally like the herds of others, I feel like my only option to regain confidence is to get my masters. Make myself overqualified like all of those people up to their ears in debt for school they shouldnt need for an entry level job. I guess I am not talking about getting an entry level job. I suppose a masters degree would give people a level of confidence in me. But am I just backpedaling on really starting things up? Its kind of hard to say. I am just feeling lethargic, in general.
I have only found two programs that seem to fit my needs in the area. The first is through MSU, an advertising masters. Classes are offered on their Troy campus, so thats pretty close. However, the degree is around 36 credits without a thesis (I kind of want to avoid a thesis if possible since I will also be working on a freelancing business despite my insecurity).On top of that, if you dont have a background in advertising already, they ask that you enroll the spring prior to actually beginning classes to gain some kind of experience. that's asking a lot in my opinion. If I want to take on something I haven't done before, that should be my challenge. Measure my ability to learn with your fun standardized tests. Do whatever your alleged assesments of creativity are. But it just feels excessive to add another semester that I will likely have to pay for.
My second and favorite option is at Eastern. I've been kind of dreaming about the program for at least 6 months. Eastern is kind of far...but if I took evening classes I could probably swing just going after work. It's a profeessional writing program that covers technical, pr, and other relevatn types of writing that I may encounter. At first I really thought it was impractical. But once the idea of working for myself unfolded, I realize that the program I want may be exactly the program I need.
So, I think it requires the GRE...I will have to look into it some more. But I am Kind of excited at the thought of grad school.
Anyway...
Here are my songs for the day:
Oh my god, Lily Allen
Don't Fuck with Love, David Hillyard
Bullet proof...I wish I was, Radiohead
Last Summer, Pete Yorn
Social Development Dance, Pete Yorn
Magpie to the Morning, Neko Case
And here is my attempt at daily writing which I was remotely satisfied with:
You wont settle, but
You can't have it all
You wont let go
But you can't break his heart
You still wonder
Though it's fallen apart
That's the irony
Dichotomy
Apparently
I'm growing wise
In spite of me
And learning
To forgive my regrets -
They're unsafe bets
On cards I don.t have
To play.
Probably kind a long chorus to a song. I liked it a lot earlier. Now it just feels pretty goddamn mediocure. But that's just generally how I feel about things that rhyme...which is probably why I have also never written a song I liked, either.
Oh well. time for the last episode of Parks & Rec Season 2!