Update by category!
I know, I've gotten awful about posting updates. I've just honestly been that busy! I finally took a 3-day weekend for myself this week. This is day 3 and I'm really wishing I had a week off, instead of 3 days. Ah well, I'll have the week off later this year. Must save up my vacation time so I can go and finally meet my grandson!
I got a bunch of pics and short videos from my daughter-in-law this morning. I have to say, that's one adorable little boy she had. I can't wait to get out there to actually see him and hold him. My job change came at such a bad time on that front, but we'll work it out! What matters is that he's happy and healthy, and she's recovering from the 3-day ordeal and c-section that saved the lives of she and my grandson. My son is making me very proud. He plays with his son, helps with the things his wife needs to do, and shows that he's really a man and not afraid to step up. He is being a wonderful husband and father. Given the example his father set, and how vastly different he is, I couldn't be prouder of him.
My youngest is job hunting back east, and considering coming out here for better opportunities on that front. Her boyfriend has us all a bit worried right now. He keeps having blood clots show up in his legs. The most recent one had the doctor checking him over fully at the ER, only to announce that the clots are forming in his lungs and moving around. He's on medication to keep them from forming, but he needs to see a specialist. That isn't easy to get to happen without insurance. So, here's hoping that they can get coverage there somehow or that they decide to move out here where I can get them into a job that will provide insurance for both and get him the treatment he needs.
She is actually doing well, despite the stress. I can hear the strain in her voice, but overall she's happy and willing to push through this rough spot without having it rule her outlook. She's always been like that, though. She's one of those fortunate people who just sees that all the rough times will pass and that everything will be alright.
I hope that they'll come out here, myself. Not because I think they need to be near me, but because this city is so wonderful for starting out. There's income enough to support yourself on, low cost of living, cheap education costs, and jobs with real benefits. I don't suggest that anyone come here to stay forever, but coming out to get a foundation started is a great way to look at living here.
My middle child is also doing well. She's settled in at her job, has been recommended for a special project there already, and seems to enjoy the work more often than not. The guy she was dating broke up with her, but she's going forward and doing well. She's looking at places to move to and after a brief round of me having to get really blunt with her, she's being very responsible about handling her responsibilities. She's started considering when to start school out here, and what to study as well. I think she's figured out what I was just saying about this being a good place to start from.
I'm setting in at my job. Honestly, I'm kinda enjoying it more often than not. I have a great boss now that I'm out of training. If I ask for information, he's completely awesome about getting it. If I ask for clarification, he'll often pull me off the phone to have a short meeting so he can answer questions clearly for me. He's positive, cheerful, encouraging, and altogether an awesome boss. Thankfully, I got to pick him for the upcoming shift alignment. That means I'll have another 6 months with him.
Yes, 6 months, not 4. I did a lot of talking with the gal in NYC. Finally I agreed to what she was offering and she was sending me paperwork to get filled out. It hasn't shown up. She hasn't called. If I don't get the papers by Saturday night mail run, I'm not going to waste more time or energy thinking on the matter. It's a little frustrating, but at the same time, even if it was all bs, what a fun and exciting idea to think on. And, hey, I like the job I have right now so it's not like I'm losing anything!
I went to a wet munch (aka cookout at a local social club for the BDSM crowd) on Sunday and I was standing in line to get food from the grill. I heard a lady in front of me speaking, and I knew that I knew the voice. Then I heard her say a name and I knew exactly who it was! I half-squealed her name and sure enough, a friend of mine from YEARS ago who I hadn't seen or heard from since I left the state in 2006!! She and her husband run a local BDSM group, and I'd tried to make contact but never could reach them. I was so excited! I couldn't stop hugging her! THEN I found out that another man from the same group who I'd been friends with was there as well!
I couldn't hardly STAND myself all night! I was just over the top with excitement! They all kept saying how amazing I look, which made me feel good. Everyone got to meet Cw and Nw, too. Cw even got to talk to the other friend, G, who made me a pair of floggers as a birthday gift. C loves those floggers. They got to talking and G offers up that he has a pair made of buffalo leather that Cw can use. I suddenly wanted to find somewhere else to be. Buffalo is HEAVY stuff! Yikes!?
But, yay and lol and all happiness because G is really amazing with the whips and floggers and such. I've seen him at it, and he can no doubt teach Cw a lot about that. Cw also said he's thinking about asking a dom friend of his to do a bit of mentoring for him. I have to say I'm really pleased that he's taking it on himself to learn more. I know I started the "corruption" but it's just not right for a sub to teach the dom everything.
Life at home is mostly calm right now. Nw had a stretch of some real insecurities. I'm not sure of all the details, and likely glad of it. I know what I saw, what little I inferred from vocal tones and the course of events. It wasn't pretty. It's still kind of there, but more muted? I felt for a little while like she was seeing me as a competitor. I tried to talk to her about it, but Nw has one steady defense against any topic that involves emotion. "Oh no, I'm fine!" If the day ever comes that I get through that "I'm fine" routine of hers, I'll likely drop dead from shock. It makes Cw crazy too. Talk about pulling teeth!
Anyway, it's settling, from what I can see. I was so excited that they were willing to head off to NYC with me. Nw sounded most excited about it. We're still talking about finding a larger place for all of us to live after the lease here is up. I'm really happy beyond words about that idea.
I'm really feeling happy and fulfilled and totally content in life right now. The only thing I'd change is to have more space at home. Everything else is pretty much awesomeness to the nth degree. Of course, that means my subconscious gets to freak out. I get to have fun dreams of everything falling apart, just because I'm all happy. Heh. Stupid brain! Shut up or I will stab you with a spork!
I've been thinking much of late that I might do well to go ahead and look for another relationship. Something more casual, rather than anything serious. Naturally, if a serious relationship grows from it, I wouldn't fight it (too much), but still. It's not that anything is lacking, it's that NOTHING is lacking. That's the best part of life right now. I know, I know, how odd to look for more when nothing is lacking. Um, folks, that's a cardinal rule of being polyamorous. You DO NOT add people just because you feel a lack or because there's a problem! You fix your shit at home and THEN you look. Way less drama, way less opportunity for damage.
Look at it this way. If you have a window in your home that has a draft, you're likely to not be looking for a way to fix it until that draft starts either costing money, letting in the elements, or causing an issue. When you do go looking, maybe you'll settle for the possibly ineffective $10 fix instead of the $50 certain fix, because you weren't really planning ahead and thinking about house repairs, so you didn't save any money. Turns out the $10 fix not only doesn't work but causes another $80 in damage trying to uninstall it.
That's what happens if you have trouble at home, any trouble, and go looking for someone else.
Meanwhile, your neighbor down the street had already looked at the windows when they bought the house, knew that they'd likely need replacing in a few yrs, and has prepared well in advance to handle that. He goes out and prices out windows, not repairs, entire windows, and thinks about things like which would fit the space best, which have the aesthetic values he wants to show, and which are the best overall. After careful deliberation, he selects the right windows. The house gains value, the man is more pleased with a home he already loved, and the windows are a perfect fit.
That's what happens when you look for a new relationship when everything is good at home.
So, two things I'm looking at. One is a submissive. I haven't really started that quest just yet. Honestly, I'm kinda nervous. BUT! A sub friend of mine has agreed to be a guinea pig for me and to work with me so that I can learn this end of things better, by having both her input, Cw's input and my own knowledge to work from.
Otherwise, I'm really kinda thinking that a FWB might not be a bad idea. Not a boyfriend or a girlfriend, just someone to hang with, be casual with, and hey, if things get sexy, have that be an option. I suppose I'll see which turns up first?
The only other thing I have going in life right now is that I have a very sick ferret. My Gizmo has been pushed away from the food bowl by Tika so much that I could feel his ribs and his spine last night. She just won't let him eat! Little witch. I've bought a new cage and put him in it with vitamin loaded food. It's much smaller than his regular cage, so he won't be moving around as much and burning off all the calories. I'm just praying he recovers. He's so emaciated right now. I'm really scared for him.
Once he regains his weight, I'm seriously thinking about selling Tika off, or at least putting her in the smaller cage alone. Her gluttony is just impossible. She will literally wrap her arms around the food bowl and lay over the top of it. She has NEVER had to compete for food, she's just like that. I put in two bowls of food for the ferrets, she pushes Gizmo away from both! Zaboo just ignores her, pushes back and eats anyway, but even he has lost a little weight. I think a new home for her may be coming, just because I'm not going to keep a ferret that insists on endangering the others in the group.
I seriously hope that it's just that he hasn't been able to eat that is making Gizmo so thin though. Last night I put him in the new cage with food and he ate for almost 20 minutes straight, and he still keeps waking and going back for more. He has eaten almost a full 1.5 cup serving of food, which is a lot for a ferret to go through in about 14 hrs. It gives me a measure of hope that this is the real problem, and not something worse.
There is also a new cat that is either going to go with my middle child to her new apartment, or likely join the family. She showed up out of nowhere, a stray, starving to death. We fed her, so of course that means she's ours now. She's maybe a year or two old. I'm sure that she belonged to someone not long ago because she still enjoys being with people. She's also been mistreated because she is very skittish. She is especially defensive about the current cat, who is inside the house. I told my daughter that she needs to get the cat fixed and get her shots before she can come inside, and also a trip to a groomer for a solid bathing. I can't risk the cat bringing in some sickness or parasite, not with 3 ferrets and a cat that could become infected. So, we're investigating options to get that done as quickly and cheaply as possible.
And that's my life right now. Busy and busy and more busy, but all going so very well!
I got a bunch of pics and short videos from my daughter-in-law this morning. I have to say, that's one adorable little boy she had. I can't wait to get out there to actually see him and hold him. My job change came at such a bad time on that front, but we'll work it out! What matters is that he's happy and healthy, and she's recovering from the 3-day ordeal and c-section that saved the lives of she and my grandson. My son is making me very proud. He plays with his son, helps with the things his wife needs to do, and shows that he's really a man and not afraid to step up. He is being a wonderful husband and father. Given the example his father set, and how vastly different he is, I couldn't be prouder of him.
My youngest is job hunting back east, and considering coming out here for better opportunities on that front. Her boyfriend has us all a bit worried right now. He keeps having blood clots show up in his legs. The most recent one had the doctor checking him over fully at the ER, only to announce that the clots are forming in his lungs and moving around. He's on medication to keep them from forming, but he needs to see a specialist. That isn't easy to get to happen without insurance. So, here's hoping that they can get coverage there somehow or that they decide to move out here where I can get them into a job that will provide insurance for both and get him the treatment he needs.
She is actually doing well, despite the stress. I can hear the strain in her voice, but overall she's happy and willing to push through this rough spot without having it rule her outlook. She's always been like that, though. She's one of those fortunate people who just sees that all the rough times will pass and that everything will be alright.
I hope that they'll come out here, myself. Not because I think they need to be near me, but because this city is so wonderful for starting out. There's income enough to support yourself on, low cost of living, cheap education costs, and jobs with real benefits. I don't suggest that anyone come here to stay forever, but coming out to get a foundation started is a great way to look at living here.
My middle child is also doing well. She's settled in at her job, has been recommended for a special project there already, and seems to enjoy the work more often than not. The guy she was dating broke up with her, but she's going forward and doing well. She's looking at places to move to and after a brief round of me having to get really blunt with her, she's being very responsible about handling her responsibilities. She's started considering when to start school out here, and what to study as well. I think she's figured out what I was just saying about this being a good place to start from.
I'm setting in at my job. Honestly, I'm kinda enjoying it more often than not. I have a great boss now that I'm out of training. If I ask for information, he's completely awesome about getting it. If I ask for clarification, he'll often pull me off the phone to have a short meeting so he can answer questions clearly for me. He's positive, cheerful, encouraging, and altogether an awesome boss. Thankfully, I got to pick him for the upcoming shift alignment. That means I'll have another 6 months with him.
Yes, 6 months, not 4. I did a lot of talking with the gal in NYC. Finally I agreed to what she was offering and she was sending me paperwork to get filled out. It hasn't shown up. She hasn't called. If I don't get the papers by Saturday night mail run, I'm not going to waste more time or energy thinking on the matter. It's a little frustrating, but at the same time, even if it was all bs, what a fun and exciting idea to think on. And, hey, I like the job I have right now so it's not like I'm losing anything!
I went to a wet munch (aka cookout at a local social club for the BDSM crowd) on Sunday and I was standing in line to get food from the grill. I heard a lady in front of me speaking, and I knew that I knew the voice. Then I heard her say a name and I knew exactly who it was! I half-squealed her name and sure enough, a friend of mine from YEARS ago who I hadn't seen or heard from since I left the state in 2006!! She and her husband run a local BDSM group, and I'd tried to make contact but never could reach them. I was so excited! I couldn't stop hugging her! THEN I found out that another man from the same group who I'd been friends with was there as well!
I couldn't hardly STAND myself all night! I was just over the top with excitement! They all kept saying how amazing I look, which made me feel good. Everyone got to meet Cw and Nw, too. Cw even got to talk to the other friend, G, who made me a pair of floggers as a birthday gift. C loves those floggers. They got to talking and G offers up that he has a pair made of buffalo leather that Cw can use. I suddenly wanted to find somewhere else to be. Buffalo is HEAVY stuff! Yikes!?
But, yay and lol and all happiness because G is really amazing with the whips and floggers and such. I've seen him at it, and he can no doubt teach Cw a lot about that. Cw also said he's thinking about asking a dom friend of his to do a bit of mentoring for him. I have to say I'm really pleased that he's taking it on himself to learn more. I know I started the "corruption" but it's just not right for a sub to teach the dom everything.
Life at home is mostly calm right now. Nw had a stretch of some real insecurities. I'm not sure of all the details, and likely glad of it. I know what I saw, what little I inferred from vocal tones and the course of events. It wasn't pretty. It's still kind of there, but more muted? I felt for a little while like she was seeing me as a competitor. I tried to talk to her about it, but Nw has one steady defense against any topic that involves emotion. "Oh no, I'm fine!" If the day ever comes that I get through that "I'm fine" routine of hers, I'll likely drop dead from shock. It makes Cw crazy too. Talk about pulling teeth!
Anyway, it's settling, from what I can see. I was so excited that they were willing to head off to NYC with me. Nw sounded most excited about it. We're still talking about finding a larger place for all of us to live after the lease here is up. I'm really happy beyond words about that idea.
I'm really feeling happy and fulfilled and totally content in life right now. The only thing I'd change is to have more space at home. Everything else is pretty much awesomeness to the nth degree. Of course, that means my subconscious gets to freak out. I get to have fun dreams of everything falling apart, just because I'm all happy. Heh. Stupid brain! Shut up or I will stab you with a spork!
I've been thinking much of late that I might do well to go ahead and look for another relationship. Something more casual, rather than anything serious. Naturally, if a serious relationship grows from it, I wouldn't fight it (too much), but still. It's not that anything is lacking, it's that NOTHING is lacking. That's the best part of life right now. I know, I know, how odd to look for more when nothing is lacking. Um, folks, that's a cardinal rule of being polyamorous. You DO NOT add people just because you feel a lack or because there's a problem! You fix your shit at home and THEN you look. Way less drama, way less opportunity for damage.
Look at it this way. If you have a window in your home that has a draft, you're likely to not be looking for a way to fix it until that draft starts either costing money, letting in the elements, or causing an issue. When you do go looking, maybe you'll settle for the possibly ineffective $10 fix instead of the $50 certain fix, because you weren't really planning ahead and thinking about house repairs, so you didn't save any money. Turns out the $10 fix not only doesn't work but causes another $80 in damage trying to uninstall it.
That's what happens if you have trouble at home, any trouble, and go looking for someone else.
Meanwhile, your neighbor down the street had already looked at the windows when they bought the house, knew that they'd likely need replacing in a few yrs, and has prepared well in advance to handle that. He goes out and prices out windows, not repairs, entire windows, and thinks about things like which would fit the space best, which have the aesthetic values he wants to show, and which are the best overall. After careful deliberation, he selects the right windows. The house gains value, the man is more pleased with a home he already loved, and the windows are a perfect fit.
That's what happens when you look for a new relationship when everything is good at home.
So, two things I'm looking at. One is a submissive. I haven't really started that quest just yet. Honestly, I'm kinda nervous. BUT! A sub friend of mine has agreed to be a guinea pig for me and to work with me so that I can learn this end of things better, by having both her input, Cw's input and my own knowledge to work from.
Otherwise, I'm really kinda thinking that a FWB might not be a bad idea. Not a boyfriend or a girlfriend, just someone to hang with, be casual with, and hey, if things get sexy, have that be an option. I suppose I'll see which turns up first?
The only other thing I have going in life right now is that I have a very sick ferret. My Gizmo has been pushed away from the food bowl by Tika so much that I could feel his ribs and his spine last night. She just won't let him eat! Little witch. I've bought a new cage and put him in it with vitamin loaded food. It's much smaller than his regular cage, so he won't be moving around as much and burning off all the calories. I'm just praying he recovers. He's so emaciated right now. I'm really scared for him.
Once he regains his weight, I'm seriously thinking about selling Tika off, or at least putting her in the smaller cage alone. Her gluttony is just impossible. She will literally wrap her arms around the food bowl and lay over the top of it. She has NEVER had to compete for food, she's just like that. I put in two bowls of food for the ferrets, she pushes Gizmo away from both! Zaboo just ignores her, pushes back and eats anyway, but even he has lost a little weight. I think a new home for her may be coming, just because I'm not going to keep a ferret that insists on endangering the others in the group.
I seriously hope that it's just that he hasn't been able to eat that is making Gizmo so thin though. Last night I put him in the new cage with food and he ate for almost 20 minutes straight, and he still keeps waking and going back for more. He has eaten almost a full 1.5 cup serving of food, which is a lot for a ferret to go through in about 14 hrs. It gives me a measure of hope that this is the real problem, and not something worse.
There is also a new cat that is either going to go with my middle child to her new apartment, or likely join the family. She showed up out of nowhere, a stray, starving to death. We fed her, so of course that means she's ours now. She's maybe a year or two old. I'm sure that she belonged to someone not long ago because she still enjoys being with people. She's also been mistreated because she is very skittish. She is especially defensive about the current cat, who is inside the house. I told my daughter that she needs to get the cat fixed and get her shots before she can come inside, and also a trip to a groomer for a solid bathing. I can't risk the cat bringing in some sickness or parasite, not with 3 ferrets and a cat that could become infected. So, we're investigating options to get that done as quickly and cheaply as possible.
And that's my life right now. Busy and busy and more busy, but all going so very well!