fic: deus ex machina
Title: Deus Ex Machina [god in the machine]
Chapter: Seven | 2/2
Author: lifeawakening
Words: 8,849 (3,083 for part 2)
Rating: R (For future scary images, language, and sexual references)
Summary: Rachel Berry always knew that she was a little bit psychic. In fact, Rachel Berry thought she knew just about everything. That is, until a spirit that refused to die entered her life like a train-wreck. It's only after Rachel's fallen in love that she realizes life doesn't exactly go as planned; and neither does death, for that matter.
Author's Note: Again, I apologize for the inconvenient split of this chapter.
The snow blanketing the sidewalk crunched under Rachel’s pink, plastic boots as she walked to her favorite park a week later. Christmas day for non-Jews and other non-Christian religions, Rachel thought. To her? Just a quiet day where she could wander around a peaceful Lima and smile at the adorable reindeer and pretty colored lights adorning the neighborhood’s houses.
She sniffed against the chilly wind that had kicked up on an otherwise calm, cloudy day as she adjusted the strap of her duffle bag higher on her shoulder. Rachel reached the park and immediately made her way over to the swing-sets. After brushing some snow off of both of the seats, Rachel sat on one and began gently swinging.
“Hey,” a familiar voice said, ghosting through the wind as the swing next to Rachel moved in the breeze.
Rachel turned her head to the right, her yellow beret dipping low on her head before she pushed it back up with a thumb. “Merry Christmas, Quinn.”
“Merry Christmas, Rachel,” Quinn returned as Rachel felt the familiar pins and needles wash over her right side. She leaned her head into it and smiled as she closed her eyes, imagining the hug. When the tingling left, Rachel stuck her hand out towards the swing next to her and groped the air before her right hand started tingling. Quinn touched her hand.
“Today’s an off day, I see,” Rachel said sadly as she stared at Quinn.
There was a beat of silence where Rachel imagined Quinn nodding. “Looks that way,” the blond said, “That’s okay, though. It’s Christmas, you know? This is the first year that the house has had lights and a tree and everything,” Quinn said silently, ending in a whisper, and Rachel could imagine the accompanied shrug that went with that statement.
“I enjoyed doing that with you though, you know,” Rachel said as she smiled at the memory of her dragging a fir tree into the Fabray household in the dead of night with Leroy’s help and Quinn and Hiram shouting orders from inside the house.
Quinn laughed loudly and Rachel reflexively smiled. “That was wonderful, especially when you got lost in the tree on the way in.”
“Yes, hilarious,” Rachel deadpanned as she rolled her eyes while cracking a small smile, “Speaking of, my fathers gave me permission to stay over tonight.”
Quinn was silent and Rachel turned her head and furrowed her brows. “Unless you’ve changed your mind and wish to-”
“No, no it’s not that,” Quinn quickly cut in, “it’s just weird to think that exactly a week ago I was telling you that I was planning on moving on and now here we are.”
“Here we are,” Rachel whispered as the chill of the air made her breath swirl in front of her. She thought back on how she had sobbed in the bathroom and how Quinn had held her. How Rachel hadn’t been able to say to Quinn what she had wanted to, what she knew would keep Quinn with her. But it had been like Quinn had heard it anyway, because she stayed with Rachel all day. And then came back the next day. And then answered the door two days later when Rachel came knocking.
It was like Quinn had understood what Rachel hadn’t been ready to say, and by Quinn sticking around, it had been like Quinn’s heart had said it back.
The brunette cleared her throat and shook her head. “None of that, now, come on! It’s Christmas day, a jolly day, indeed. It may be a non-solid day for you, but I consider it a - what do you call it? - Christmas miracle, that’s it, that you are still having solid days. Let’s head to your house now. I’ll build a fire and put on It’s A Wonderful Life and you can open your present.”
She heard a groan from next to her. “Seriously? You’re going to force me to watch a movie about a man who is basically turned into a ghost. And wait, I told you not to get me anything.”
Rachel rolled her eyes as she hopped off of the swing and stopped Quinn’s swing from blowing in the wind so the ghost could get off (even if that was undoubtedly unnecessary). “I’m making you watch a timeless classic, Quinn. I’m appalled that you, being the big classic movie buff, haven’t seen it yet,” she said, ignoring the present part of Quinn’s statement.
“I tend to avoid movies that remind me of my own existence,” Quinn said from next to Rachel as they fell into step together as they made their way to Quinn’s.
“That’s certainly no excuse, Quinn,” Rachel said, ignoring the snort of amusement from next to her. “Besides, I’ve never celebrated Christmas, so of course I Googled it and made a PowerPoint on the proper methods.”
“Of course you did,” Quinn responded blandly, “Please tell me you don’t have any fruit cake on you.”
Rachel let out a “Pfft” followed by a quick, nervous laugh as her eyes darted down to her duffle bag and then back to the sidewalk in front of her, “Nonsense.”
There was a loud groan from Quinn as the familiar cherry tree, now covered in snow, came into view. Rachel stifled a giggle as they made their way up the front steps and she opened the door, holding it open for Quinn so the ghost didn’t have to walk through it.
“Thanks,” was whispered into the air as Rachel nodded and shut the door behind herself as she walked in after Quinn.
The Fabray house had been decorated, indeed. It had been Rachel’s idea, days after Quinn had decided to stick around, to give Quinn a proper Christmas. It hadn’t even occurred to her until four days before Christmas, when she saw a TV program about a dancing snowman, that Quinn hadn’t had anyone to celebrate Christmas with in ten years, and how lonely that must of made her feel. Once Rachel had thoroughly researched the holiday and drawn up a PowerPoint, she presented her ideas to her fathers. They had readily agreed and helped Rachel show up at Quinn’s with the biggest Christmas tree that the Berry’s could find. Admittedly, a nine foot tall fir tree had been a bit much, but Rachel had insisted only the best for Quinn.
After the tree had been placed and Quinn had reluctantly shown them where the other decorations were, the Berry’s made a night and day of adorning the Fabray house. If the neighbors questioned why the only Jewish, gay male couple in town and their 5’2” daughter had gone out at midnight and comically hung up lights on the Fabray house while singing classics such as Jingle Bells and Deck the House, they didn’t show it.
It took Rachel falling off of the roof once to decide she was better fit to decorate the inside with Quinn. And decorate she did. There were golden and silver lights strung up around the entire house, mixed with wreaths and holly. Little animated Santas and reindeer statues were neatly placed around the house. The regular (non-used) silverware and plates were replaced with Christmas (non-used) silverware and plates.
The Christmas tree itself had been decorated by both Rachel and Quinn on a day where Quinn had been solid. The girls had taken turns hanging up the many Christmas ornaments after Quinn had strung the colored lights onto it. Rachel had asked Quinn what the story behind each ornament was, and so Quinn told the stories behind each as best as she could remember.
Rachel had also saved the putting up of the manger for when Quinn had been solid, and she pretended to not notice the tears that laced Quinn’s voice as the blond had thanked her for the gesture.
As the girls walked into the highly decorated house, Rachel smiled. While she didn’t celebrate Christmas, she had to admit that the decorations were beautiful. “Do you want anything to drink?” Quinn asked her from in the kitchen, “You still have your almond milk crap in my fridge and some other fruit, water drink things.”
Rachel rolled her eyes as she locked the front door and shrugged out of her red pea coat a took off her yellow beanie, hanging them both on the coat hanger. She slipped out of her pink boots and set her duffle bag by them before padding in her socks towards the kitchen.
Rachel stopped when something in the living room caught her gaze.
There were three presents under the Christmas tree, instead of just the one from Rachel. The curious brunette turned and headed into the living room instead of the kitchen and bent down to inspect the tags. Rachel clutched at her chest as tears welled up in her eyes. Under Quinn’s Christmas tree sat the present from her, as she had placed it, and two new ones. To Quinn, Love Leroy; To Quinnie, Love Hiram. “I love you, both,” the brunette whispered out loud before she jumped a little.
“Are those-” she heard from behind her. Rachel nodded as she turned to smile up at Quinn with teary eyes.
“From my fathers? Yes, they are. Actually….” Rachel trailed off, straightening up and biting her lip. “There’s one more, as well.” Quinn sighed and said something about not needing any presents as Rachel moved past her to the duffle bag by the doorway. That morning, when she had gotten up and was getting ready to go, there had been a knock at the Berry door.
When Rachel was called down she was met with Puck standing there, shifting his weight from one foot to another as he nervously clutched a good sized package wrapped in newspaper. “Can you give this to her?” was all that he had said before briefly hugging Rachel and briskly walking away before he could be rejected. As if Rachel would’ve rejected it.
She pulled the package out of her bag and placed it under the tree, the silence in the air heavy.
“This is from Noah,” Rachel said evenly, slowly, as she kept her gaze on the present.
She hadn’t told Quinn about her encounter with him before and she certainly hadn’t told Quinn that she was friends (and had dated) the younger brother of the boy that had killed her.
“By Noah I assume you mean Puck,” Quinn said.
“Yes,” Rachel breathed out, "you know-"
A patch of frigid air passed by Rachel as Quinn moved in closer to the present before speaking, “I know who he is, and I knew about you two, Rachel, if that’s what you’re nervous about. I’m not a moron, I remember him from when he was younger. He was a cool kid,” she finished and then added, “I’m not mad that you know. I’m…glad that he remembers me and believes you.”
Rachel moved her gaze to Quinn’s face, “You’re really not mad?”
“I’m relieved someone remembers me,” was the quiet answer Rachel received.
“If it were up to me, Quinn, everyone in the town would know of your existence,” Rachel stated firmly, reaching out until she felt a tingling sensation in her hand.
“I’m pretty content with just you and a few others knowing, Rach,” Quinn said with a laugh, “but I’m just…shocked that people cared enough, you know? These presents…they’re more than I’ve had in.…”
Rachel heard Quinn begin to choke up and she immediately pulled Quinn close to her, not even being affected by the fact that something had changed in the air and Quinn was solid again. Rachel hugged Quinn and allowed the blond to cry into her shoulder as she rubbed her back. Quinn was switching from solid to non-solid at the blink of an eye those days, so it was nothing for Rachel to automatically gravitate to the blond when she was about to turn solid again.
Rachel let Quinn cry until there were no more dry tears in the ghost’s body.
----------
For the first time in ten years, Quinn was celebrating Christmas. She just hadn’t allowed herself to before because, really, what did she have to celebrate? That year Quinn had something to celebrate, though. She had a reason to smile at the twinkling colored lights on her house and a reason to sing along with the Christmas music coming from her favorite wind-up Santa.
Late that evening, the ghost gazed at Rachel, in a green and red reindeer sweater, sitting on the floor with Quinn’s wrapped presents in front of her with the TV behind her blaring Christmas Vacation and scrunching her nose up in contempt at every curse word from Chevy Chase’s mouth. Quinn cocked her head as the fireplace from across the room shone light on Rachel’s gorgeous features. Rachel looked up at where she knew Quinn was, and smiled. Quinn smiled back.
“Come open your presents, Quinn.” And so she did. Quinn opened Hiram’s gift of about a dozen classic books that she had mentioned in passing to Rachel once about her wanting to read them. That made her cry. She then opened Leroy’s gift and carefully read the title of the twenty classic horror films that the man had given her. Once again, she cried. Tentatively, Quinn opened Puck’s present, and Rachel scooted a little closer to Quinn as she opened it. Once the newspaper wrapping was torn away, Quinn ran her fingers over the material of her varsity Cheerio jacket from high school. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she looked up at Rachel, who also had tears in her eyes as she saw the word ‘Fabray’ printed on the back.
“He stole this from me a few days before the crash,” Quinn explained, “he had a crush on me and half of the time he and I got along better than Michael and I did. He promised he’d give me it back when he was old enough to date me. I remember calling him a little shit and making him promise to not make any voodoo dolls out of the material,” she finished with a laugh.
Rachel had tears in her eyes, Quinn noticed, but a smile on her face. “That sounds like Noah,” she said, “I just can’t believe he kept it.”
“I can,” Quinn said while nodding, “he was little, but we were friends. He probably felt like he had to keep it to keep the promise.” She saw Rachel nod her head and bite her lip, and Quinn got an idea.
The blond leaned over and placed the jacket on Rachel’s shoulders. Rachel whipped her head and stared at Quinn with her huge, shocked, brown eyes. Quinn smiled. “It looks better on you.”
Rachel nodded her head numbly as she pulled the jacket off of her shoulders and turned it over in her hands. Quinn couldn’t explain the tightening in her chest as Rachel ran her fingers over Quinn’s last name on the back. “Merry Christmas, Rachel,” Quinn said in an attempt to break the silence.
“Thank you, Quinn,” Rachel said through tears. Quinn couldn’t remember the last time she’d had such an emotional Christmas.
Finally, Quinn opened Rachel’s present and gasped. “You got me a record player,” she said in shock as she carefully lifted the machine out of the box.
“I was having the hardest time figuring out what to get you,” Rachel admitted, “Until I saw all of the records up in the attic here in a giant box with your name printed on it. I’m sure I wasn’t actually supposed to open it but of course I did anyway, and I was shocked at what I found. However, I couldn’t find a record player to play it on, and trust me, I scoured the entire house.”
Quinn laughed at Rachel’s bluntness as she ran her hand over the old player before cocking her eyebrow in realization. “This is yours.”
“It is,” Rachel agreed, “along with all of the vinyl at the bottom of that box.”
Quinn stared at Rachel in shock before looking into the box and seeing, just as Rachel said, dozens of records. “Also,” Rachel added, “I brought down all of yours from the attic and cleaned them all up. Now, they’re all organized in the empty cabinet space under the TV. I left space for your movies and books there, as well.”
Quinn’s vision was blurry as she finally tore her gaze from the vinyl and over to Rachel’s face. “How did you-”
“You love music, Quinn, almost as much as I do, which I didn’t think was possible. I figured someone like you wouldn’t have all of those albums unless they truly loved them, and to not have something to play them on is a shame in itself.”
“But this is yours Rach and now-”
“And now it’s where it belongs, it's home,” Rachel finished for Quinn, her eyebrows raised and nodding to reaffirm her point.
Quinn took one look at Rachel, now wearing her old varsity jacket before looking down at the record player on her lap. She looked around at the lights in the house and the blaring TV, into the kitchen across the hall with food on the counter and then over to the roaring fire. She was suddenly overcome with something strong, something powerful enough to cause huge sobs to wrack through her body, something that felt similar to a heart beating in her chest, hard.
As if Rachel knew, as if they'd done it a million times before, she reached over and placed her hand on the back of Quinn’s neck and drew her in for a brief kiss. This was home, Quinn thought. The house she had been hiding from the world in for ten years was finally a home. Her home. With Rachel there, with the life Rachel had brought into it, it was finally a home. Quinn ignored the ever darkening bags under the Rachel’s eyes and the nagging fear at the back of her mind as she leaned over and kissed Rachel again, tugging at her bottom lip with both of her own.
She had someone who remembered her, two men who cared about her, and a girl who (Quinn hoped to God) loved her. Quinn hoped to God that Rachel loved her, because Quinn had never loved someone more in her life than she loved Rachel. Maybe she couldn’t always protect Rachel, but she could love her. For then, that was enough.
Chapter: Seven | 2/2
Author: lifeawakening
Words: 8,849 (3,083 for part 2)
Rating: R (For future scary images, language, and sexual references)
Summary: Rachel Berry always knew that she was a little bit psychic. In fact, Rachel Berry thought she knew just about everything. That is, until a spirit that refused to die entered her life like a train-wreck. It's only after Rachel's fallen in love that she realizes life doesn't exactly go as planned; and neither does death, for that matter.
Author's Note: Again, I apologize for the inconvenient split of this chapter.
The snow blanketing the sidewalk crunched under Rachel’s pink, plastic boots as she walked to her favorite park a week later. Christmas day for non-Jews and other non-Christian religions, Rachel thought. To her? Just a quiet day where she could wander around a peaceful Lima and smile at the adorable reindeer and pretty colored lights adorning the neighborhood’s houses.
She sniffed against the chilly wind that had kicked up on an otherwise calm, cloudy day as she adjusted the strap of her duffle bag higher on her shoulder. Rachel reached the park and immediately made her way over to the swing-sets. After brushing some snow off of both of the seats, Rachel sat on one and began gently swinging.
“Hey,” a familiar voice said, ghosting through the wind as the swing next to Rachel moved in the breeze.
Rachel turned her head to the right, her yellow beret dipping low on her head before she pushed it back up with a thumb. “Merry Christmas, Quinn.”
“Merry Christmas, Rachel,” Quinn returned as Rachel felt the familiar pins and needles wash over her right side. She leaned her head into it and smiled as she closed her eyes, imagining the hug. When the tingling left, Rachel stuck her hand out towards the swing next to her and groped the air before her right hand started tingling. Quinn touched her hand.
“Today’s an off day, I see,” Rachel said sadly as she stared at Quinn.
There was a beat of silence where Rachel imagined Quinn nodding. “Looks that way,” the blond said, “That’s okay, though. It’s Christmas, you know? This is the first year that the house has had lights and a tree and everything,” Quinn said silently, ending in a whisper, and Rachel could imagine the accompanied shrug that went with that statement.
“I enjoyed doing that with you though, you know,” Rachel said as she smiled at the memory of her dragging a fir tree into the Fabray household in the dead of night with Leroy’s help and Quinn and Hiram shouting orders from inside the house.
Quinn laughed loudly and Rachel reflexively smiled. “That was wonderful, especially when you got lost in the tree on the way in.”
“Yes, hilarious,” Rachel deadpanned as she rolled her eyes while cracking a small smile, “Speaking of, my fathers gave me permission to stay over tonight.”
Quinn was silent and Rachel turned her head and furrowed her brows. “Unless you’ve changed your mind and wish to-”
“No, no it’s not that,” Quinn quickly cut in, “it’s just weird to think that exactly a week ago I was telling you that I was planning on moving on and now here we are.”
“Here we are,” Rachel whispered as the chill of the air made her breath swirl in front of her. She thought back on how she had sobbed in the bathroom and how Quinn had held her. How Rachel hadn’t been able to say to Quinn what she had wanted to, what she knew would keep Quinn with her. But it had been like Quinn had heard it anyway, because she stayed with Rachel all day. And then came back the next day. And then answered the door two days later when Rachel came knocking.
It was like Quinn had understood what Rachel hadn’t been ready to say, and by Quinn sticking around, it had been like Quinn’s heart had said it back.
The brunette cleared her throat and shook her head. “None of that, now, come on! It’s Christmas day, a jolly day, indeed. It may be a non-solid day for you, but I consider it a - what do you call it? - Christmas miracle, that’s it, that you are still having solid days. Let’s head to your house now. I’ll build a fire and put on It’s A Wonderful Life and you can open your present.”
She heard a groan from next to her. “Seriously? You’re going to force me to watch a movie about a man who is basically turned into a ghost. And wait, I told you not to get me anything.”
Rachel rolled her eyes as she hopped off of the swing and stopped Quinn’s swing from blowing in the wind so the ghost could get off (even if that was undoubtedly unnecessary). “I’m making you watch a timeless classic, Quinn. I’m appalled that you, being the big classic movie buff, haven’t seen it yet,” she said, ignoring the present part of Quinn’s statement.
“I tend to avoid movies that remind me of my own existence,” Quinn said from next to Rachel as they fell into step together as they made their way to Quinn’s.
“That’s certainly no excuse, Quinn,” Rachel said, ignoring the snort of amusement from next to her. “Besides, I’ve never celebrated Christmas, so of course I Googled it and made a PowerPoint on the proper methods.”
“Of course you did,” Quinn responded blandly, “Please tell me you don’t have any fruit cake on you.”
Rachel let out a “Pfft” followed by a quick, nervous laugh as her eyes darted down to her duffle bag and then back to the sidewalk in front of her, “Nonsense.”
There was a loud groan from Quinn as the familiar cherry tree, now covered in snow, came into view. Rachel stifled a giggle as they made their way up the front steps and she opened the door, holding it open for Quinn so the ghost didn’t have to walk through it.
“Thanks,” was whispered into the air as Rachel nodded and shut the door behind herself as she walked in after Quinn.
The Fabray house had been decorated, indeed. It had been Rachel’s idea, days after Quinn had decided to stick around, to give Quinn a proper Christmas. It hadn’t even occurred to her until four days before Christmas, when she saw a TV program about a dancing snowman, that Quinn hadn’t had anyone to celebrate Christmas with in ten years, and how lonely that must of made her feel. Once Rachel had thoroughly researched the holiday and drawn up a PowerPoint, she presented her ideas to her fathers. They had readily agreed and helped Rachel show up at Quinn’s with the biggest Christmas tree that the Berry’s could find. Admittedly, a nine foot tall fir tree had been a bit much, but Rachel had insisted only the best for Quinn.
After the tree had been placed and Quinn had reluctantly shown them where the other decorations were, the Berry’s made a night and day of adorning the Fabray house. If the neighbors questioned why the only Jewish, gay male couple in town and their 5’2” daughter had gone out at midnight and comically hung up lights on the Fabray house while singing classics such as Jingle Bells and Deck the House, they didn’t show it.
It took Rachel falling off of the roof once to decide she was better fit to decorate the inside with Quinn. And decorate she did. There were golden and silver lights strung up around the entire house, mixed with wreaths and holly. Little animated Santas and reindeer statues were neatly placed around the house. The regular (non-used) silverware and plates were replaced with Christmas (non-used) silverware and plates.
The Christmas tree itself had been decorated by both Rachel and Quinn on a day where Quinn had been solid. The girls had taken turns hanging up the many Christmas ornaments after Quinn had strung the colored lights onto it. Rachel had asked Quinn what the story behind each ornament was, and so Quinn told the stories behind each as best as she could remember.
Rachel had also saved the putting up of the manger for when Quinn had been solid, and she pretended to not notice the tears that laced Quinn’s voice as the blond had thanked her for the gesture.
As the girls walked into the highly decorated house, Rachel smiled. While she didn’t celebrate Christmas, she had to admit that the decorations were beautiful. “Do you want anything to drink?” Quinn asked her from in the kitchen, “You still have your almond milk crap in my fridge and some other fruit, water drink things.”
Rachel rolled her eyes as she locked the front door and shrugged out of her red pea coat a took off her yellow beanie, hanging them both on the coat hanger. She slipped out of her pink boots and set her duffle bag by them before padding in her socks towards the kitchen.
Rachel stopped when something in the living room caught her gaze.
There were three presents under the Christmas tree, instead of just the one from Rachel. The curious brunette turned and headed into the living room instead of the kitchen and bent down to inspect the tags. Rachel clutched at her chest as tears welled up in her eyes. Under Quinn’s Christmas tree sat the present from her, as she had placed it, and two new ones. To Quinn, Love Leroy; To Quinnie, Love Hiram. “I love you, both,” the brunette whispered out loud before she jumped a little.
“Are those-” she heard from behind her. Rachel nodded as she turned to smile up at Quinn with teary eyes.
“From my fathers? Yes, they are. Actually….” Rachel trailed off, straightening up and biting her lip. “There’s one more, as well.” Quinn sighed and said something about not needing any presents as Rachel moved past her to the duffle bag by the doorway. That morning, when she had gotten up and was getting ready to go, there had been a knock at the Berry door.
When Rachel was called down she was met with Puck standing there, shifting his weight from one foot to another as he nervously clutched a good sized package wrapped in newspaper. “Can you give this to her?” was all that he had said before briefly hugging Rachel and briskly walking away before he could be rejected. As if Rachel would’ve rejected it.
She pulled the package out of her bag and placed it under the tree, the silence in the air heavy.
“This is from Noah,” Rachel said evenly, slowly, as she kept her gaze on the present.
She hadn’t told Quinn about her encounter with him before and she certainly hadn’t told Quinn that she was friends (and had dated) the younger brother of the boy that had killed her.
“By Noah I assume you mean Puck,” Quinn said.
“Yes,” Rachel breathed out, "you know-"
A patch of frigid air passed by Rachel as Quinn moved in closer to the present before speaking, “I know who he is, and I knew about you two, Rachel, if that’s what you’re nervous about. I’m not a moron, I remember him from when he was younger. He was a cool kid,” she finished and then added, “I’m not mad that you know. I’m…glad that he remembers me and believes you.”
Rachel moved her gaze to Quinn’s face, “You’re really not mad?”
“I’m relieved someone remembers me,” was the quiet answer Rachel received.
“If it were up to me, Quinn, everyone in the town would know of your existence,” Rachel stated firmly, reaching out until she felt a tingling sensation in her hand.
“I’m pretty content with just you and a few others knowing, Rach,” Quinn said with a laugh, “but I’m just…shocked that people cared enough, you know? These presents…they’re more than I’ve had in.…”
Rachel heard Quinn begin to choke up and she immediately pulled Quinn close to her, not even being affected by the fact that something had changed in the air and Quinn was solid again. Rachel hugged Quinn and allowed the blond to cry into her shoulder as she rubbed her back. Quinn was switching from solid to non-solid at the blink of an eye those days, so it was nothing for Rachel to automatically gravitate to the blond when she was about to turn solid again.
Rachel let Quinn cry until there were no more dry tears in the ghost’s body.
----------
For the first time in ten years, Quinn was celebrating Christmas. She just hadn’t allowed herself to before because, really, what did she have to celebrate? That year Quinn had something to celebrate, though. She had a reason to smile at the twinkling colored lights on her house and a reason to sing along with the Christmas music coming from her favorite wind-up Santa.
Late that evening, the ghost gazed at Rachel, in a green and red reindeer sweater, sitting on the floor with Quinn’s wrapped presents in front of her with the TV behind her blaring Christmas Vacation and scrunching her nose up in contempt at every curse word from Chevy Chase’s mouth. Quinn cocked her head as the fireplace from across the room shone light on Rachel’s gorgeous features. Rachel looked up at where she knew Quinn was, and smiled. Quinn smiled back.
“Come open your presents, Quinn.” And so she did. Quinn opened Hiram’s gift of about a dozen classic books that she had mentioned in passing to Rachel once about her wanting to read them. That made her cry. She then opened Leroy’s gift and carefully read the title of the twenty classic horror films that the man had given her. Once again, she cried. Tentatively, Quinn opened Puck’s present, and Rachel scooted a little closer to Quinn as she opened it. Once the newspaper wrapping was torn away, Quinn ran her fingers over the material of her varsity Cheerio jacket from high school. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she looked up at Rachel, who also had tears in her eyes as she saw the word ‘Fabray’ printed on the back.
“He stole this from me a few days before the crash,” Quinn explained, “he had a crush on me and half of the time he and I got along better than Michael and I did. He promised he’d give me it back when he was old enough to date me. I remember calling him a little shit and making him promise to not make any voodoo dolls out of the material,” she finished with a laugh.
Rachel had tears in her eyes, Quinn noticed, but a smile on her face. “That sounds like Noah,” she said, “I just can’t believe he kept it.”
“I can,” Quinn said while nodding, “he was little, but we were friends. He probably felt like he had to keep it to keep the promise.” She saw Rachel nod her head and bite her lip, and Quinn got an idea.
The blond leaned over and placed the jacket on Rachel’s shoulders. Rachel whipped her head and stared at Quinn with her huge, shocked, brown eyes. Quinn smiled. “It looks better on you.”
Rachel nodded her head numbly as she pulled the jacket off of her shoulders and turned it over in her hands. Quinn couldn’t explain the tightening in her chest as Rachel ran her fingers over Quinn’s last name on the back. “Merry Christmas, Rachel,” Quinn said in an attempt to break the silence.
“Thank you, Quinn,” Rachel said through tears. Quinn couldn’t remember the last time she’d had such an emotional Christmas.
Finally, Quinn opened Rachel’s present and gasped. “You got me a record player,” she said in shock as she carefully lifted the machine out of the box.
“I was having the hardest time figuring out what to get you,” Rachel admitted, “Until I saw all of the records up in the attic here in a giant box with your name printed on it. I’m sure I wasn’t actually supposed to open it but of course I did anyway, and I was shocked at what I found. However, I couldn’t find a record player to play it on, and trust me, I scoured the entire house.”
Quinn laughed at Rachel’s bluntness as she ran her hand over the old player before cocking her eyebrow in realization. “This is yours.”
“It is,” Rachel agreed, “along with all of the vinyl at the bottom of that box.”
Quinn stared at Rachel in shock before looking into the box and seeing, just as Rachel said, dozens of records. “Also,” Rachel added, “I brought down all of yours from the attic and cleaned them all up. Now, they’re all organized in the empty cabinet space under the TV. I left space for your movies and books there, as well.”
Quinn’s vision was blurry as she finally tore her gaze from the vinyl and over to Rachel’s face. “How did you-”
“You love music, Quinn, almost as much as I do, which I didn’t think was possible. I figured someone like you wouldn’t have all of those albums unless they truly loved them, and to not have something to play them on is a shame in itself.”
“But this is yours Rach and now-”
“And now it’s where it belongs, it's home,” Rachel finished for Quinn, her eyebrows raised and nodding to reaffirm her point.
Quinn took one look at Rachel, now wearing her old varsity jacket before looking down at the record player on her lap. She looked around at the lights in the house and the blaring TV, into the kitchen across the hall with food on the counter and then over to the roaring fire. She was suddenly overcome with something strong, something powerful enough to cause huge sobs to wrack through her body, something that felt similar to a heart beating in her chest, hard.
As if Rachel knew, as if they'd done it a million times before, she reached over and placed her hand on the back of Quinn’s neck and drew her in for a brief kiss. This was home, Quinn thought. The house she had been hiding from the world in for ten years was finally a home. Her home. With Rachel there, with the life Rachel had brought into it, it was finally a home. Quinn ignored the ever darkening bags under the Rachel’s eyes and the nagging fear at the back of her mind as she leaned over and kissed Rachel again, tugging at her bottom lip with both of her own.
She had someone who remembered her, two men who cared about her, and a girl who (Quinn hoped to God) loved her. Quinn hoped to God that Rachel loved her, because Quinn had never loved someone more in her life than she loved Rachel. Maybe she couldn’t always protect Rachel, but she could love her. For then, that was enough.