As Time Goes By
Title: As Time Goes By
Fandom: Big Time Rush
Character: Camille/James/Logan
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1893
Summary: Logan wasn't surprised when he learned that Camille kissed James. Girls are always kissing James, after all, and Camille is always kissing boys. So it makes sense, in a weird sort of way.
A.N.: As Time Goes By is a song by Herman Hupfeld. Also: A million and a half thanks to queenitsy for all her help. <3
Camille didn't mean to kiss James. It wasn't a plan. It just sort of... happened.
Camille didn't mind it while it was happening. How could she? Kissing James is like holding a star in the palm of your hand -- everything goes all tingly and bright. But she certainly minded it after it ended, when her brain started functioning again. Because kissing James pretty much meant the end of kissing Logan. Which is pretty much the worse thing ever because kissing Logan is like coming home.
And while tingly and bright is perfectly lovely, it has nothing on coming home.
*
Logan wasn't surprised when he learned that Camille kissed James. Girls are always kissing James, after all, and Camille is always kissing boys. So it makes sense, in a weird sort of way.
Logan can’t even blame her for wanting to kiss James. He’s wanted to kiss James before. Everyone does, at one time or another. It’s just how things are.
That's not to say that Logan isn't hurt by it. He is. A lot. Because Camille is pretty much the only girl he's ever been interested in kissing. In fact, he's pretty sure that Camille is the only girl he will ever be interested in kissing.
But he is smart enough to know that just because he feels that way doesn't mean that Camille does. They are both very young, after all, and Camille... Well, Camille is young in ways he never has been. And so he's willing to let her go, let her try someone else out.
Although that didn’t make it sting any less when he saw her with Steve after they broke up. But if moving on is what makes Camille happy, if that is what she want, then who is he to say no?
Because when you love something, you let it go. Right?
*
James didn't stop to think before he kissed Camille because James never stops to think. If he had, he would have known it was a very bad, horrible idea and wouldn’t have done it at all. Instead he just went with his gut, grabbed at his chance -- the chance he had been secretly hating himself for wanting. And grabbing it like that ruined everything.
And the worst part is that James doesn't know how to fix it.
James should just be grateful that Logan still talks to him and that Camille doesn't hate him and that things seem fine, but he can't be. Not when he knows in his bones that Logan and Camille are more than just hand holding and make out sessions. There's so much more to them than that. When James looks that them, he sees forever. And forever shouldn't disappear because he ruined it.
So James does something he never does: he thinks. And he plots and he plans. Because there is no way he's going to be the reason Logan and Camille don't get their happy ending.
*
Camille isn't sure what to expect when James asks her to meet him on the roof. She hasn’t been avoiding him or anything, but she hasn’t really seen much of him since the kiss that should never have happened and that made Logan's eyes go all sad and that totally ruined everything.
And it’s not that she’s upset about not seeing him around as much, because things were hard enough after all of that and having James be around all the time would have just complicated everything so much more. Besides, some things are better left alone. But, well, she sort of expected him to be... Camille isn’t sure how she expected him to be, but it definitely is not the everything’s-fine-we’re-just-friends-nothing-happened way he has been acting.
Not that he should be acting differently. Or that Camille had wanted him to declare unspoken feelings or anything like that. It’s just that her emotions are all hopelessly muddled now. And, really, she wishes that it hadn’t happened and they could all go back to the way things were. And wishing that is almost enough to make her turn around and take the elevator back to her room.
But she doesn't. Because James wasn't the only one who took part in that kiss and avoiding the issue hasn’t helped at all.
So she opens the door, walks out into the late afternoon sun and instantly wishes that she hadn't. Because James isn't the only one on the roof waiting for her.
Logan's on it, too.
*
Logan isn't surprised when James drags him up to the roof. James dragging him places is par for the course, as far as their friendship is concerned. Or at least it was before everything happened and James started walking around with that wounded puppy look in his eyes.
The reason Logan doesn't object to being dragged off by James is that it might just be a sign that things are getting better between them, and their friendship might be getting back on track. But he should have known better. Because the second they get up there, James starts darting panic-filled looks at the door and completely ignores all of Logan's attempts at conversation.
Now, Logan will overlook at lot of things for the sake of his friendship with James, as recent events clearly show, but standing about on an empty roof while the sun beats down on his head and James acts all twitchy isn't one of them. He's about to say as much when the door to the roof opens and Camille walks out.
For a long moment the world stops spinning.
When it starts back up again, Logan isn't certain that he and James will still be friends anymore when whatever is going on is over.
*
James sees Logan freeze and doesn't even need to glance over his shoulder to know that Camille has joined them on the roof. Not when Logan's got that odd mixture of longing and hurt in his eyes. James takes a deep breath and then springs into action, not giving himself time to think.
If he did, he would probably panic and not be able to go through with his plan. And not following his plan would ruin everything.
So instead of thinking, James grabs hold of Logan's shirt and tugs him close enough to kiss. And then he does. Because if a kiss can ruin things, it can fix them too. Right?
James kisses Logan long enough for Logan to go from stiff and surprised to ... almost eager. And god, when he turns eager, James' skin starts to sizzle.
Turns out that kissing Logan is amazing. Way better than James ever fantasized about it being. Almost as good as kissing Camille, and kissing Camille was pretty much the height of kissing, as far as James is concerned.
Logan moans when James pulls back and his hand clutches at James' hips. James is tempted to dive back in, but this isn't about him and what he wants. It's about Logan and Camille and fixing something precious. So he disentangles himself, steps back and tries to catch his breath.
"You're even now," he says.
*
"That is the hottest thing I've ever seen," Camille says, then slaps a hand over her mouth.
Camille didn't mean to say it, for all she'd been thinking it since James grabbed Logan and wow. It just sort of... slipped out.
And now she sorta wants to die. Because the look Logan is giving her is one she's never seen before and James' eyes are twinkling in that way that means he's about to burst out laughing and she knows her cheeks are red as fire engines and no amount of acting is going to get her out of this one. She can tell.
It's bad enough that Logan broke up with her. Bad enough she can’t seem to move on, even though he’s clearly told her that she needs to. She doesn't need him thinking she's some sort of perv on top of it.
Which is why she is caught completely off guard when he closes the space between them, tugs her into his arms and kisses her like they just saved the world.
Camille lets her eyes flutter shut, wraps her arms around his neck, tangles her fingers in his hair, and kisses him back for all she's worth. Because kissing Logan is like coming home, and coming home like this is something she never thought she could do again.
*
Kissing Camille is as natural as breathing and, as far as Logan is concerned, as necessary as breathing, too.
And kissing Camille, well that’s something he always knew he would do again, given half a change. But having her kiss him back? That shocks and amazes him. Because last time he checked she was off exploring other options while he bitterly regretted not giving her another chance.
He's still not sure what is going on, why James thought that this was the best way to right wrongs, but right now he doesn't really care. Not when it means that Camille is melting in his arms and James his finally smiling again and everything it right in the world.
When Camille breaks the kiss, he is a little bit disappointed. Logan is sure that explanations and confessions and other unpleasantly awkward conversations will now begin. But that doesn't happen. Instead Camille just smiles a siren's smile at him, then snakes an arm out and pulls James close.
"Do it again," she whispers, her eyes dancing with eager anticipation.
Logan licks his lips and looks at James. Really looks at him for the first time in he doesn't know how long. There in James’ eyes, Logan sees a mix of wistfulness and longing that hits him the gut. And that most surprising thing of all.
*
Logan studies James' face long enough for James to start to get worried. Really worried. He opens his mouth to say who knows what, but is cut off by Logan's lips pressing gently against his.
Now, James isn't known for his thinking, but there is something about this kiss that makes his brain perk up and take notice.
Maybe it's the fact that Logan's hand is cupping his check. Maybe it's the soft, sweet movement of Logan's mouth against his own. Maybe it's the way Logan’s teeth feel as they nip at his bottom lip, gentle but demanding.
Whatever it is, James can't get enough of it.
He tugs at Logan's hips, trying to get closer, and as he does his hand brushes across Camille's stomach. She lets out a gasp and before he knows what he's doing, James has an arm around her and is nibbling on her neck while Logan murmurs encouraging things in his ear.
And that's when James feels it, that sense of belonging. Like he's somehow managed to latch onto that forever Logan and Camille have going on.
Fandom: Big Time Rush
Character: Camille/James/Logan
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1893
Summary: Logan wasn't surprised when he learned that Camille kissed James. Girls are always kissing James, after all, and Camille is always kissing boys. So it makes sense, in a weird sort of way.
A.N.: As Time Goes By is a song by Herman Hupfeld. Also: A million and a half thanks to queenitsy for all her help. <3
Camille didn't mean to kiss James. It wasn't a plan. It just sort of... happened.
Camille didn't mind it while it was happening. How could she? Kissing James is like holding a star in the palm of your hand -- everything goes all tingly and bright. But she certainly minded it after it ended, when her brain started functioning again. Because kissing James pretty much meant the end of kissing Logan. Which is pretty much the worse thing ever because kissing Logan is like coming home.
And while tingly and bright is perfectly lovely, it has nothing on coming home.
*
Logan wasn't surprised when he learned that Camille kissed James. Girls are always kissing James, after all, and Camille is always kissing boys. So it makes sense, in a weird sort of way.
Logan can’t even blame her for wanting to kiss James. He’s wanted to kiss James before. Everyone does, at one time or another. It’s just how things are.
That's not to say that Logan isn't hurt by it. He is. A lot. Because Camille is pretty much the only girl he's ever been interested in kissing. In fact, he's pretty sure that Camille is the only girl he will ever be interested in kissing.
But he is smart enough to know that just because he feels that way doesn't mean that Camille does. They are both very young, after all, and Camille... Well, Camille is young in ways he never has been. And so he's willing to let her go, let her try someone else out.
Although that didn’t make it sting any less when he saw her with Steve after they broke up. But if moving on is what makes Camille happy, if that is what she want, then who is he to say no?
Because when you love something, you let it go. Right?
*
James didn't stop to think before he kissed Camille because James never stops to think. If he had, he would have known it was a very bad, horrible idea and wouldn’t have done it at all. Instead he just went with his gut, grabbed at his chance -- the chance he had been secretly hating himself for wanting. And grabbing it like that ruined everything.
And the worst part is that James doesn't know how to fix it.
James should just be grateful that Logan still talks to him and that Camille doesn't hate him and that things seem fine, but he can't be. Not when he knows in his bones that Logan and Camille are more than just hand holding and make out sessions. There's so much more to them than that. When James looks that them, he sees forever. And forever shouldn't disappear because he ruined it.
So James does something he never does: he thinks. And he plots and he plans. Because there is no way he's going to be the reason Logan and Camille don't get their happy ending.
*
Camille isn't sure what to expect when James asks her to meet him on the roof. She hasn’t been avoiding him or anything, but she hasn’t really seen much of him since the kiss that should never have happened and that made Logan's eyes go all sad and that totally ruined everything.
And it’s not that she’s upset about not seeing him around as much, because things were hard enough after all of that and having James be around all the time would have just complicated everything so much more. Besides, some things are better left alone. But, well, she sort of expected him to be... Camille isn’t sure how she expected him to be, but it definitely is not the everything’s-fine-we’re-just-friends-nothing-happened way he has been acting.
Not that he should be acting differently. Or that Camille had wanted him to declare unspoken feelings or anything like that. It’s just that her emotions are all hopelessly muddled now. And, really, she wishes that it hadn’t happened and they could all go back to the way things were. And wishing that is almost enough to make her turn around and take the elevator back to her room.
But she doesn't. Because James wasn't the only one who took part in that kiss and avoiding the issue hasn’t helped at all.
So she opens the door, walks out into the late afternoon sun and instantly wishes that she hadn't. Because James isn't the only one on the roof waiting for her.
Logan's on it, too.
*
Logan isn't surprised when James drags him up to the roof. James dragging him places is par for the course, as far as their friendship is concerned. Or at least it was before everything happened and James started walking around with that wounded puppy look in his eyes.
The reason Logan doesn't object to being dragged off by James is that it might just be a sign that things are getting better between them, and their friendship might be getting back on track. But he should have known better. Because the second they get up there, James starts darting panic-filled looks at the door and completely ignores all of Logan's attempts at conversation.
Now, Logan will overlook at lot of things for the sake of his friendship with James, as recent events clearly show, but standing about on an empty roof while the sun beats down on his head and James acts all twitchy isn't one of them. He's about to say as much when the door to the roof opens and Camille walks out.
For a long moment the world stops spinning.
When it starts back up again, Logan isn't certain that he and James will still be friends anymore when whatever is going on is over.
*
James sees Logan freeze and doesn't even need to glance over his shoulder to know that Camille has joined them on the roof. Not when Logan's got that odd mixture of longing and hurt in his eyes. James takes a deep breath and then springs into action, not giving himself time to think.
If he did, he would probably panic and not be able to go through with his plan. And not following his plan would ruin everything.
So instead of thinking, James grabs hold of Logan's shirt and tugs him close enough to kiss. And then he does. Because if a kiss can ruin things, it can fix them too. Right?
James kisses Logan long enough for Logan to go from stiff and surprised to ... almost eager. And god, when he turns eager, James' skin starts to sizzle.
Turns out that kissing Logan is amazing. Way better than James ever fantasized about it being. Almost as good as kissing Camille, and kissing Camille was pretty much the height of kissing, as far as James is concerned.
Logan moans when James pulls back and his hand clutches at James' hips. James is tempted to dive back in, but this isn't about him and what he wants. It's about Logan and Camille and fixing something precious. So he disentangles himself, steps back and tries to catch his breath.
"You're even now," he says.
*
"That is the hottest thing I've ever seen," Camille says, then slaps a hand over her mouth.
Camille didn't mean to say it, for all she'd been thinking it since James grabbed Logan and wow. It just sort of... slipped out.
And now she sorta wants to die. Because the look Logan is giving her is one she's never seen before and James' eyes are twinkling in that way that means he's about to burst out laughing and she knows her cheeks are red as fire engines and no amount of acting is going to get her out of this one. She can tell.
It's bad enough that Logan broke up with her. Bad enough she can’t seem to move on, even though he’s clearly told her that she needs to. She doesn't need him thinking she's some sort of perv on top of it.
Which is why she is caught completely off guard when he closes the space between them, tugs her into his arms and kisses her like they just saved the world.
Camille lets her eyes flutter shut, wraps her arms around his neck, tangles her fingers in his hair, and kisses him back for all she's worth. Because kissing Logan is like coming home, and coming home like this is something she never thought she could do again.
*
Kissing Camille is as natural as breathing and, as far as Logan is concerned, as necessary as breathing, too.
And kissing Camille, well that’s something he always knew he would do again, given half a change. But having her kiss him back? That shocks and amazes him. Because last time he checked she was off exploring other options while he bitterly regretted not giving her another chance.
He's still not sure what is going on, why James thought that this was the best way to right wrongs, but right now he doesn't really care. Not when it means that Camille is melting in his arms and James his finally smiling again and everything it right in the world.
When Camille breaks the kiss, he is a little bit disappointed. Logan is sure that explanations and confessions and other unpleasantly awkward conversations will now begin. But that doesn't happen. Instead Camille just smiles a siren's smile at him, then snakes an arm out and pulls James close.
"Do it again," she whispers, her eyes dancing with eager anticipation.
Logan licks his lips and looks at James. Really looks at him for the first time in he doesn't know how long. There in James’ eyes, Logan sees a mix of wistfulness and longing that hits him the gut. And that most surprising thing of all.
*
Logan studies James' face long enough for James to start to get worried. Really worried. He opens his mouth to say who knows what, but is cut off by Logan's lips pressing gently against his.
Now, James isn't known for his thinking, but there is something about this kiss that makes his brain perk up and take notice.
Maybe it's the fact that Logan's hand is cupping his check. Maybe it's the soft, sweet movement of Logan's mouth against his own. Maybe it's the way Logan’s teeth feel as they nip at his bottom lip, gentle but demanding.
Whatever it is, James can't get enough of it.
He tugs at Logan's hips, trying to get closer, and as he does his hand brushes across Camille's stomach. She lets out a gasp and before he knows what he's doing, James has an arm around her and is nibbling on her neck while Logan murmurs encouraging things in his ear.
And that's when James feels it, that sense of belonging. Like he's somehow managed to latch onto that forever Logan and Camille have going on.