The Ghost of Christmas Past and Future

[lick_of_flame]

When they had told him, he'd been staring out the window of the baby's room. Imagining being home, imagining the snow that would be falling if he were back home. Fucked if he knew why he was still here. Cali-fucking-fornia. Only reason he stayed was in this very room. Or had been in this room

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[viv_ward]

Vivian had known for a while who her husband was, she'd acquired the information partly through Hallenbeck and partly through Snake. The latter costing her her engagement ring. But what did that matter? It didn't mean anything to her, there was no sentimental value in a ring that a man she didn't even remember had given her. None at all, at least that's what she'd told herself. And if she didn't stay, he'd promised her he'd give her half of its worth back. She hadn't believed that, she'd thrown away her chance of actually starting over with money, for this information, for this address. For a vain hope that maybe, just maybe she'd married this man because she loved him

[lick_of_flame]

Books are generally bullshit. People didn't think like that, no one felt like what some fucking writer had put on a piece of paper to describe a so-called emotion. But damned if he wasn't doing it right now, drinking in the sight of her, feeling his heart beat harder, hearing the thumping in his ears, rhythmic, and loud.

It was her, or one hell of a goddamned good imitation. No, he knew better. It was her, Vivian. He knew it, he felt it. He believed, he wanted so hard to believe. But, why? Why now, why here? Just disappear off the earth, and suddenly appear on Christmas fucking eve, right on his - their - doorstep

[viv_ward]

It was almost ironic that the voice coming from the intercom shocked her, if she'd remembered anything at all, then she'd remember how it was practically tradition for him to catch her unawares, sneak up on her when she was least expecting it. Despite his best attempts to ease her in gently, she jumped as the distorted voice came through resonant and crackly, that all too familiar laugh of hers ringing out to cover her surprise. Nervous, jumpy, self deprecatory, the laugh she gave to make people think she was in control and it did nothing to disguise her unease, regardless of its intent. It over compensated, it always had, and it was as transparent as her sass or hard nosed act.

Vivian was clean, well as clean as you can get given her status in life. Yeah, she took the odd line of coke when it was offered, but she didn't squander her own hard earned precious cash on it. If it was offered, then she took it, but she didn't seek it out anymore, and she couldn't actually recall ever having taken heroin. But she knew she had, there

[lick_of_flame]

"He might know you" Came the answer, a few long seconds later

[viv_ward]

"Late, yeah, I guess it is." She had no idea how late it was, she'd spent most of the day in a daze, thinking, procrastinating, wondering. And then tonight, she had no idea that the hours had slipped by as she'd wandered. Not even enough cash for a cab here. She wasn't even sure this had been where she was heading, but the chill of the night air and the streets of fairy lit houses had somehow led her here. It could have been three in the morning, nine o'clock, time had been insignificant, her head full of 'what if's', clinging to the vain hope that there was something worthwhile salvaging here, worth seeking out

[lick_of_flame]

So close, he didn't move, didn't dare to move, didn't dare to breathe as she came close, close enough and reached out to take his hand. Carefully, gently his fingers curved around hers, drawing her to him. And still he did not blink, not until she was close enough to hold, to curl into his arms if he wanted it. But he held off, holding only onto her fingertips as he spun behind her, his body heat warm to her back

[viv_ward]

Did she even hear everything he said? Twice she caught herself bringing her focus back in to listen to his words, entire sections missed despite her nods of agreement and nervous smiles. This man, her husband, the house - everything seemed to be happening to her, like she was drifting along in some dream and none of it was real and she had no say in the ending.

It didn't occur to her that she could turn around or change her mind. She had to know. Everything about him mesmerised her, from the curve of his nose to the shine of his hair. She must have kissed those lips. She found herself considering the swell of his bottom lip, scrutinising it almost. Did he know? Is that why he mentioned them? Had she once refused them, why had she changed her mind

[lick_of_flame]

"It's easy to clean, if you know how. Everything is easy Vivian, if you know the way." His breathe blew over her head, ruffling the top of her hair. "And if you like lights, we can light this place up so bright the fucking stars can see it."

Was there a tree, well as a matter of fact there was. A large one, and he'd paid out the ass to have a decorator come make it all sparkly and shit. Had to keep up appearances. Now Top was glad that he had actually gone ahead and gotten the tree, gotten the candles and the strands of lights.

"Its not a store. Its a castle. Your castle, Cinderella." His arms wanted to hold her close to his chest, the desire was so strong just to crush her to him. But he held back, held on. Held control. Hard as it fucking was, he absolutely had to keep in control, not to frighten her away, not to lose her again.

"Welcome home." My love.