On Wedding Etiquette
A couple of couples of my LJ pals are getting married (namely, jeltzz earthminorque et dogs_n_rodents mjhansenque) * very soon.
Reading dogs_n_rodents recent stresses -- which I admit seem far worse than mine own -- reminds me of how terrible a thing wedding planning -- which should be a joyous occasion -- can be. My poor wife is still affected by it to the point of having difficulty remembering the good things about our wedding. (As for me, seeing her enter the hall as if an elven maiden out of magical mist to Enya's "Aniron" is enough to clear my recall of most of the stressful emotions from planning -- at least until reading dogs_n_rodents's entries.)
Anyhow, I speak specifically about wedding etiquette, but my thoughts can pretty much apply to any etiquette in general.
And it turns out that I actually wrote on this topic before while I was in the midst of wedding planning. I might as well just self-plagiarize:...Because I think that in many cases, formality and etiquette replace the immature aspects of "coolness" -- namely, the frivolous trendiness. But etiquette is longer lasting in its trends.
I hinted [in the past][1] that perhaps being an adult is realizing what is important and what is frivolous.
Perhaps this is why I am thoroughly bothered by pressures to "be an adult" when these supposedly "adult" things are nothing more than foolish trends to gain the approval of others.
Since I was very little, I found etiquette stupid. My feelings on the topic have little changed.
...Somehow, because... invitations... have black in them (*gasp!*), are we less adult? Does it really matter whether one uses Pastor or The Reverend as a title? Does the wedding cake knife really need a flower on it? Do the groomsmen have to wear ugly flowers?
How is this insistence on following pointless traditions adult?
I am sure that etiquette began -- like many things -- with good intentions. It was trying to make everyone feel as comfortable as possible. I'm sorry, but if whether I call you Dr. or Doctor L. on an envelope is really of importance to you, you have some serious issues.
And who the heck decides this stuff? No one ever agrees on it. It's constantly changing. It's this strange mash of overly traditional mixed with "he said/she said" nonsense.
Sorry for what is essentially a repeat entry....
*Don't you wish that English had two different additive conjunctions as Greek and Latin do? It would be so much more useful as a language. Stupid English.
Reading dogs_n_rodents recent stresses -- which I admit seem far worse than mine own -- reminds me of how terrible a thing wedding planning -- which should be a joyous occasion -- can be. My poor wife is still affected by it to the point of having difficulty remembering the good things about our wedding. (As for me, seeing her enter the hall as if an elven maiden out of magical mist to Enya's "Aniron" is enough to clear my recall of most of the stressful emotions from planning -- at least until reading dogs_n_rodents's entries.)
Anyhow, I speak specifically about wedding etiquette, but my thoughts can pretty much apply to any etiquette in general.
And it turns out that I actually wrote on this topic before while I was in the midst of wedding planning. I might as well just self-plagiarize:...Because I think that in many cases, formality and etiquette replace the immature aspects of "coolness" -- namely, the frivolous trendiness. But etiquette is longer lasting in its trends.
I hinted [in the past][1] that perhaps being an adult is realizing what is important and what is frivolous.
Perhaps this is why I am thoroughly bothered by pressures to "be an adult" when these supposedly "adult" things are nothing more than foolish trends to gain the approval of others.
Since I was very little, I found etiquette stupid. My feelings on the topic have little changed.
...Somehow, because... invitations... have black in them (*gasp!*), are we less adult? Does it really matter whether one uses Pastor or The Reverend as a title? Does the wedding cake knife really need a flower on it? Do the groomsmen have to wear ugly flowers?
How is this insistence on following pointless traditions adult?
I am sure that etiquette began -- like many things -- with good intentions. It was trying to make everyone feel as comfortable as possible. I'm sorry, but if whether I call you Dr. or Doctor L. on an envelope is really of importance to you, you have some serious issues.
And who the heck decides this stuff? No one ever agrees on it. It's constantly changing. It's this strange mash of overly traditional mixed with "he said/she said" nonsense.
Sorry for what is essentially a repeat entry....
*Don't you wish that English had two different additive conjunctions as Greek and Latin do? It would be so much more useful as a language. Stupid English.