I trusted McGruff, once.
lately, my head is sometimes filled with the strangest sensation. sort of a humming, buzzing, crawling, twisting, writhing, chaotic clusterfuck of indistinct thought. it's like my brain is filled with tiny thought-bees, really. millions. trillions, even. at first, i was fairly sure it was just fatigue, or burnout, or a tumor, an aneurism, or any number of all too pleasing explainations. but i'm pretty sure i'm wrong.
i'm also pretty sure that stupid people are literally driving me insane, and quite possibly killing me.
when i'm not constantly being innundated with madcap retardation ejaculations, it seems to go away. take, for example, my workplace. when i wake up in the morning, i'm admittedly groggy. but that goes away. but as my work day progresses, the mental grog is replaced by those who should actually be named grog. and by the end of the day, excepting days on which it's very slow, and my interaction with staff and patrons is at an absolute minimum, i come home with the same short circuit in my noggin. it's the little things. everytime someone obsessively sanitizes a counter they just cut raw chicken on, and then fails to realize the knife they cut the chicken with might also be a problem, to when another fellow employee, who just happens to be my boss, drops a pan of sausages onto the vile, grease blackened floor, which must look just like tom arnold's crotch, and then instructs me to wash them off, and re-pan them. and it takes a little tiny bit longer to pass everytime. it's not noticeable, until i look at it on a much longer timeline. like, say, over the last ten years. that's about when i can remember something akin to this first happening. right around the time i had a middleschool teacher sabatoge my records, placing me in the "adjusted" class when i entered high school.
so here i am. and i realize, it's finally down to a question of me, or them.
i can't possibly win, but i'm taking as many with me on the way down as i can.
i'm also pretty sure that stupid people are literally driving me insane, and quite possibly killing me.
when i'm not constantly being innundated with madcap retardation ejaculations, it seems to go away. take, for example, my workplace. when i wake up in the morning, i'm admittedly groggy. but that goes away. but as my work day progresses, the mental grog is replaced by those who should actually be named grog. and by the end of the day, excepting days on which it's very slow, and my interaction with staff and patrons is at an absolute minimum, i come home with the same short circuit in my noggin. it's the little things. everytime someone obsessively sanitizes a counter they just cut raw chicken on, and then fails to realize the knife they cut the chicken with might also be a problem, to when another fellow employee, who just happens to be my boss, drops a pan of sausages onto the vile, grease blackened floor, which must look just like tom arnold's crotch, and then instructs me to wash them off, and re-pan them. and it takes a little tiny bit longer to pass everytime. it's not noticeable, until i look at it on a much longer timeline. like, say, over the last ten years. that's about when i can remember something akin to this first happening. right around the time i had a middleschool teacher sabatoge my records, placing me in the "adjusted" class when i entered high school.
so here i am. and i realize, it's finally down to a question of me, or them.
i can't possibly win, but i'm taking as many with me on the way down as i can.