Retrospective
Four months ago I was unmarried. Five months ago I hadn't finished SoGT1. Seven months ago I'd never seen anyone dying. Eight months ago I hadn't even started making up SoGT. Nine months ago I'd never had a friend who died. A year ago I was still obsessed with 7th Sea. Two years ago I didn't know Noelle. Three years ago I was still dating David. Five years ago I was still with Sam.
I don't know how to explain how much has changed this year. It's been a year of transition in all the tarot senses. Time is starting to wash around in my memory. I'm not sure what goes where anymore or how long it's been since anything.
BK is so small in my past compared to some people and so large in my future. It's really strange, to have a thing growing away from me like that without roots. I've always been such a rooted person.
I came up with an explanation, when talking to my mother, for why leaving Sam made me not afraid of heights anymore. It had to do with faith, existential crisis, and Confucianism. Anomie. I'm trying to grow my roots backwards and get a grip again on where I stand, and what it means when there isn't anything under me. I dreamed of stepping forward into sunlight and gold leaves.
I'm really tired and have no idea what I'm talking about. I need to clean house. If I can keep the dishes done and get my room picked up, sanity will follow. Trust me. I study this stuff.
I don't know how to explain how much has changed this year. It's been a year of transition in all the tarot senses. Time is starting to wash around in my memory. I'm not sure what goes where anymore or how long it's been since anything.
BK is so small in my past compared to some people and so large in my future. It's really strange, to have a thing growing away from me like that without roots. I've always been such a rooted person.
I came up with an explanation, when talking to my mother, for why leaving Sam made me not afraid of heights anymore. It had to do with faith, existential crisis, and Confucianism. Anomie. I'm trying to grow my roots backwards and get a grip again on where I stand, and what it means when there isn't anything under me. I dreamed of stepping forward into sunlight and gold leaves.
I'm really tired and have no idea what I'm talking about. I need to clean house. If I can keep the dishes done and get my room picked up, sanity will follow. Trust me. I study this stuff.