Man Bites Man
Couple nights ago I had a talk about "man" as a gender (as opposed to "boy" or "guy"). A young-adult male of my acquaintance expressed discomfort with using it, more as an age thing (I think) than as a gender thing. I said that part of what it means for me to be a "woman" is the adoption of masculine traits--that "woman" and "man" are more similar than "girl" and "boy." (Because both are protective, responsible, and independent. I have an earlier entry about that somewhere.)
So today we watched a video (Frontline on "Inside the Jury Room" or something) about a jury deliberation. I watched as the video and the jury were both sympathetic to the charismatic and rhetorically-skilled defense lawyer and gave pretty much no attention to the bland lawyer for the prosecution. The jury brought back a legally-unjustified-but-emotionally-reasonable verdict of "not guilty." The judge praised juries as a symbol of freedom in the United States. Done, all honor preserved. Well, except for the one juror who thought maybe they should worry about a) the law and b) what happens to the guy after the trial. He reminded me, in fact, of the one guy in the Milgram video who refused to administer "lethal" shocks. (If you don't know about the Milgram obedience experiments, here is the wikipedia article.)
That, my dear, is a man. It's not a personality type I advocate all my friends emulate. In fact, in some circumstances, those guys are jerks. I just recommend carrying the ideal around in your head (whatever your sex and gender), and being willing to bring that guy forward. Sometimes, we all need to be that guy. "Be a man" is terrible advice sometimes--and sometimes it's life and death.
I love gender archetypes. It's a weird hobby of mine.
So today we watched a video (Frontline on "Inside the Jury Room" or something) about a jury deliberation. I watched as the video and the jury were both sympathetic to the charismatic and rhetorically-skilled defense lawyer and gave pretty much no attention to the bland lawyer for the prosecution. The jury brought back a legally-unjustified-but-emotionally-reasonable verdict of "not guilty." The judge praised juries as a symbol of freedom in the United States. Done, all honor preserved. Well, except for the one juror who thought maybe they should worry about a) the law and b) what happens to the guy after the trial. He reminded me, in fact, of the one guy in the Milgram video who refused to administer "lethal" shocks. (If you don't know about the Milgram obedience experiments, here is the wikipedia article.)
That, my dear, is a man. It's not a personality type I advocate all my friends emulate. In fact, in some circumstances, those guys are jerks. I just recommend carrying the ideal around in your head (whatever your sex and gender), and being willing to bring that guy forward. Sometimes, we all need to be that guy. "Be a man" is terrible advice sometimes--and sometimes it's life and death.
I love gender archetypes. It's a weird hobby of mine.