rise of the sick, twisted, perverted lemming
Well, as I said last time, when I posted chapter 3, I am a sick, twisted lemming. I wrote a semi-explicit sex scene between Jay and his younger brother...and neither one minded, though I sorta had to coax Jay into doing it... It's just one scene, but it's six pages long...and will probably end up being most of a chapter later on in the story, because now that I've written it, I've more or less become a little more accepting of its presence in the story. Well, that and Zack threatened mutiny if I didn't give him some more backstory...which is what this is.
Of course, now my brain is saying it wants kitsune in the story...and it really doesn't want to back down on the issue. I think it has something to do with reading all there is so far of the sequel to The Willow Key (mmmmm, the Key Game...), which can be found here last night while failing to sleep most of the night. Lots of youkos in there...and they started making me think of my own particular brand of kitsune...who then started wanting to be in the NaNo novel. Since no particular character has presented him or herself yet...I'm going to hope that I don't end up with yet another non-human species in this story...
In deference to the kitsune, though, I have come up with an idea to start on after I finish the NaNo novel. It involves lots of kitsune! ^_^ My kitsune...which are vaguely similar to those in The Willow Key...but different. They are certainly not your traditional Japanese fox demon, though. Much more sexy than that.
Soooooo...I'm going to try to hit 27,000 or so tonight, maybe more. I'm at 24,025 at the moment, so less than a thousand to hit minimum for the day, I think... Have to make that at least, to get back into the "you'll finish by the end of November" feeling, even if the story's still gonna be longer than that, it seems. I'm a good bit of the way into chapter 4 at the moment...probably will wrap that up by getting Niki locked back into a room soon, and then move on to some covering of time, to get the war and plot going a little faster.
But first, I have the majority of a chapter in the future that is comprised of just one long scene between Jay and Zack...the one that makes me a sick, twisted lemming. It's fairly explicit, no actual sexual intercourse, but Jay is given a blow job. It's also my first try at writing any kind of sex...so it probably sucks ass. But you know what, that doesn't really matter during NaNo, now does it? Oh yeah, did I mention the incest...there's incest there, because Zack is Jay's younger half-brother. It is not rape, however...I managed to talk Jay into not making it rape before I started writing.
2005 AD, Graymer household, Jay's bedroom
The dreams were nice for once. It had only been six years since Niki disappeared, and he dreamed of her almost every single night. Sometimes they were happy dreams, memories of good times with her that ended up being more than a little bittersweet when they started making him long for her reassuring presence. Sometimes they were nightmares, strange, twisted relivings of when she disappeared, complete with his own account of how it happened. But they were always about her.
It was more than a little weird, when he thought about it. Here he was, completely homosexual with no interest in women whatsoever. You'd think he would dream about a guy occasionally. But no, he dreamed of a female almost every single night. Of course, compared to Niki, sex was trivial. She was a part of him, something he hadn't quite realized until after she was gone and he was left feeling like something just as important to him as his magic was missing.
But that night was a good one. It was one of the few nights when he didn't dream about Niki. Actually, it was one of the few nights when he dreamed more like a normal young man, when he dreamed of sex, rather than a lost twin sister.
The man in his dream was faceless, not literally, but when Jay tried to look at his face, and figure out who he was, the darkness obscured it, and he whispered to leave things as they were. In the dream this didn't bother Jay, so he let it be and just enjoyed the sensations as the faceless man kissed and stroked every last inch of his skin, but carefully avoided his rapidly rising member.
Of course, just because he accepted the man as anonymous and wanting to stay that way didn't stop Jay from giving him a face behind closed eyes. The unknown person wasn't anyone familiar, particularly not Damien. Jay knew his lover's body almost as well as his own, and the hands and mouth in the dream weren't his. But the face that Jay called up to represent the one working over his body was Damien's, the same dyed dark indigo, almost black, hair and serious hazel eyes that he was so deeply familiar with.
So when the faceless man lowered his head to Jay's erection and started to work a warm, but slightly clumsy, mouth along the length, Jay's sleepy, dreaming mind became confused. For a moment, his unconscious self actually thought that the man in the dream was Damien. And it was no surprise that right after that a low moan of, "Damien..." escaped from him.
What was a surprise was that the man in the dream stiffened after hearing that, and then pulled back completely. His dream should not have done that. And it was right about then that the sleeping Jay started to realize that the feelings in his dream were coming from real life...not from his all too active imagination. That was enough to shock him into wakefulness, and enough to make him realize that sure enough, there was another body on top of him, who had just earlier been giving him a blowjob, though he (or she...he shuddered at that thought) had stopped at his mention of Damien.
That was a problem. First off, he knew very well that Damien was on vacation, visiting his parents in England, and could not possibly be in Jay's room doing sexual things to his sleeping partner. Second, Damien just wouldn't do that. Third, he was in his parents' house, not the apartment he shared with Damien...and the only other people who would be in his parents' house were his parents (of course), and Zack, none of whom were Damien, and anyone except Damien doing things along the lines of fellatio to Jay was a very, very bad thing.
In the meanwhile, the person, not realizing that Jay had woken up, had gone back to his (or her...) task. So, of course, Jay then had to open his eyes to see who it was, and he didn't like what he saw. The head bobbing up and down in the vicinity of his crotch was dark, but nowhere near dark enough to be Damien's hair. And, in the limited light of the room, Jay could almost make out that it was brown, not indigo. Which meant it wasn't Damien, not that he had been expecting his lover...and that meant he needed to stop whoever it was before it went any farther, even though it felt very good.
"You're not Damien," he said, which immediately caused the nice sensations to stop as the person froze again, and then finally looked up. Jay sat up to get a better look, and froze himself. His first thought was relief that someone hadn't broken into his parents' place just to give him a blowjob, and possibly more. That thought was followed closely by a vehement, "Oh, fuck...this is not good..."
Staring up at Jay was the wide-eyed, frightened gaze of a face he recognized all too well. Just barely sixteen, though he looked a little older than that with his face that was a mixture of his mother's strong, but graceful, beauty and his father's distinctively masculine features, there was no way that Jay could possibly mistake the face of his younger brother. Not even with the knowledge that those lips now pursed together in an expression of barely controlled fright had just a few moments ago been wrapped around Jay's erection, which was beginning to complain about the sudden lack of attention. Not even when he noticed the slightly disturbing longing just under the surface in those almost glowing red eyes.
"Wait a moment..." Jay thought. "His eyes aren't red...they're brown, just like Dad's." He took another look at the boy sitting at the end of his bed, and sure enough, his eyes were still red, and that just wasn't right.
"Zack! What the hell are you doing?" he asked, puzzling over the strange colored eyes even as he started trying to figure out what was going on.
"I...I'm so sorry, Jay!" Zack blurted out. Jay couldn't help but have the amused thought that if someone were watching the whole scene, they would almost certainly mistake Zack for the older brother, with his baritone voice (even as panicked as it sounded at the moment), his slightly old for his age features, and his height advantage over the actual older one of the two, noticeable even when Jay was laying and he was kneeling at the bottom of the bed.
"I need this," Zack said, his voice going deeper, less panicked, but no less frantic. "I...she told me I can't complete the change if I don't do this. And I want it so badly. I need it, more than anything else. Please, Jay...I have to have this..."
Without any hesitation, he started to lower his head back down, seemingly intent on finishing what he had started. Jay's erection, oblivious to morals or what was right...or anything other than the extremely happy sensation of a mouth wrapped around it, didn't mind this at all. But Jay, the master of his body, despite a certain traitorous secondary sexual organ, had a serious problem with this, so he leaned forward and caught the boy by the shoulders before his lips could sink back down all the way.
"I have a boyfriend, Zack," he said. "I'm not about to cheat on him."
"I promise, I'll never touch you ever again after tonight if you let me do this," Zack said urgently. "Please, Jay, I need this so badly!"
"You're my little brother," Jay said. "Surely you could find someone better to have sex with than me."
"It has to be you! Unless it's you, the change won't be complete. It has to be the person I want most...and that's you, not someone else!"
He was looking back up again, and Jay could see the desperation in his eyes. Even if what he was saying wasn't true, he believed it, and Jay knew that sometimes beliefs could hold sway over reality in ways that no one could predict. But still, as Zack pronounced his need for Jay, and not some other person, a chill ran down Jay's spine. He didn't know what it was for, except that the idea of having sex with his little brother was still mostly disturbing to him. And then he actually processed all of the words Zack had said...
"What change?" he asked.
"...I can't tell you," Zack said, looking back down, though this time fixedly avoiding looking at any part of Jay. "She would kill me if I did."
"Well there is no way that I will even consider letting you do what you want if you don't tell me," Jay said flatly, and more cruelly than he wanted to. But he wanted the answer, even if he had to frighten Zack into giving it.
"I... Umm... A, a "child of the night." A vampire. She...she said it was my birthday present, that I would get to be her child now and not just her lover, even though I'm not sure that I wanted it. She didn't give me a choice, and even if she had, I couldn't say no...not to her. But now she says that I'm halfway through the change. If I don't do this I'll always be stuck where I am, halfway between humanity and the dark. I can't do that. Please, Jay..."
Jay stared at Zack, the new information trickling through his brain at what seemed to be an incredibly slow pace. That explained the red eyes. He didn't know much about vampires, aside from the usual hype that movies and fiction spewed out. Hell, he hadn't even known that there were real life vampires, though it didn't surprise him. But red eyes made sense, not that the thought of Zack having to have sex with his brother did.
Still, just as before, Jay knew that even if it wasn't true, Zack believed it. And knowing the power of magic, Zack's belief would almost certainly hold him eternally frozen between two states if he failed to complete what he thought he had to do, even if he didn't actually have to do it. And besides that, Jay could still see the longing, now much, much more evident in his brother's eyes. He recognized that longing, knew it as a longtime companion throughout years of being surrounded by men who were mostly not inclined toward other men, but who were still just as attractive to Jay as those who were.
Most of all, he knew how much that longing hurt. It didn't matter that the longing was directed at him, it would still hurt just as much. And, as much as he hated to admit it, deep down inside his body and hormones were reminding him that they didn't care whether Zack was his brother or not. Zack was attractive...and it wouldn't kill him to let Zack have what he wanted, just this once. It certainly wouldn't kill him, and it wouldn't really hurt either. It wasn't like he was a girl, who could get pregnant if not careful and then be carrying the incestuous baby. It would just be the sexual joining of two male bodies, purely for pleasure, that just happened to share the same mother.
To stop that longing in Zack, it would be worth doing something a little less than socially acceptable. Especially if it would ensure that Zack wouldn't get stuck in some halfway state, something much like Jay's own magicless existence. That in mind, he shoved the furiously protesting voice of his sense of right and wrong to the back of his mind and leaned forward to kiss Zack.
Zack's eyes widened at the contact of lips, but he fell into the moment without hesitation, coaxing his brother's mouth open with an insistent tongue, and proving that he was ready to take the initiative, just as he had been when he thought the elder one asleep. Mouths still locked, he pushed his smaller brother down to the bed and climbed fully on top of him. His own erection, still covered and confined by clothing, brushed against Jay's as he did so, sending a thrill of pleasure through both bodies.
At that, Zack broke the kiss and proceeded to make his way back down to Jay's midsection, to finish what he had started earlier. He worked his lips and tongue up and down the hardened shaft, and Jay moaned, this time not calling out Damien's name. Zack was inexperienced and clumsy, but he made up for it with enthusiasm, licking and sucking eagerly as Jay grew harder and harder.
Finally, Jay came with a shout, shooting his seed into the waiting mouth of his brother. Zack swallowed it all, a self-satisfied grin plastered across his face when Jay relaxed and looked up at the other. Lazily, Zack pushed himself up the bed, to lay alongside Jay, for the moment seeming to ignore his own unfulfilled need in favor of just staring at the smaller person next to him.
"She was right, it does taste like blood now," Zack commented, gaining a confused look from Jay, who had no idea what the boy was talking about. "Uh...you know...semen... I tried a bit out of curiosity once, and the next time I saw her I asked her how she could stand the taste. She told me that for humans it's in general an acquired taste, but that for us, male or female, gay or not, it's tolerable in general. It's because it's similar enough to blood that we can use it for nourishment in a pinch. She said that once you change it starts to taste like blood...and she was right."
"Oh..." Jay said, not quite sure if he had wanted to know that piece of information or not. For some reason, his mind was having a harder time dealing with the concept of his younger brother than vampire than it was with the concept of his younger brother who lusted after him and had just brought him to orgasm through fellatio. The reminder of that fact wasn't helping much either.
He didn't mention this to Zack, though. As for Zack, he just continued to lay there for a while, not doing anything about the obvious bulge in his pants that wasn't going away. Finally, after about a minute, Jay gave into the nagging voice in the back of his head and asked the question that was foremost in his mind.
"That wasn't enough, was it?" he asked quietly, not sure if he wanted a positive or negative answer at this point.
Zack shook his head. "No," he said, turning his head to Jay. His eyes, if possible, seemed to have gotten even redder than they had been before, though the color had been reduced to a thin ring around his almost unnaturally dilated pupils. It made Jay wonder just how well he could see in the dim light that Jay was having a hard time making out colors in, let alone telling the difference between the red of Zack's irises and the black of his pupils.
"I have to take you," Zack continued, raising his hand to stroke it against Jay's cheek. "Or convince you to take me...but I have the feeling you would prefer the first option."
Jay nodded, noticing the sudden change in Zack's behavior. Where he had been hesitant and apologetic before, so desperate for what he desired that he would have done anything to get it, he had become more confident. He seemed to have realized that Jay was willing to go through with it, and that apparently put him at ease, so that he could take things the way he would rather have them.
But not just that...Jay almost felt something akin to magic in the air, a sort of compulsion to not resist, to give himself to the creature next to him. He suspected that he could have broken it, the hold that Zack was probably trying to put on him, whether he realized it or not, but he didn't. Instead, he gave himself to it, determined to finish what he had set himself to do, and fulfill that longing he had seen before in his younger brother's eyes.
Zack continued to stroke Jay's cheek, even as he moved back up to position himself over Jay again and bent his head to his brother's chest. He laid his mouth to a single pink nipple, teasing at it with his tongue until it hardened beneath his lips. Then, quickly, he nipped the very tip of the nipple with his teeth, not hard enough to draw blood, just enough to cause Jay to gasp at the sudden shock of mixed pain and pleasure. After that, he moved upward, kissing a wet trail up to Jay's neck, where he paused, raising his head and staring at Jay intensely.
"Jay, may I bite you?" he asked, his voice serious, far more serious than Jay could even remember hearing from the boy.
"Bite me?" Jay asked, his mind again stalling at the idea of Zack the vampire. "As in...as in that kind of bite?"
"As in the kind of bite that goes deep, draws blood, and lets me taste you," Zack replied. Jay felt his stomach sink for a moment, and he must have shown some sort of panic on his face, because Zack hurried to add to his statement.
"It doesn't really hurt," he said quickly. "Well, it does for a little bit, just a sharp sting, but it's a good kind of hurt. And then it feels good...really good. I know, she's done it to me before lots of times, and she said that I can already do it, even though I'm not completely changed yet... Please, Jay?"
Jay nodded, not quite sure if he was doing a wise thing or not. Zack smiled, and lowered his head back to Jay's neck. He started to nuzzle at the flesh there, rubbing his nose against it and occasionally nipping a little, but certainly not hard enough to actually call it a bite, until the tension Jay had felt at the idea of Zack biting him, no matter how good he said it felt, melted away into the feeling of something a little more comfortable and familiar. Then, before Jay realized what was happening, Zack took advantage of his more relaxed state and bit.
Just as Zack had said, it stung, but just for a very brief moment. He felt the twin fangs enter his neck, and it made him realize that as difficult as it was to believe what Zack had told him, it was true. No person had teeth like that, something that Jay realized even more as Zack started to suck at his neck, and the sting of the bite suddenly faded. Jay didn't understand it, but the sensation of having his blood sucked out through those two little holes in his neck felt better than anything else Zack had done to him yet, and that included the blow job, something his penis attested to as it sprang back up into readiness the moment Zack started sucking.
But then, just moments after he started, Zack drew back away from Jay, a horrified look on his face. He looked at Jay with a dawning look of terror and despair on his face, but didn't say a word to explain himself. A small trail of Jay's blood ran down from the corner of his mouth, but he didn't even seem to notice it. Confused, Jay stared back at his brother, trying to figure out what had happened.
"What's wrong?" Jay asked. As he spoke, he reached forward to try and wipe the blood off of Zack's face. He had accepted the new nature of his brother, even accepted letting him drink from his neck... But seeing what he knew was his blood running down from Zack's mouth just didn't seem right.
Before his hand could reach Zack's face, the boy drew back, clearly avoiding contact. "It won't work..." he said, his voice full of a sort of sick despair and sounding like he was having a very unpleasant revelation. "I...I can't do it!"
"Do what?" Jay asked, trying to keep his voice calm and soothing, to hopefully not frighten Zack anymore than he already was, despite his body's angry protests at being suddenly neglected. Whatever hesitation he might still feel at the idea of having sex with his brother, his body didn't care. It was ready, willing, and very, very angry at the sudden lack of the exquisite feelings that it had been subjected to just seconds earlier.
Zack didn't even seem to notice that Jay had spoken. He was staring forward, not quite looking at Jay anymore, even though his face was pointed in that direction, and his pupils had constricted so far that Jay could barely see them anymore in the suddenly bright red of his eyes. His mouth hung slightly open, just far enough that Jay could see, for the first time, the fangs that had just bitten him, still a little red with his blood.
"Oh God..." Zack said in the same sickly despairing tone as before. "I can't bring myself to do it! And even if I could, it wouldn't work..."
"Zack, what are you talking about?" Jay asked, trying one more time to touch his brother, this time on the shoulder. Again, Zack pulled away, looking like nothing more than a spooked animal, but at least it seemed to call his attention back to Jay. Instead of explaining, or continuing, he looked straight at Jay, a suddenly serene and calm, but most of all pained, look of apology on his face.
"I'm sorry, Jay," he said, his momentary calmness dissolving as tears started brimming in his eyes and he fought to keep them back. He smiled, the kind of smile that meant that he was hurting and forcing himself to smile. "I just can't do this..."
And then, before Jay could do anything else, he jumped back off the bed and ran for the window. Jay got off the bed himself as quickly as he could, but he wasn't fast enough to catch Zack before he shoved the window up and jumped out. They were on the second floor of the house, but that didn't seem to stop Zack, who jumped out anyway and landed on the ground with a thud, rolling a little bit before finally standing up awkwardly and limping away as fast as he could.
Not for the first time, Jay cursed his own stupidity and foolishness in losing his magic. Had he had access to his own magic, he could have easily caught up to Zack, who looked to be hurt from his jump out the window. But naked and magicless, there was no way Jay would be able to catch up with Zack, who was significantly taller and longer legged than he was. Especially not if he didn't want to jump out the window himself. It couldn't kill him, and whatever might happen, he would heal without any problems, but that didn't mean he would necessarily be in any condition to chase after Zack right after jumping.
Instead, he returned to his bed, a little stiffly. Zack's departure left him confused, and still quite aroused, though his neck was starting to throb a little where he had been bitten. The confusion he would have to put up with, since he had the sinking feeling that Zack wasn't going to come back to explain things, ever. The throbbing would go away eventually, he was sure. And as for the arousal...well, that could be dealt with, even if it would be quite as pleasant as what he had decided to do with his brother.
Sighing, Jay settled into the bed and proceeded to make his hand his lover for a while, so he could get to sleep sometime that night.
...in my defense, since I don't think the sex stuff is particularly good...all of my references for writing a sex scene, particularly a male-male sex scene, come from fics...mostly yaoi, some het, and the odd yuri one. So I...I guess I'm apologizing for my complete and utter crap that I'm trying to call a serious scene in my story...
Oh, and for kicks, here's a little scene that I want to put in the story at some point. Not even a whole page long...this mentions sex, but isn't terribly explicit. It's pretty much just a chance for me to parade around the relationship between Rai and Adan, and make Niki suffer, because I am a horrible person. Besides, I wanted to make Rai said "Oh, ewwwww."
Niki could hear strange sounds coming from the other side of the door. They almost sounded like certain sounds she had heard from Jay before...but it couldn't be that. The other side of the door was the kitchen, and she didn't think anyone, even Rai and Adan would be gutsy enough to do those kind of things in there. So, curiously and slightly warily, she opened the door.
And found that she had apparently spoken (or rather, thought) too soon, as the sounds were indeed coming from Rai and Adan, and were indeed the same kind of sounds that she had heard from Jay. Specifically, Rai had Adan pushed up on the table where everyone prepared their food, and sometimes ate, and both were quite naked. Rai was happily stroking Adan's very erect member, and she could distinctly see Adan's fingers up Rai's butt, stretching him and preparing him for the actual act of sex.
Both boys looked up when they heard the door open and stared at Niki. Neither seemed to mind the intrusion all that much, as evidenced by the fact that neither one's erection flagged even slightly. In fact, Rai waved happily at Niki with his unoccupied hand, seemingly uncaring that she was staring at them and most likely turning beet red in the process.
Niki fled the room, blushing so furiously that her face felt like it was on fire.
She didn't go far, though. She just couldn't get the image of the two of them out of her head, particularly Rai like that. So she stopped just outside the door and listened to the noises coming from inside, feeling vaguely perverted by doing so, even though it wasn't any worse than what the two inside were doing.
"Hey, I think she might be interested in you," Rai said suddenly, his voice light with mischief. "Didn't you see the way she was staring at you?"
"Idiot," Adan grunted, accompanied by a gasp from Rai. "She wasn't interested in me. She was watching you."
The noises stopped for a moment. "Oh, ewwww," Rai said. This was closely followed by a frustrated growl from Adan, with a distinct noise of shifting bodies and a very loud moan from Rai then in quick succession.
Niki could only imagine that they had started the actual act of sex, though she refused to indulge her curiosity by using her magic to peek inside and see if her perverted imagination was correct. Especially not after Rai's comment. She had known that Rai wasn't interested in females before. But hearing it from him, especially about her, it was a different matter, especially with the image of him naked an engaged in definitely sexual activities so fresh in her mind at the moment.
For the second time in less than a few minutes Niki found herself fleeing the scene, face burning up with embarrassment. This time she didn't stick around, though she did almost knock Elie over during her mad rush down the hallway. She didn't stop until she reached her room, where she could lock the door behind her and collapse on the ground so the tears that were a mixture of sadness and embarrassment could flow.
Of course, now my brain is saying it wants kitsune in the story...and it really doesn't want to back down on the issue. I think it has something to do with reading all there is so far of the sequel to The Willow Key (mmmmm, the Key Game...), which can be found here last night while failing to sleep most of the night. Lots of youkos in there...and they started making me think of my own particular brand of kitsune...who then started wanting to be in the NaNo novel. Since no particular character has presented him or herself yet...I'm going to hope that I don't end up with yet another non-human species in this story...
In deference to the kitsune, though, I have come up with an idea to start on after I finish the NaNo novel. It involves lots of kitsune! ^_^ My kitsune...which are vaguely similar to those in The Willow Key...but different. They are certainly not your traditional Japanese fox demon, though. Much more sexy than that.
Soooooo...I'm going to try to hit 27,000 or so tonight, maybe more. I'm at 24,025 at the moment, so less than a thousand to hit minimum for the day, I think... Have to make that at least, to get back into the "you'll finish by the end of November" feeling, even if the story's still gonna be longer than that, it seems. I'm a good bit of the way into chapter 4 at the moment...probably will wrap that up by getting Niki locked back into a room soon, and then move on to some covering of time, to get the war and plot going a little faster.
But first, I have the majority of a chapter in the future that is comprised of just one long scene between Jay and Zack...the one that makes me a sick, twisted lemming. It's fairly explicit, no actual sexual intercourse, but Jay is given a blow job. It's also my first try at writing any kind of sex...so it probably sucks ass. But you know what, that doesn't really matter during NaNo, now does it? Oh yeah, did I mention the incest...there's incest there, because Zack is Jay's younger half-brother. It is not rape, however...I managed to talk Jay into not making it rape before I started writing.
2005 AD, Graymer household, Jay's bedroom
The dreams were nice for once. It had only been six years since Niki disappeared, and he dreamed of her almost every single night. Sometimes they were happy dreams, memories of good times with her that ended up being more than a little bittersweet when they started making him long for her reassuring presence. Sometimes they were nightmares, strange, twisted relivings of when she disappeared, complete with his own account of how it happened. But they were always about her.
It was more than a little weird, when he thought about it. Here he was, completely homosexual with no interest in women whatsoever. You'd think he would dream about a guy occasionally. But no, he dreamed of a female almost every single night. Of course, compared to Niki, sex was trivial. She was a part of him, something he hadn't quite realized until after she was gone and he was left feeling like something just as important to him as his magic was missing.
But that night was a good one. It was one of the few nights when he didn't dream about Niki. Actually, it was one of the few nights when he dreamed more like a normal young man, when he dreamed of sex, rather than a lost twin sister.
The man in his dream was faceless, not literally, but when Jay tried to look at his face, and figure out who he was, the darkness obscured it, and he whispered to leave things as they were. In the dream this didn't bother Jay, so he let it be and just enjoyed the sensations as the faceless man kissed and stroked every last inch of his skin, but carefully avoided his rapidly rising member.
Of course, just because he accepted the man as anonymous and wanting to stay that way didn't stop Jay from giving him a face behind closed eyes. The unknown person wasn't anyone familiar, particularly not Damien. Jay knew his lover's body almost as well as his own, and the hands and mouth in the dream weren't his. But the face that Jay called up to represent the one working over his body was Damien's, the same dyed dark indigo, almost black, hair and serious hazel eyes that he was so deeply familiar with.
So when the faceless man lowered his head to Jay's erection and started to work a warm, but slightly clumsy, mouth along the length, Jay's sleepy, dreaming mind became confused. For a moment, his unconscious self actually thought that the man in the dream was Damien. And it was no surprise that right after that a low moan of, "Damien..." escaped from him.
What was a surprise was that the man in the dream stiffened after hearing that, and then pulled back completely. His dream should not have done that. And it was right about then that the sleeping Jay started to realize that the feelings in his dream were coming from real life...not from his all too active imagination. That was enough to shock him into wakefulness, and enough to make him realize that sure enough, there was another body on top of him, who had just earlier been giving him a blowjob, though he (or she...he shuddered at that thought) had stopped at his mention of Damien.
That was a problem. First off, he knew very well that Damien was on vacation, visiting his parents in England, and could not possibly be in Jay's room doing sexual things to his sleeping partner. Second, Damien just wouldn't do that. Third, he was in his parents' house, not the apartment he shared with Damien...and the only other people who would be in his parents' house were his parents (of course), and Zack, none of whom were Damien, and anyone except Damien doing things along the lines of fellatio to Jay was a very, very bad thing.
In the meanwhile, the person, not realizing that Jay had woken up, had gone back to his (or her...) task. So, of course, Jay then had to open his eyes to see who it was, and he didn't like what he saw. The head bobbing up and down in the vicinity of his crotch was dark, but nowhere near dark enough to be Damien's hair. And, in the limited light of the room, Jay could almost make out that it was brown, not indigo. Which meant it wasn't Damien, not that he had been expecting his lover...and that meant he needed to stop whoever it was before it went any farther, even though it felt very good.
"You're not Damien," he said, which immediately caused the nice sensations to stop as the person froze again, and then finally looked up. Jay sat up to get a better look, and froze himself. His first thought was relief that someone hadn't broken into his parents' place just to give him a blowjob, and possibly more. That thought was followed closely by a vehement, "Oh, fuck...this is not good..."
Staring up at Jay was the wide-eyed, frightened gaze of a face he recognized all too well. Just barely sixteen, though he looked a little older than that with his face that was a mixture of his mother's strong, but graceful, beauty and his father's distinctively masculine features, there was no way that Jay could possibly mistake the face of his younger brother. Not even with the knowledge that those lips now pursed together in an expression of barely controlled fright had just a few moments ago been wrapped around Jay's erection, which was beginning to complain about the sudden lack of attention. Not even when he noticed the slightly disturbing longing just under the surface in those almost glowing red eyes.
"Wait a moment..." Jay thought. "His eyes aren't red...they're brown, just like Dad's." He took another look at the boy sitting at the end of his bed, and sure enough, his eyes were still red, and that just wasn't right.
"Zack! What the hell are you doing?" he asked, puzzling over the strange colored eyes even as he started trying to figure out what was going on.
"I...I'm so sorry, Jay!" Zack blurted out. Jay couldn't help but have the amused thought that if someone were watching the whole scene, they would almost certainly mistake Zack for the older brother, with his baritone voice (even as panicked as it sounded at the moment), his slightly old for his age features, and his height advantage over the actual older one of the two, noticeable even when Jay was laying and he was kneeling at the bottom of the bed.
"I need this," Zack said, his voice going deeper, less panicked, but no less frantic. "I...she told me I can't complete the change if I don't do this. And I want it so badly. I need it, more than anything else. Please, Jay...I have to have this..."
Without any hesitation, he started to lower his head back down, seemingly intent on finishing what he had started. Jay's erection, oblivious to morals or what was right...or anything other than the extremely happy sensation of a mouth wrapped around it, didn't mind this at all. But Jay, the master of his body, despite a certain traitorous secondary sexual organ, had a serious problem with this, so he leaned forward and caught the boy by the shoulders before his lips could sink back down all the way.
"I have a boyfriend, Zack," he said. "I'm not about to cheat on him."
"I promise, I'll never touch you ever again after tonight if you let me do this," Zack said urgently. "Please, Jay, I need this so badly!"
"You're my little brother," Jay said. "Surely you could find someone better to have sex with than me."
"It has to be you! Unless it's you, the change won't be complete. It has to be the person I want most...and that's you, not someone else!"
He was looking back up again, and Jay could see the desperation in his eyes. Even if what he was saying wasn't true, he believed it, and Jay knew that sometimes beliefs could hold sway over reality in ways that no one could predict. But still, as Zack pronounced his need for Jay, and not some other person, a chill ran down Jay's spine. He didn't know what it was for, except that the idea of having sex with his little brother was still mostly disturbing to him. And then he actually processed all of the words Zack had said...
"What change?" he asked.
"...I can't tell you," Zack said, looking back down, though this time fixedly avoiding looking at any part of Jay. "She would kill me if I did."
"Well there is no way that I will even consider letting you do what you want if you don't tell me," Jay said flatly, and more cruelly than he wanted to. But he wanted the answer, even if he had to frighten Zack into giving it.
"I... Umm... A, a "child of the night." A vampire. She...she said it was my birthday present, that I would get to be her child now and not just her lover, even though I'm not sure that I wanted it. She didn't give me a choice, and even if she had, I couldn't say no...not to her. But now she says that I'm halfway through the change. If I don't do this I'll always be stuck where I am, halfway between humanity and the dark. I can't do that. Please, Jay..."
Jay stared at Zack, the new information trickling through his brain at what seemed to be an incredibly slow pace. That explained the red eyes. He didn't know much about vampires, aside from the usual hype that movies and fiction spewed out. Hell, he hadn't even known that there were real life vampires, though it didn't surprise him. But red eyes made sense, not that the thought of Zack having to have sex with his brother did.
Still, just as before, Jay knew that even if it wasn't true, Zack believed it. And knowing the power of magic, Zack's belief would almost certainly hold him eternally frozen between two states if he failed to complete what he thought he had to do, even if he didn't actually have to do it. And besides that, Jay could still see the longing, now much, much more evident in his brother's eyes. He recognized that longing, knew it as a longtime companion throughout years of being surrounded by men who were mostly not inclined toward other men, but who were still just as attractive to Jay as those who were.
Most of all, he knew how much that longing hurt. It didn't matter that the longing was directed at him, it would still hurt just as much. And, as much as he hated to admit it, deep down inside his body and hormones were reminding him that they didn't care whether Zack was his brother or not. Zack was attractive...and it wouldn't kill him to let Zack have what he wanted, just this once. It certainly wouldn't kill him, and it wouldn't really hurt either. It wasn't like he was a girl, who could get pregnant if not careful and then be carrying the incestuous baby. It would just be the sexual joining of two male bodies, purely for pleasure, that just happened to share the same mother.
To stop that longing in Zack, it would be worth doing something a little less than socially acceptable. Especially if it would ensure that Zack wouldn't get stuck in some halfway state, something much like Jay's own magicless existence. That in mind, he shoved the furiously protesting voice of his sense of right and wrong to the back of his mind and leaned forward to kiss Zack.
Zack's eyes widened at the contact of lips, but he fell into the moment without hesitation, coaxing his brother's mouth open with an insistent tongue, and proving that he was ready to take the initiative, just as he had been when he thought the elder one asleep. Mouths still locked, he pushed his smaller brother down to the bed and climbed fully on top of him. His own erection, still covered and confined by clothing, brushed against Jay's as he did so, sending a thrill of pleasure through both bodies.
At that, Zack broke the kiss and proceeded to make his way back down to Jay's midsection, to finish what he had started earlier. He worked his lips and tongue up and down the hardened shaft, and Jay moaned, this time not calling out Damien's name. Zack was inexperienced and clumsy, but he made up for it with enthusiasm, licking and sucking eagerly as Jay grew harder and harder.
Finally, Jay came with a shout, shooting his seed into the waiting mouth of his brother. Zack swallowed it all, a self-satisfied grin plastered across his face when Jay relaxed and looked up at the other. Lazily, Zack pushed himself up the bed, to lay alongside Jay, for the moment seeming to ignore his own unfulfilled need in favor of just staring at the smaller person next to him.
"She was right, it does taste like blood now," Zack commented, gaining a confused look from Jay, who had no idea what the boy was talking about. "Uh...you know...semen... I tried a bit out of curiosity once, and the next time I saw her I asked her how she could stand the taste. She told me that for humans it's in general an acquired taste, but that for us, male or female, gay or not, it's tolerable in general. It's because it's similar enough to blood that we can use it for nourishment in a pinch. She said that once you change it starts to taste like blood...and she was right."
"Oh..." Jay said, not quite sure if he had wanted to know that piece of information or not. For some reason, his mind was having a harder time dealing with the concept of his younger brother than vampire than it was with the concept of his younger brother who lusted after him and had just brought him to orgasm through fellatio. The reminder of that fact wasn't helping much either.
He didn't mention this to Zack, though. As for Zack, he just continued to lay there for a while, not doing anything about the obvious bulge in his pants that wasn't going away. Finally, after about a minute, Jay gave into the nagging voice in the back of his head and asked the question that was foremost in his mind.
"That wasn't enough, was it?" he asked quietly, not sure if he wanted a positive or negative answer at this point.
Zack shook his head. "No," he said, turning his head to Jay. His eyes, if possible, seemed to have gotten even redder than they had been before, though the color had been reduced to a thin ring around his almost unnaturally dilated pupils. It made Jay wonder just how well he could see in the dim light that Jay was having a hard time making out colors in, let alone telling the difference between the red of Zack's irises and the black of his pupils.
"I have to take you," Zack continued, raising his hand to stroke it against Jay's cheek. "Or convince you to take me...but I have the feeling you would prefer the first option."
Jay nodded, noticing the sudden change in Zack's behavior. Where he had been hesitant and apologetic before, so desperate for what he desired that he would have done anything to get it, he had become more confident. He seemed to have realized that Jay was willing to go through with it, and that apparently put him at ease, so that he could take things the way he would rather have them.
But not just that...Jay almost felt something akin to magic in the air, a sort of compulsion to not resist, to give himself to the creature next to him. He suspected that he could have broken it, the hold that Zack was probably trying to put on him, whether he realized it or not, but he didn't. Instead, he gave himself to it, determined to finish what he had set himself to do, and fulfill that longing he had seen before in his younger brother's eyes.
Zack continued to stroke Jay's cheek, even as he moved back up to position himself over Jay again and bent his head to his brother's chest. He laid his mouth to a single pink nipple, teasing at it with his tongue until it hardened beneath his lips. Then, quickly, he nipped the very tip of the nipple with his teeth, not hard enough to draw blood, just enough to cause Jay to gasp at the sudden shock of mixed pain and pleasure. After that, he moved upward, kissing a wet trail up to Jay's neck, where he paused, raising his head and staring at Jay intensely.
"Jay, may I bite you?" he asked, his voice serious, far more serious than Jay could even remember hearing from the boy.
"Bite me?" Jay asked, his mind again stalling at the idea of Zack the vampire. "As in...as in that kind of bite?"
"As in the kind of bite that goes deep, draws blood, and lets me taste you," Zack replied. Jay felt his stomach sink for a moment, and he must have shown some sort of panic on his face, because Zack hurried to add to his statement.
"It doesn't really hurt," he said quickly. "Well, it does for a little bit, just a sharp sting, but it's a good kind of hurt. And then it feels good...really good. I know, she's done it to me before lots of times, and she said that I can already do it, even though I'm not completely changed yet... Please, Jay?"
Jay nodded, not quite sure if he was doing a wise thing or not. Zack smiled, and lowered his head back to Jay's neck. He started to nuzzle at the flesh there, rubbing his nose against it and occasionally nipping a little, but certainly not hard enough to actually call it a bite, until the tension Jay had felt at the idea of Zack biting him, no matter how good he said it felt, melted away into the feeling of something a little more comfortable and familiar. Then, before Jay realized what was happening, Zack took advantage of his more relaxed state and bit.
Just as Zack had said, it stung, but just for a very brief moment. He felt the twin fangs enter his neck, and it made him realize that as difficult as it was to believe what Zack had told him, it was true. No person had teeth like that, something that Jay realized even more as Zack started to suck at his neck, and the sting of the bite suddenly faded. Jay didn't understand it, but the sensation of having his blood sucked out through those two little holes in his neck felt better than anything else Zack had done to him yet, and that included the blow job, something his penis attested to as it sprang back up into readiness the moment Zack started sucking.
But then, just moments after he started, Zack drew back away from Jay, a horrified look on his face. He looked at Jay with a dawning look of terror and despair on his face, but didn't say a word to explain himself. A small trail of Jay's blood ran down from the corner of his mouth, but he didn't even seem to notice it. Confused, Jay stared back at his brother, trying to figure out what had happened.
"What's wrong?" Jay asked. As he spoke, he reached forward to try and wipe the blood off of Zack's face. He had accepted the new nature of his brother, even accepted letting him drink from his neck... But seeing what he knew was his blood running down from Zack's mouth just didn't seem right.
Before his hand could reach Zack's face, the boy drew back, clearly avoiding contact. "It won't work..." he said, his voice full of a sort of sick despair and sounding like he was having a very unpleasant revelation. "I...I can't do it!"
"Do what?" Jay asked, trying to keep his voice calm and soothing, to hopefully not frighten Zack anymore than he already was, despite his body's angry protests at being suddenly neglected. Whatever hesitation he might still feel at the idea of having sex with his brother, his body didn't care. It was ready, willing, and very, very angry at the sudden lack of the exquisite feelings that it had been subjected to just seconds earlier.
Zack didn't even seem to notice that Jay had spoken. He was staring forward, not quite looking at Jay anymore, even though his face was pointed in that direction, and his pupils had constricted so far that Jay could barely see them anymore in the suddenly bright red of his eyes. His mouth hung slightly open, just far enough that Jay could see, for the first time, the fangs that had just bitten him, still a little red with his blood.
"Oh God..." Zack said in the same sickly despairing tone as before. "I can't bring myself to do it! And even if I could, it wouldn't work..."
"Zack, what are you talking about?" Jay asked, trying one more time to touch his brother, this time on the shoulder. Again, Zack pulled away, looking like nothing more than a spooked animal, but at least it seemed to call his attention back to Jay. Instead of explaining, or continuing, he looked straight at Jay, a suddenly serene and calm, but most of all pained, look of apology on his face.
"I'm sorry, Jay," he said, his momentary calmness dissolving as tears started brimming in his eyes and he fought to keep them back. He smiled, the kind of smile that meant that he was hurting and forcing himself to smile. "I just can't do this..."
And then, before Jay could do anything else, he jumped back off the bed and ran for the window. Jay got off the bed himself as quickly as he could, but he wasn't fast enough to catch Zack before he shoved the window up and jumped out. They were on the second floor of the house, but that didn't seem to stop Zack, who jumped out anyway and landed on the ground with a thud, rolling a little bit before finally standing up awkwardly and limping away as fast as he could.
Not for the first time, Jay cursed his own stupidity and foolishness in losing his magic. Had he had access to his own magic, he could have easily caught up to Zack, who looked to be hurt from his jump out the window. But naked and magicless, there was no way Jay would be able to catch up with Zack, who was significantly taller and longer legged than he was. Especially not if he didn't want to jump out the window himself. It couldn't kill him, and whatever might happen, he would heal without any problems, but that didn't mean he would necessarily be in any condition to chase after Zack right after jumping.
Instead, he returned to his bed, a little stiffly. Zack's departure left him confused, and still quite aroused, though his neck was starting to throb a little where he had been bitten. The confusion he would have to put up with, since he had the sinking feeling that Zack wasn't going to come back to explain things, ever. The throbbing would go away eventually, he was sure. And as for the arousal...well, that could be dealt with, even if it would be quite as pleasant as what he had decided to do with his brother.
Sighing, Jay settled into the bed and proceeded to make his hand his lover for a while, so he could get to sleep sometime that night.
...in my defense, since I don't think the sex stuff is particularly good...all of my references for writing a sex scene, particularly a male-male sex scene, come from fics...mostly yaoi, some het, and the odd yuri one. So I...I guess I'm apologizing for my complete and utter crap that I'm trying to call a serious scene in my story...
Oh, and for kicks, here's a little scene that I want to put in the story at some point. Not even a whole page long...this mentions sex, but isn't terribly explicit. It's pretty much just a chance for me to parade around the relationship between Rai and Adan, and make Niki suffer, because I am a horrible person. Besides, I wanted to make Rai said "Oh, ewwwww."
Niki could hear strange sounds coming from the other side of the door. They almost sounded like certain sounds she had heard from Jay before...but it couldn't be that. The other side of the door was the kitchen, and she didn't think anyone, even Rai and Adan would be gutsy enough to do those kind of things in there. So, curiously and slightly warily, she opened the door.
And found that she had apparently spoken (or rather, thought) too soon, as the sounds were indeed coming from Rai and Adan, and were indeed the same kind of sounds that she had heard from Jay. Specifically, Rai had Adan pushed up on the table where everyone prepared their food, and sometimes ate, and both were quite naked. Rai was happily stroking Adan's very erect member, and she could distinctly see Adan's fingers up Rai's butt, stretching him and preparing him for the actual act of sex.
Both boys looked up when they heard the door open and stared at Niki. Neither seemed to mind the intrusion all that much, as evidenced by the fact that neither one's erection flagged even slightly. In fact, Rai waved happily at Niki with his unoccupied hand, seemingly uncaring that she was staring at them and most likely turning beet red in the process.
Niki fled the room, blushing so furiously that her face felt like it was on fire.
She didn't go far, though. She just couldn't get the image of the two of them out of her head, particularly Rai like that. So she stopped just outside the door and listened to the noises coming from inside, feeling vaguely perverted by doing so, even though it wasn't any worse than what the two inside were doing.
"Hey, I think she might be interested in you," Rai said suddenly, his voice light with mischief. "Didn't you see the way she was staring at you?"
"Idiot," Adan grunted, accompanied by a gasp from Rai. "She wasn't interested in me. She was watching you."
The noises stopped for a moment. "Oh, ewwww," Rai said. This was closely followed by a frustrated growl from Adan, with a distinct noise of shifting bodies and a very loud moan from Rai then in quick succession.
Niki could only imagine that they had started the actual act of sex, though she refused to indulge her curiosity by using her magic to peek inside and see if her perverted imagination was correct. Especially not after Rai's comment. She had known that Rai wasn't interested in females before. But hearing it from him, especially about her, it was a different matter, especially with the image of him naked an engaged in definitely sexual activities so fresh in her mind at the moment.
For the second time in less than a few minutes Niki found herself fleeing the scene, face burning up with embarrassment. This time she didn't stick around, though she did almost knock Elie over during her mad rush down the hallway. She didn't stop until she reached her room, where she could lock the door behind her and collapse on the ground so the tears that were a mixture of sadness and embarrassment could flow.