Dear Livejournal,
For the past months, I've been trying to post things other than my obligatory Music reviews and year-enders, but I can't. It seems that my thoughts on things other than the aforementioned subject matters don't matter anymore. No one has made me feel this way, but I do; and I don't know how or why, but I still do.
Just for the week I had two drafts written but I stress over whether to post them or not. For one, the contents speak of being real, and though I don't think I've been pretentious big-time, I know I've also been hiding many things. When there's a flick of courage-mixed-honesty influencing my emotions to write, as soon as I finish the posts I'm back to sucking them up. And there's more guilt in that, because I already prepared my mind to expose--then suddenly I'll snap: Wait! Is this right? Isn't this too bothersome? Is this essential? Resulting in frustration topping frustrations.
I'm frustrated with many things, dear journal, and they don't show. I wish I could talk about them but again, what just happens is the description above.
EDIT (April 10): With the recent major changes that's happened in LiveJournal, its management and the terms, it is like a blessing in disguise for keeping me watchful over the site again nowadays. Moreover, in case anything dire happens to Livejournal, I created a Dreamwidth account where all my entries are imported, and crossposted from now on!
Addict I am, A D D I C T D E S U
P.S. I have a new "fandom" (not yet full-fledged fan but ugh I'm addicted enough)
Even though they're also 4 members now *cries*
Just for the week I had two drafts written but I stress over whether to post them or not. For one, the contents speak of being real, and though I don't think I've been pretentious big-time, I know I've also been hiding many things. When there's a flick of courage-mixed-honesty influencing my emotions to write, as soon as I finish the posts I'm back to sucking them up. And there's more guilt in that, because I already prepared my mind to expose--then suddenly I'll snap: Wait! Is this right? Isn't this too bothersome? Is this essential? Resulting in frustration topping frustrations.
I'm frustrated with many things, dear journal, and they don't show. I wish I could talk about them but again, what just happens is the description above.
EDIT (April 10): With the recent major changes that's happened in LiveJournal, its management and the terms, it is like a blessing in disguise for keeping me watchful over the site again nowadays. Moreover, in case anything dire happens to Livejournal, I created a Dreamwidth account where all my entries are imported, and crossposted from now on!
Addict I am, A D D I C T D E S U
P.S. I have a new "fandom" (not yet full-fledged fan but ugh I'm addicted enough)
Even though they're also 4 members now *cries*