(no subject)
So work and rehearsals are still overwhelming my life, and I don't have the time or energy to say what I want to right now. Also, I'm a bit tired of the inherently self-absorbed nature of my livejournal and would like to post the happenings of a young, smart, sweet guy on my floor. Ladies and gentlemen, the life of Geoff brought to you by Jakob:
So anyway, the story Geoff was telling his fish was this (expressly
written without the consent of Major League Baseball, or Geoff, for
that matter):
"So I go to the gym, right? Running, lifting weights, all that jazz. So
I'm walking down the stairs, and I saw this girl....no, no, this
incredibly beautiful girl checking out a basketball. So I was like,
it's Monday, I don't have anything better to do, I might as well play
some basketball. So I'm in the basketball court, dribbling the ball,
and I decide I might as well shoot some free-throws. So, you know, I
stand at the line, take a deep breath, and shoot. Airball. Next shot:
off the backboard. Following shot: bounces off the rim. 39th shot:
still nothing. But then, on the 40th shot, I make it. Do you know the
moral of the story?"
[Silence]
"The moral of the story is: I really suck at basketball. Which sets us
up for the actual story. After making a couple of free-throws, I try
out a few three-pointers, and then I decide to try from half-court. So
I'm standing at half-court, and, uh, I dribble the ball three times,
position myself, and shoot the ball as hard as I can...not even close.
[Kin peers over the bookshelf. His suspicions are confirmed. Geoff is
nuts.]
"So I shoot again, and again, and again. So, thirty attempts, no
success. I'm starting to get a little tired. The shots just keep on
getting shorter and shorter...things aren't looking good."
[Pensively looks into fish tank. No sympathy is forthcoming.]
"And then: I'm standing at half-court. I'm the only person in the gym.
And then, like, uh..."
[Rubs stubble, taps tank to make sure fish are still awake]
"Anyway, anyway, I had a thought. I can't believe I'm telling you
this...have you ever wanted something really, really bad? So much that
you'd do anything to get it? So yeah, there's this thing that I really
want that much, and would do anything for. But then, this insidious
thought comes to me: making this shot is like achieving your impossible
dream. No matter how hard you try, it's still impossible. And then,
without thinking, I lift up the ball, and God help me, as I'm shooting
it, I feel a push on my right elbow."
[Performs pantomime for fish]
"All of the sudden, it's completely silent, and the ball floats in a
perfect arc...swoosh. The ball drops straight down, bounces five times
on the same spot, and just sits there, directly below the net. And it
felt good. It felt really good. Now, I know you guys are thinking that
I'm making this up, but I swear to God, it actually happened. Like, I
might actually start believing in God now. And not just that passive
kind of belief, either. Like, like, seriously..."
[Fish timer turns tank light off]
"It's a true story, though, guys...I mean, it really happened."
[Fish continue to swim about aimlessly]
"No, no, seriously, it really, actually happened."
[The fish appear unconvinced]
"I'm glad you guys understand. That's why I like having these little
chats. Good night."
-=The preceding 1015 transcript was brought to you by the number B and
the letter 11=-
If I go missing, call the police, and during sentencing, tell the judge
to give that bastard the chair.
Geoff's ex-friend,
Jakob
So anyway, the story Geoff was telling his fish was this (expressly
written without the consent of Major League Baseball, or Geoff, for
that matter):
"So I go to the gym, right? Running, lifting weights, all that jazz. So
I'm walking down the stairs, and I saw this girl....no, no, this
incredibly beautiful girl checking out a basketball. So I was like,
it's Monday, I don't have anything better to do, I might as well play
some basketball. So I'm in the basketball court, dribbling the ball,
and I decide I might as well shoot some free-throws. So, you know, I
stand at the line, take a deep breath, and shoot. Airball. Next shot:
off the backboard. Following shot: bounces off the rim. 39th shot:
still nothing. But then, on the 40th shot, I make it. Do you know the
moral of the story?"
[Silence]
"The moral of the story is: I really suck at basketball. Which sets us
up for the actual story. After making a couple of free-throws, I try
out a few three-pointers, and then I decide to try from half-court. So
I'm standing at half-court, and, uh, I dribble the ball three times,
position myself, and shoot the ball as hard as I can...not even close.
[Kin peers over the bookshelf. His suspicions are confirmed. Geoff is
nuts.]
"So I shoot again, and again, and again. So, thirty attempts, no
success. I'm starting to get a little tired. The shots just keep on
getting shorter and shorter...things aren't looking good."
[Pensively looks into fish tank. No sympathy is forthcoming.]
"And then: I'm standing at half-court. I'm the only person in the gym.
And then, like, uh..."
[Rubs stubble, taps tank to make sure fish are still awake]
"Anyway, anyway, I had a thought. I can't believe I'm telling you
this...have you ever wanted something really, really bad? So much that
you'd do anything to get it? So yeah, there's this thing that I really
want that much, and would do anything for. But then, this insidious
thought comes to me: making this shot is like achieving your impossible
dream. No matter how hard you try, it's still impossible. And then,
without thinking, I lift up the ball, and God help me, as I'm shooting
it, I feel a push on my right elbow."
[Performs pantomime for fish]
"All of the sudden, it's completely silent, and the ball floats in a
perfect arc...swoosh. The ball drops straight down, bounces five times
on the same spot, and just sits there, directly below the net. And it
felt good. It felt really good. Now, I know you guys are thinking that
I'm making this up, but I swear to God, it actually happened. Like, I
might actually start believing in God now. And not just that passive
kind of belief, either. Like, like, seriously..."
[Fish timer turns tank light off]
"It's a true story, though, guys...I mean, it really happened."
[Fish continue to swim about aimlessly]
"No, no, seriously, it really, actually happened."
[The fish appear unconvinced]
"I'm glad you guys understand. That's why I like having these little
chats. Good night."
-=The preceding 1015 transcript was brought to you by the number B and
the letter 11=-
If I go missing, call the police, and during sentencing, tell the judge
to give that bastard the chair.
Geoff's ex-friend,
Jakob