(no subject)
people leaving for college is really bugging me for some reason.
everyone who is staying here or leaving seems all sad about being seperated from their friends.
not me. i think its because i havent been very close with anyone who is leaving this summer.
which sucks.
but whatever.
plus i am kind of still in denial about it.
so i am suppose to spend the first weekend of september with richard.
he is staying the night here friday night, we are hanging out on saturday, driving back to alma and i am staying there saturday and sunday night. where im sure i will be hanging out with him and his friends and having a good time.
i am excited for it i cant lie.
but im not rushing into anything this time. taking it slow.
one of my bestfriends thinks its tooo fast for us. for me to spending a weekend alone together. its not going to be some huge romantic weekend with just us.
its just going to be two friends hanging out.
another one of my bestfriends thinks that it will be very good for me. it will help me forget about asshole. and she doesnt get whats wrong with it, i mean we have hung out before.
in my mind i have, and never will see a problem with it. its just going to be us hanging out. and i know nothing will happen because i wont let it. i have some control over myself altho i guess people like to think i dont.
i dont want to sound mean. but im just getting sick of the "friends butting into my relationships because they see soemthing wrong with it" thing.
i cant go through it again.
i cant worry about my friends judging me.
im different that you guys.
like different things, find kissing not that big of a deal, like different guys.
and it also sucks because somehow people have percieved me as someone who has dated alot of guys.
i dont know how that happend.
i have only really had one real boyfriend.
i am just really frustrated and in a bad mood.