G Rated, Cross Fandom Silliness
"Cascade Police Department."
Blair drawled out the words, more focused on the lecture in front of him than whoever might be on the phone. Answering the phone ranked right up there with root canal as far as Blair was concerned. Too often it was either listening to complaints he couldn't do anything about, or playing answering service for one of the badges. As it was, Blair had stopped giving his name a year ago, tired of explaining that he wasn't actually a cop, nor was he a secretary or an aide for the Cascade P.D. Civilian ride along as part of a thesis didn't exactly explain much and just invited questions. It was easier just directing calls and being a non entity to those outside the precinct.
"Detective Jim Ellison... please."
Her voice was sort of squeaky with an accent it took Blair a minute to identify. Frowning as he closed his eyes, focusing beyond the words to try and draw on the year he'd spent studying the anthropological differences within the United States cultures. "Excuse me?"
"Is there a Jim Ellison there? Detective Jim Ellison?"
Now she sounded agitated at having to repeat herself and Blair couldn't help but smile. "Chicago."
"No, it's Frannie." There was a long pause though she already had Blair's undivided attention. "Wait, yes I'm in Chicago. Who do y'think you are, the police?"
Now it was Blair's turn to let the pause grow between them, tapping his pencil on the desk while he waited for her to catch on. The brief pause became a pregnant one and it was only the soft hush of her breathing that let him know she was still there.
"What?" Now the hint of a squeak was more pronounced, not annoying like some but definitely higher. It was the sort of sound that would have made Jim flinch, clapping a hand over his ear to avoid the aural intrusion again.
"You just asked me if I thought I was the police and you called..." He never got a chance to finish.
"Right. I get it. Haha. You just think you're a laugh riot, doncha?" Without seeing her he could guess at her body posture, the irritated tapping of a foot or the roll of eyes. He wondered if he could find a way to ask what color her eyes were without sounding creepy. "Please tell me you're not Ellison."
Some things were easier than others. "I'm not Ellison. Trust me, not even close, Chicago. Jim's in with the Captain right now. Anything I can help you with?"
"The name is Franni... Francesca Vecchio at the 27th Precinct. I've got a Detective Raymond Vecchio here that wants to talk to your Detective Ellison so could you go get him? I mean, the Captain wouldn't mind, would he?"
Irritated tones had turned wheedling and Blair could hear a voice in the background. Male. Sounded pushy but then Blair was better at cultural anthropology than he was emotion. If that wasn't the case then he'd have a girlfriend rather than spending more time as a student at Ranier University than some of the professors.
"Would you walk in on your Captain and this Detec... Wait, you work for the same precinct where a family member is a cop? Your father? Husband? You know that cops tend have some of the highest suicide rates out there, not to mention that they have a higher than usual rate for divorce, not to mention the abus..."
"Ew! No! He's my brother." Blair was willing to bet her nose was curling even as she said it. "And he's not abusive or suicidal, thank you."
"So what does your husband do?" There was no guarantee she was as cute as she sounded but he had to admit he found her accent sort of adorable.
"I don't have a husband. I sort of have this thing for this guy but he's sort of, you know, oblivious and... FRANNIE! Right, right... Calm down, Ray. I'm just talking to the guy. So do you have a name, Mister "Too-Afraid-T'Bother-The-Captain"?"
Leaning back in his chair, Blair propped his feet up on the desk. "Maybe. Depends. You the sort hung up on cops or you willing to give the guy doing this out of the goodness of his heart a chance?"
"Oh I'm willing to give anyone a chance. Well, not as bad as that sounded. I'm not like... easy or nothing. I'm just... Frannie! Okay! I'm askin'. So, your name?"
"Blair Sandburg. I'm a civilian liaison between the Cascade Police Department and Ranier University. Now do you prefer Francesca or Frannie?" Long distant couldn't be that bad, could it?
"A civilian liaison, huh? Did your Dad get killed too?" Before Blair could respond to that, confused where dead parents had suddenly entered the conversation, she moved on. "And it's Frannie. Frannie's fine so long as you don't go bellowing it like..."
"Chief?"
Blair jumped like he'd been shot, bolting upright in his chair. Or at least he tried. In the process of the talk he'd twisted himself around the cord and so the result was that he was jerked back down, his brow slamming against the desk before he was bounced back into the chair, sliding to the floor.
Jim stared down at him, dumbfounded. It had been like the comedy routine out of a black and white comedy movie except it had happened right in front of him. "Uhmmm, did I hear you mention
the name Vecchio? Detective Vecchio in Chicago?"
"Uhmm, yeah." Sheepish and in pain, Blair slowly untangled himself from the phone cord. "Uhmm, Frannie? Yeah, Jim's here." He looked up at Jim and then turned slightly, hunching in over the phone. "So, I was thinking that maybe I could call you sometime?"
"I'd like that, Blair. I get off at five." Now that voice that had changed octaves in the course of a sentence was soft and pleased. It was nice doing something right.
Blair refused to look up, curling in around the phone a bit more. "So about six then? I can get your number from the system."
"You do that and I'll go straight home and..."
"Sandburg!"
The cord was growing tight, the slack slowly being twisted around Jim's hand as he loomed over his partner.
"So I'll call you tonight,' he said, words coming out in a rush as he rose up on his knees to keep talking. "Bye Fran..."
Dropping back down to the floor, Blair couldn't help but smile even as Jim lowered the phone slightly from his ear.
"I knew this day would come but I didn't think it would be so soon,' Ellison said with a sigh, shaking his head as he tsked.
Frowning Blair tried to figure out what was unusual about it all. Other than his Keystone cop routine with the cord and the desk. "What are you talking about?"
Smirking, he nudged Blair with his foot. "I knew that eventually the day would come that you'd exhaust all the women in Washington State."
Blair wasn't sure he found that as funny as Jim, and apparently Ray on the other end of the line, did.
Blair drawled out the words, more focused on the lecture in front of him than whoever might be on the phone. Answering the phone ranked right up there with root canal as far as Blair was concerned. Too often it was either listening to complaints he couldn't do anything about, or playing answering service for one of the badges. As it was, Blair had stopped giving his name a year ago, tired of explaining that he wasn't actually a cop, nor was he a secretary or an aide for the Cascade P.D. Civilian ride along as part of a thesis didn't exactly explain much and just invited questions. It was easier just directing calls and being a non entity to those outside the precinct.
"Detective Jim Ellison... please."
Her voice was sort of squeaky with an accent it took Blair a minute to identify. Frowning as he closed his eyes, focusing beyond the words to try and draw on the year he'd spent studying the anthropological differences within the United States cultures. "Excuse me?"
"Is there a Jim Ellison there? Detective Jim Ellison?"
Now she sounded agitated at having to repeat herself and Blair couldn't help but smile. "Chicago."
"No, it's Frannie." There was a long pause though she already had Blair's undivided attention. "Wait, yes I'm in Chicago. Who do y'think you are, the police?"
Now it was Blair's turn to let the pause grow between them, tapping his pencil on the desk while he waited for her to catch on. The brief pause became a pregnant one and it was only the soft hush of her breathing that let him know she was still there.
"What?" Now the hint of a squeak was more pronounced, not annoying like some but definitely higher. It was the sort of sound that would have made Jim flinch, clapping a hand over his ear to avoid the aural intrusion again.
"You just asked me if I thought I was the police and you called..." He never got a chance to finish.
"Right. I get it. Haha. You just think you're a laugh riot, doncha?" Without seeing her he could guess at her body posture, the irritated tapping of a foot or the roll of eyes. He wondered if he could find a way to ask what color her eyes were without sounding creepy. "Please tell me you're not Ellison."
Some things were easier than others. "I'm not Ellison. Trust me, not even close, Chicago. Jim's in with the Captain right now. Anything I can help you with?"
"The name is Franni... Francesca Vecchio at the 27th Precinct. I've got a Detective Raymond Vecchio here that wants to talk to your Detective Ellison so could you go get him? I mean, the Captain wouldn't mind, would he?"
Irritated tones had turned wheedling and Blair could hear a voice in the background. Male. Sounded pushy but then Blair was better at cultural anthropology than he was emotion. If that wasn't the case then he'd have a girlfriend rather than spending more time as a student at Ranier University than some of the professors.
"Would you walk in on your Captain and this Detec... Wait, you work for the same precinct where a family member is a cop? Your father? Husband? You know that cops tend have some of the highest suicide rates out there, not to mention that they have a higher than usual rate for divorce, not to mention the abus..."
"Ew! No! He's my brother." Blair was willing to bet her nose was curling even as she said it. "And he's not abusive or suicidal, thank you."
"So what does your husband do?" There was no guarantee she was as cute as she sounded but he had to admit he found her accent sort of adorable.
"I don't have a husband. I sort of have this thing for this guy but he's sort of, you know, oblivious and... FRANNIE! Right, right... Calm down, Ray. I'm just talking to the guy. So do you have a name, Mister "Too-Afraid-T'Bother-The-Captain"?"
Leaning back in his chair, Blair propped his feet up on the desk. "Maybe. Depends. You the sort hung up on cops or you willing to give the guy doing this out of the goodness of his heart a chance?"
"Oh I'm willing to give anyone a chance. Well, not as bad as that sounded. I'm not like... easy or nothing. I'm just... Frannie! Okay! I'm askin'. So, your name?"
"Blair Sandburg. I'm a civilian liaison between the Cascade Police Department and Ranier University. Now do you prefer Francesca or Frannie?" Long distant couldn't be that bad, could it?
"A civilian liaison, huh? Did your Dad get killed too?" Before Blair could respond to that, confused where dead parents had suddenly entered the conversation, she moved on. "And it's Frannie. Frannie's fine so long as you don't go bellowing it like..."
"Chief?"
Blair jumped like he'd been shot, bolting upright in his chair. Or at least he tried. In the process of the talk he'd twisted himself around the cord and so the result was that he was jerked back down, his brow slamming against the desk before he was bounced back into the chair, sliding to the floor.
Jim stared down at him, dumbfounded. It had been like the comedy routine out of a black and white comedy movie except it had happened right in front of him. "Uhmmm, did I hear you mention
the name Vecchio? Detective Vecchio in Chicago?"
"Uhmm, yeah." Sheepish and in pain, Blair slowly untangled himself from the phone cord. "Uhmm, Frannie? Yeah, Jim's here." He looked up at Jim and then turned slightly, hunching in over the phone. "So, I was thinking that maybe I could call you sometime?"
"I'd like that, Blair. I get off at five." Now that voice that had changed octaves in the course of a sentence was soft and pleased. It was nice doing something right.
Blair refused to look up, curling in around the phone a bit more. "So about six then? I can get your number from the system."
"You do that and I'll go straight home and..."
"Sandburg!"
The cord was growing tight, the slack slowly being twisted around Jim's hand as he loomed over his partner.
"So I'll call you tonight,' he said, words coming out in a rush as he rose up on his knees to keep talking. "Bye Fran..."
Dropping back down to the floor, Blair couldn't help but smile even as Jim lowered the phone slightly from his ear.
"I knew this day would come but I didn't think it would be so soon,' Ellison said with a sigh, shaking his head as he tsked.
Frowning Blair tried to figure out what was unusual about it all. Other than his Keystone cop routine with the cord and the desk. "What are you talking about?"
Smirking, he nudged Blair with his foot. "I knew that eventually the day would come that you'd exhaust all the women in Washington State."
Blair wasn't sure he found that as funny as Jim, and apparently Ray on the other end of the line, did.