stupid people
anyways. i keep trying not to think about anything kris says, because, well, she's an idiot.
like, i know that i say that about a lot of people...but damn, kris can be dumb. i'm not even sure how to explain. i've never met anyone so dumb in my life. she's all allegedly book smart, (she keeps rattling on about her 4.1 gpa) but she just says and does the dumbest things i've ever seen anyone do.
and she's religious and conservative and very close-minded about everything. and impossibly shallow. and i usually can't bring myself to take her seriously. but lately she's been getting to me, and i really don't think she's trying to.
i have this list of things a man would have to be before i would even consider marrying him. and because of this list, i'm pretty sure i will be single my whole life. it's very specific and not negotiable. but that's okay with me, because it is important to me. and not one single thing on the list refers to him physically or financially in the least.
if you're interested, here's the list:
he has to be...(in no particular order)
• socially liberal
• comfortable with sexuality (not homophobic)
• a feminist
• vegan
• able to make me laugh
pretty short list for such a tall order, huh? hehe.
anyway, long story short, one of the items is vegan. it's just that i want to have a child, and i want to raise her (or him) as a vegan, and if my child can't eat meat, watching her (or his) father eat it makes it seem like some kind of a priviledge.
kris was asking me about my veganism and when i told her i intended to raise a child that way, she was outraged. "How could you do that to your kid?!"
I, in turn, was outraged. Veganism is not a punishment. I stopped eating meat because it is healthier not to, and I just don't believe animals ought to be slaughtered for food. It's my choice and my morality, and although I haven't tried to push my friends into it, if I am responsible for a child and making the decisions about her (or his) food choices up to a certain age, then I'm sticking to mine. It doesn't hurt anyone not to eat meat. Jeez. From her reaction, you'd have thought I was going to feed my child puppies or other babies or something.
And then she tried to tell me that God intended people to eat meat. She insinuated that it was a sin not to. I was dumbfounded. For starters, when had God descended to tell Kris anything? (Not to mention that if God wanted a message distributed, wouldn't He have picked someone with more credibility among her peers than Kris?) Not to mention that if you accept God as creator, then the best implications of His intentions would probably be the design of the things He created, and people are not biologically designed to eat meat. It makes us sick. And if you don't buy into that, then how about that Adam and Eve are vegetarians in the Garden of Eden? And point to one place in the Bible that it says something to the effect of Thou Shalt Not Not Eat Meat. Even if you believe that animals were put here for human consumption, there's no support for the idea that not eating them is wrong.
Ugh, sorry about all that. It's just that since becoming a vegan, I have actively tried to recruit zero people to veganism. I can't understand why people keep trying to convince me to go back to eating meat.
Anyway, moving on...The other night, I shared my list with Kris because she was talking about getting married and I told her I didn't really want to--ever--and that if I ever changed my mind, the guy would have to meet some very specific criteria. I wrote up the list for her inspection. She argued with me on all of them (and told me I would never find a male feminist (I've already met two) but I told her that was kind of the point I was making).
Tonight she told me she'd come up with a list herself, and that she'd found a boy she thought might fit it. She started talking and I looked at the clock. Seven minutes later exactly, I interrupted her.
I told her that what she had told me so far was that she was interested in a man with prerequisite proportions and a stable padded financial future and a nice car. No mention of how he had to treat her, or what he had to think about or believe in or act like. At all. I told her she was so superficial that it made me want to vomit (I used those exact words). She didn't take that well. She was like, "Well, at least I want a husband!"
I was like, "What's wrong with not wanting a husband?"
She told me it was immoral. I told her it was a good thing she was dumb, or I might start to get offended at this. I asked how it was immoral. She said sex before marriage was wrong (she herself--single non-virgin, but I left that alone). I told her that the issue we were discussing was simply a lack of marriage, not the presence of sex. She said she couldn't quite explain why it was wrong, but insisted that it was.
I then sort of went off on her. I told her she was being ignorant and misogynistic in claiming that women couldn't exist morally separate from men, and that she was threatened by the idea of a happy, single, independent woman who found meaning in herself as a complete entity probably because she had never met one at her church, and so had grown up thinking of women as the wives of men and not as something quite worthy of definition on their own.
She told me I didn't understand and that I should come to her church sometime. I told her they could show me that book of the Bible that said people have to eat meat--that was probably where all this marriage nonsense was.
I was infuriated. I can't explain it. These decisions of mine, though uncommon, are usually the ones that people are most easily willing to accept. They affect no one but myself (and perhaps anyone who would want to marry me [aside from janna ;)]). I didn't anticipate these accusations. I hadn't thought that these simple decisions could be the basis for damning judgment.
I mean, I've had sex with a married man. I've gotten an abortion. I use Jesus' name in vain all the time and I enjoy fornication. Send me to hell for any of those if that's what you believe. But veganism? Being permanently single? Those are things that simply should not be wrong--in any realm of life--including religion.
But she never seems to anticipate what will set me off. She never seems to contemplate that she's saying anything offensive. She's always surprised by my sudden outbursts of self-protection. So I find it hard to really dislike her.
And she's dumb.
like, i know that i say that about a lot of people...but damn, kris can be dumb. i'm not even sure how to explain. i've never met anyone so dumb in my life. she's all allegedly book smart, (she keeps rattling on about her 4.1 gpa) but she just says and does the dumbest things i've ever seen anyone do.
and she's religious and conservative and very close-minded about everything. and impossibly shallow. and i usually can't bring myself to take her seriously. but lately she's been getting to me, and i really don't think she's trying to.
i have this list of things a man would have to be before i would even consider marrying him. and because of this list, i'm pretty sure i will be single my whole life. it's very specific and not negotiable. but that's okay with me, because it is important to me. and not one single thing on the list refers to him physically or financially in the least.
if you're interested, here's the list:
he has to be...(in no particular order)
• socially liberal
• comfortable with sexuality (not homophobic)
• a feminist
• vegan
• able to make me laugh
pretty short list for such a tall order, huh? hehe.
anyway, long story short, one of the items is vegan. it's just that i want to have a child, and i want to raise her (or him) as a vegan, and if my child can't eat meat, watching her (or his) father eat it makes it seem like some kind of a priviledge.
kris was asking me about my veganism and when i told her i intended to raise a child that way, she was outraged. "How could you do that to your kid?!"
I, in turn, was outraged. Veganism is not a punishment. I stopped eating meat because it is healthier not to, and I just don't believe animals ought to be slaughtered for food. It's my choice and my morality, and although I haven't tried to push my friends into it, if I am responsible for a child and making the decisions about her (or his) food choices up to a certain age, then I'm sticking to mine. It doesn't hurt anyone not to eat meat. Jeez. From her reaction, you'd have thought I was going to feed my child puppies or other babies or something.
And then she tried to tell me that God intended people to eat meat. She insinuated that it was a sin not to. I was dumbfounded. For starters, when had God descended to tell Kris anything? (Not to mention that if God wanted a message distributed, wouldn't He have picked someone with more credibility among her peers than Kris?) Not to mention that if you accept God as creator, then the best implications of His intentions would probably be the design of the things He created, and people are not biologically designed to eat meat. It makes us sick. And if you don't buy into that, then how about that Adam and Eve are vegetarians in the Garden of Eden? And point to one place in the Bible that it says something to the effect of Thou Shalt Not Not Eat Meat. Even if you believe that animals were put here for human consumption, there's no support for the idea that not eating them is wrong.
Ugh, sorry about all that. It's just that since becoming a vegan, I have actively tried to recruit zero people to veganism. I can't understand why people keep trying to convince me to go back to eating meat.
Anyway, moving on...The other night, I shared my list with Kris because she was talking about getting married and I told her I didn't really want to--ever--and that if I ever changed my mind, the guy would have to meet some very specific criteria. I wrote up the list for her inspection. She argued with me on all of them (and told me I would never find a male feminist (I've already met two) but I told her that was kind of the point I was making).
Tonight she told me she'd come up with a list herself, and that she'd found a boy she thought might fit it. She started talking and I looked at the clock. Seven minutes later exactly, I interrupted her.
I told her that what she had told me so far was that she was interested in a man with prerequisite proportions and a stable padded financial future and a nice car. No mention of how he had to treat her, or what he had to think about or believe in or act like. At all. I told her she was so superficial that it made me want to vomit (I used those exact words). She didn't take that well. She was like, "Well, at least I want a husband!"
I was like, "What's wrong with not wanting a husband?"
She told me it was immoral. I told her it was a good thing she was dumb, or I might start to get offended at this. I asked how it was immoral. She said sex before marriage was wrong (she herself--single non-virgin, but I left that alone). I told her that the issue we were discussing was simply a lack of marriage, not the presence of sex. She said she couldn't quite explain why it was wrong, but insisted that it was.
I then sort of went off on her. I told her she was being ignorant and misogynistic in claiming that women couldn't exist morally separate from men, and that she was threatened by the idea of a happy, single, independent woman who found meaning in herself as a complete entity probably because she had never met one at her church, and so had grown up thinking of women as the wives of men and not as something quite worthy of definition on their own.
She told me I didn't understand and that I should come to her church sometime. I told her they could show me that book of the Bible that said people have to eat meat--that was probably where all this marriage nonsense was.
I was infuriated. I can't explain it. These decisions of mine, though uncommon, are usually the ones that people are most easily willing to accept. They affect no one but myself (and perhaps anyone who would want to marry me [aside from janna ;)]). I didn't anticipate these accusations. I hadn't thought that these simple decisions could be the basis for damning judgment.
I mean, I've had sex with a married man. I've gotten an abortion. I use Jesus' name in vain all the time and I enjoy fornication. Send me to hell for any of those if that's what you believe. But veganism? Being permanently single? Those are things that simply should not be wrong--in any realm of life--including religion.
But she never seems to anticipate what will set me off. She never seems to contemplate that she's saying anything offensive. She's always surprised by my sudden outbursts of self-protection. So I find it hard to really dislike her.
And she's dumb.