My Shitty Life
I feel like everything that ever seems like it is going ok, not great but ok, it all falls to shit. I am not just talking like one or two days or bullshit I am talking the past fucking month has gone wrong, out right wrong. I feel like I have no brain. All I do is fuck with things that were going fine. I have had four complaints at work in four weeks. After having my section cut down for a couple of ddays and everything seemed to be going fine and then I went back to a normal station and then I get another complaint so now I have to follow another server again for two shifts. Which means that I suck. I basically feel like a completly useless person right now. I am not making anything better by being there I am making things worse. What am I doing wrong? What? Why am I a fucking shitty server. I get all these great compliments but its the four tables in a month that make me look like dog shit. I hate the fact that all I seem to do is fuck up. It's just another day of shit that I fucked up on. I just want to curl up into a hole and forget that I ever lived. I really feel like there is no point in my life. All I ever do is fuck things up so why should I really be here. I just want to be a decent person but I can't. I alienate all my friends. I am just not a good person. All I want to know is where I went wrong with my life, how I fucked it up so bad. What have I ever really done that was that awful, but I guess like that one man wrote on his comment card "awful server, annoying personality." Guess thats who I am......annoying and worthless....why, just why.........