on_thecouch - 19.1
"Let me know you're up there. Come on. Love me, hate me, kill me, anything. Just let me know it." - Cool Hand Luke
You do something to me
that I can´t explain.
So would I be out of line if I said,
I miss you.
~Lifehouse
He'd be lying if he said he didn't question every phone call, every knock on the door, and every email possibly being her. There wasn't much hope there, but it was still a thought. A skipped breath.
But deep down he knew they never would be. Deep down, though he missed her and still cared, he knew it was something he had to learn to move on from. He didn't know where he'd move to or how, but he had to. Because there would be nothing more. Him leaving their...everything up to her, meant it was done. That he was certain of.
A piece of him still wanted to know. He was human, after all. He wanted to know if she read the email. He wanted to know if she cared, if it affected her...if she missed him as he missed her. Even to find out she didn't miss him, and didn't care that he'd stepped aside...even that, he wanted to know.
Or maybe he didn't.
No, he did. It was the unknowns that they spent so much time in that killed him.
All the same, he missed the unknowns.
At least in the unknowns he got to hold her, kiss her, and dance with her. He had her in the unknowns.
Those damned aching, confusing, unknowns.
He hated all of it. He wanted to be done with all of it. But he wasn't. And he didn't know how to be.
241
You do something to me
that I can´t explain.
So would I be out of line if I said,
I miss you.
~Lifehouse
He'd be lying if he said he didn't question every phone call, every knock on the door, and every email possibly being her. There wasn't much hope there, but it was still a thought. A skipped breath.
But deep down he knew they never would be. Deep down, though he missed her and still cared, he knew it was something he had to learn to move on from. He didn't know where he'd move to or how, but he had to. Because there would be nothing more. Him leaving their...everything up to her, meant it was done. That he was certain of.
A piece of him still wanted to know. He was human, after all. He wanted to know if she read the email. He wanted to know if she cared, if it affected her...if she missed him as he missed her. Even to find out she didn't miss him, and didn't care that he'd stepped aside...even that, he wanted to know.
Or maybe he didn't.
No, he did. It was the unknowns that they spent so much time in that killed him.
All the same, he missed the unknowns.
At least in the unknowns he got to hold her, kiss her, and dance with her. He had her in the unknowns.
Those damned aching, confusing, unknowns.
He hated all of it. He wanted to be done with all of it. But he wasn't. And he didn't know how to be.
241