(no subject)
you ever just get to this point in life when youre tired of everything? or that you just have absolutely no joy in life..its weird how everything can turn from horray great, to i dont give a shit life is terrible.
I feel like my whole world is crashing down right before my eyes.
I wish i could turn back time..in the words of cher. I really honestly do, everything was so much more simplier..things just fit together perfectly with no flaws. I hate when things are out of order, and not justified.
I got fired from my job, mind you i've been working there for about 3 years..and they had to "let me go",over a very stupid situation.
My boyfriend, or whatever he is..is living in a completely different world than i am. I dont even think we see alike anymore, on anything. I feel like im holding on to him..and making him stay with me. Thats probally not even the case but for some reason i have this gut-instinct that it just might be. I hate the feeling of failure. I really feel like i failed being a good girlfriend..i thought i was for sooo long, maybe i was in denial or somthing. Im one of those people who will for some odd reason point out everything i do that is great...especially when it comes to me doing somthing for somebody else..i guess im not the altrustic person i thought i was..it's like i think i deserve a reward everytime i do somthing good for someone else..and if it doesnt happen than that person sucks.
i dont know.
i think i could be loosing it. I need out, i need to go to philadelphia asap. I need to start my own life, from scratch.
FUCK!
I feel like my whole world is crashing down right before my eyes.
I wish i could turn back time..in the words of cher. I really honestly do, everything was so much more simplier..things just fit together perfectly with no flaws. I hate when things are out of order, and not justified.
I got fired from my job, mind you i've been working there for about 3 years..and they had to "let me go",over a very stupid situation.
My boyfriend, or whatever he is..is living in a completely different world than i am. I dont even think we see alike anymore, on anything. I feel like im holding on to him..and making him stay with me. Thats probally not even the case but for some reason i have this gut-instinct that it just might be. I hate the feeling of failure. I really feel like i failed being a good girlfriend..i thought i was for sooo long, maybe i was in denial or somthing. Im one of those people who will for some odd reason point out everything i do that is great...especially when it comes to me doing somthing for somebody else..i guess im not the altrustic person i thought i was..it's like i think i deserve a reward everytime i do somthing good for someone else..and if it doesnt happen than that person sucks.
i dont know.
i think i could be loosing it. I need out, i need to go to philadelphia asap. I need to start my own life, from scratch.
FUCK!