Don't feel happy or well today. Might have a seasonable bug. Went shopping for a swimsuit, and like shopping for shoes, I am always down and depressed afterwards, even if I find something (I didn't).

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Saw my GP today and got a med cert. Put on for a leave of absence from the Masters for Semester 2 of this year. Not up to anything else right now. Oh, and my GP prescribed LUVOX for my depression.

I watched A.I. on TV last night. The ending always makes me cry, which I did. Gabby was on the bed, coughing, and when I patted her Theo snuggled up as well. I think I would be very lost without my pets. I need to go out today though, I was overcome by feelings of frustration and sadness dog walking this morning. I think I've been overly ( Read more... )

Got Triggered by a comment I saw in a friend's LJ post a little while earlier. Clearly I still have BIG issues over Fandom. Another friend invited me to a a Con in New Zealand and the bottom line is I don't want to go to that. The last con I was was (not counting Aussiecon III) in 1996 I was suicidal at. I swore a vow never to go to one ever again.

Well, was going to see a film today before going to a counselling session and then go shopping. But my right knee seems just as bad today as it was yesterday. So no film, though I do need to do the other two.


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\Some years ago I made a comment at some LGBT function that "I felt broken". A colleague of mine, may thinking that I referred to being Trans, aggressively countered with "no no you're not!" but the truth is she didn't know what she was talking about.  I felt broken as a teenager, and I feel broken now.

And it's not just my knee either. I know that ( Read more... )

I'm semi-retiring Elsie (again) and most of my other alts in SL. Apart from attending support groups and posing for webcomics/graphic novels they won't be in-world much at all. I'm not abandoning Second Life (tried that before, doesn't work) but every thing's in a state of flux right now and I need to sort that out. Also, SL is a lot emptier with ( Read more... )

This is the arc of my depressrion around that same ol' black hole:


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I felt totally fucked yesterday when I got home with Bobby, and spent most of the rest of the night in bed with a very sore right leg and chest pains. Probably just stress and bad posture (the pains that is, not the sore leg) but - I also felt very angry at myself. The artwork I made, entitled "Our Differences make us the same" was only created ( Read more... )