Shattered: As the World Turns fic; Luke/Reid (4/?)
Title: Shattered (4/?)
Author: erikssiren
Banner by: thesicko1012
Rating: R
Word Count: 30,000+
Characters/Pairings: Luke/Reid, Luke/Noah, hints of Allison/Casey and Brad/Katie. Also, appearances by Kyle/Fish from One Life to Live and others. (I'd say who, but that would give away the surprise!)
Warnings: Character death, angst (LOTS), some swearing and mentions of Noah. Lots of them. In the positive light. If you don't like it, then please don't read!
Story Summary: Set in the 2008 Valentine's Day AU. Luke and Noah have been together ever since they met that fateful day in New York City. But when a tragedy tears them apart, Luke struggles to move on. When a new doctor comes to town under mysterious circumstances, will he be what Luke needs? Set in the AU world of the Nuke Valentine's Day 2008 Episode.
Chapter Summary: Luke and Reid attend the Halloween ball
Author's Notes: Sorry, first of all, for the huge delay! I've been sidetracked by other fics/fandoms and this sort fell by the wayside. It's also going to be more chapters, though I have no idea how many, since part of the delay was also me expanding the story. I hope you enjoy this installment, and since the next chapter is partially written I'm hoping to have it up sometime this month.
Previous chapters: One| Two| Three
Luke barely recognized the banquet hall of the Lakeview as he stepped through the open double doors leading into the room. Circular tables covered in alternating orange and black tablecloths filled most of the area, with a small space set aside for dancing in front of a live string quartet. Flashes of light sporadically burst through the room as a cameraman urged people to commemorate the evening. The party had begun an hour ago, Luke had struggled getting the tux on and even now it felt wrong against his skin. His mother had bought him a burnt-orange tie in an attempt to celebrate the holiday in a classy style and his hands smoothed it down nervously.
Luke slowly walked over to the large buffet table, also decked out in the traditional Halloween colors, picking a few hors d'oeuvres with little intent on actually eating. Lines of champagne flutes filled with pale bubbling liquid winked temptingly at him. He wanted a drink so bad, he could actually taste it. He could feel the slight burn and the welcoming warmth; sense the blissful nothingness as he slipped into an alcohol-induced sleep. It would be so easy to just forget that he was wearing the suit he meant to wear on his wedding day, that his life hadn't crumbled with the steel of the ship and that he wasn't possibly falling for another guy only six months after the love of his life died.
Luke blinked and realized his hand was outstretched, reaching toward the effervescent nectar without knowing what he was doing. Carly's voice whispered in his ear all the platitudes and encouragements they learned in their meetings but he didn't listen.
"Good evening, Luke."
The young man jumped, his hand dropping as he turned to face the owner of the voice.
"Timothy? What are you doing here?" The professor looked like a completely different person in his rented tux and shoes, his normally unkempt hair slicked back and a pair of glasses Luke didn't realize he needed perched on his nose.
"The department head suggested I mingle with the community and while I would have preferred a less formal setting, this was the only function for a while." He tugged slightly at his tie and Luke had to hide a smile.
"Well I'm glad to see you," Luke answered as his eyes danced over the semi-crowded area. He recognized a few faces but wasn’t sure if he should approach them. Lucinda had given him few instructions on what he was actually meant to achieve here tonight, other than to “sell Dr. Oliver” and with last night’s dream still fresh in his mind Luke wanted nothing to do with the neurosurgeon.
"Are you okay?" Timothy's voice brought Luke back from remembering the dream. "You seem...preoccupied."
"I just didn't sleep well last night and I'm supposed to be here on business only I'm not quite sure what to do. My grandmother left me to talk up Dr. Oliver and to reassure some investors that he is actually worth the price of his..."
"Unorthodox personality?" Timothy supplied in a dry voice. Luke chuckled.
"That's one way of putting it. I take it you've met him?"
The slightly older man nodded after taking a swallow of what looked like soda. Luke had to remember to ask him where he found that. "Only briefly. I was looking for someone at the hospital the other day and ran into him. Literally."
Luke laughed. "I bet he didn't take it well."
"Not really, no. But I don't really blame him. He clearly doesn't want to be here and other than the case with Lucas, he doesn't have anything to challenge him. He's frustrated and he wants his life to return to the way it was."
Luke stared at the other man, who looked as though he realized he had said too much. "You got all that just from talking to him?"
"I'm a perceptive person," Timothy replied. He cleared his throat nervously. "I'll help you find him."
Across the room, Reid Oliver stood glaring at the pretentious idiots around him, unaware of Luke’s presence. He glanced at his watch and sighed heavily. He had barely been here an hour and he already wanted to punch every upturned nose in the place. Suddenly his pocket vibrated and he fished out his phone quickly, eager for any distraction he could get.
You know what I need and we both know what happens when you say no.
“Shit,” he breathed, staring at the small glowing screen as though it would answer back.
“That from Riley?” A voice asked and Reid looked up to see the man Oakdale knew as Adam Pine standing next to him. Reid silently handed over the phone and Pine repeated the doctor’s curse.
“I think he's here,” Reid said tiredly. “You promised you would get him before it got this far.”
“Believe me, I want nothing more than to get this guy behind bars, but cryptic texts won’t convince a judge to get us a warrant much less a jury of all the charges we want to put against him.”
“What if I filed a complaint against him, just get him for stalking? That'll give you guys time to find evidence of the rest and I won't have to worry about him coming after me." Or Brad and Katie, he added mentally. As much as they annoyed him sometimes, he didn't want to see them hurt because of him. "Didn't you guys get Bundy on a traffic ticket?”
The dark-skinned man shook his head as his eyes scanned the room. “If his lawyer gets him out or gets the charges thrown out on a technicality, the grounds for the rest of the charges get shaky. We need something concrete, something else we can use in court to back up the texts.”
"You want to wire me up? It will never work. I don’t know what Riley’s on or if he’s coming down, but either way he’s smart. He knew enough the first time to get a doctor to steal his drugs for him so that if he went down he wouldn't be alone. Plus, he’s paranoid. The minute he even thinks he believes something is up, he’ll snap and I'd rather you not wait until he murdered me to actually do something.”
"We are doing something. We've got you under surveillance 24/7, we've got people on Bob Hughes, Lucinda Walsh and anyone else connected with you that has a lot of money. My team is working around the clock to get a better profile for this guy. It's just a slow process when there's so little on him." He sighed, rubbing a hand over his shaved head. “And given that he’s gone through all this to get a hold of you-“
“You mean what I have access to-“
“No, he’s in love with you, that’s why he’s reaching out to you. At the core he's a stalker and they- ”
Adam cut himself off as Luke walked up, a hollow smile on his face. Luke had seen the pair across the room and had debated how much he felt like dealing with Dr. Oliver. But, they were the only friendly faces in the room and maybe talking with the real doctor would dispel the memory of the dream one. Besides, Timothy all but forced him over there with a weak excuse to meet up once he found more non-alcoholic drinks.
“Dr. Oliver, Adam. I didn’t know you knew each other.”
“I’m on the board,” the taller man said and meant to continue but Reid cut him off.
“Yes, and as a member of the board he has a lot of interaction with the doctor who is going to head the wing said board is funding. If you occupied your seat every once in a while Mr. Snyder, you’d realize that instead of asking inane questions.” It was a cheap shot, but Reid was on edge. And if Luke wasn’t so tired, if he didn't feel like he was wearing someone else's clothes and the memory of his dream wasn’t hanging in front of Reid like a ghost, he would have argued.
“You’re right,” he said simply and heard the weariness in his own voice.
“You okay?” Reid asked and Luke smiled a bit at the genuine concern in his voice. The new professor's traitorous heart beat faster when the smile was answered.
“Yeah, it’s just…been a rough 24 hours.”
“You’re telling me,” Reid scoffed as the third man in their group, who had watched their interaction with a mixture of amusement and concern, walked away silently.
“I’m sorry my grandmother dragged you here,” Luke said after a moment of awkward silence. “I know this isn’t your thing.”
Reid shrugged. “As much as I hate it and try to avoid them, politics come with the job. They just happened to be forced on me this time around.” He took a sip of the now warm beer from the glass in his hand. “Why are you here?”
Luke glanced at him before returning his gaze to the rest of the room. “My grandmother and Brian had to go to a conference in New York and she accidentally agree to both functions. So she asked me to come here.”
“You don’t sound happy about that. I thought you’d jump at this sort of thing.”
“I’m not really good with the wining and dining,” Luke replied, eyes surveying the room without taking in any details.
“Especially since you know nothing about what your money is going to,” Reid said sharply.
"You don’t know a thing about what I’ve gone through," Luke bit out, "what I’m still going through and what it has to do with the foundation-“
“No, I don’t,” Reid interrupted hotly. “And honestly, I am truly sorry for your loss, but if you’re going to put money into something that affects people's lives, if you’re going to do it in the name of the man you supposedly love-“
"I do love him,” Luke hissed.
“-than you better damn well care about it instead of turning your back on it!” Reid’s voice carried over room's chatter and caused a few glares to head their way. After meeting every single stare with his own dark look, Reid swiftly walked away.
Luke stood momentarily rooted to the spot in both anger and shock before suddenly following the doctor’s exit and spotted him just outside a side door that led to a small clearing with a bench. He would not give the older man the satisfaction of seeing him break down again, he was going to fight. “What the hell is your problem?” Luke cried after pushing open the door and marching over to where the doctor sat with his head in his hands.
“My problem?” He asked incredulously as he lifted his head. “My problem is I’m stuck in this one-horse town because of one stupid mistake that it seems I'll never fix. A young boy's life I'm meant to save could be put at risk because of it and my career is hanging by a thread. So excuse me, Mr. Snyder, if your little drama isn’t on the top of my list!” Reid pushed himself up during his outburst and the two men stood nearly nose to nose.
“Little drama? I lost the man I love to a terrorist attack and if it weren’t for me and my stupid selfishness he’d probably be alive right now!” Tears formed in Luke’s eyes, but they didn’t fall. “We should be married by now!”
“It sucks, it really sucks you had to go through that, but right now I’d take a dead fiancé over what I’ve got to deal with,” Reid said coldly. “And yeah, Noah might be gone and it seems you still haven't gotten over your narcissism issues, but you’ve got a family who care so damn much about you they’d probably kill for you and who knows? Maybe they have. I definitely wouldn't put it past your grandmother. You’ve got a job and enough money to live comfortably for the rest of your life. So how about you be grateful for that instead of reminding anyone who will listen that he’s dead?” Before he knew what happened, Luke’s fist flew out and connected with the doctor's face with a sickening sound.
Reid stumbled back in surprise before glaring at Luke as he cupped a hand over his jaw. "What the hell was that?"
"For standing there disrespecting the memory of the man I love," Luke responded angrily.
Reid stood a hairsbreadth away from the young man. "Listen, my life is going to shit right now and I could really care less about you. This may come to a surprise but you and your family are not the center of my universe. I would love nothing more than to get as far away from the insanity that seems to go hand in hand with this Hell." He grabbed Luke's collar and pulled him close. "Get over yourself."
Luke matched Reid's heated gaze and the anger didn't fade, only morphed into something just as hot and twice as dangerous. The blonde could feel something curling in his belly and before it could grow he pulled away from Reid's grasp and sat down on a nearby bench with a shaky sigh.
“I’m sorry,” he said eventually. “It's just...it's been six months and I'm not handling it very well. I didn’t mean to take it out on you.” Reid said nothing but did sit next to Luke. “With Noah I had my life planned out and for once I thought everything was going to be perfect…and it was all just ripped away.”
“I know the feeling,” Reid said yet didn't follow with any further explanation. They sat in a silence that turned companionable after a while and they both internally registered that something had just changed between them.
Suddenly Luke stood, his hand outstretched toward Reid. “How about a dance?”
“Excuse me?”
“Come on, we’re at a ball. I’m pretty sure dancing is required.”
“Why? I’m not the dancing type and I get the feeling you aren’t either.”
“Consider it an apology for starting a fight with you,” Luke said with a grin as he wiggled his fingers.
“Lucinda does keep telling me I need to get along with more of the board members, though I'm not sure this is what she had in mind,” Reid said dryly and remained seated.
“Well, if you want we can go back inside and you can make small talk with the others,” Luke laughed. Reid shot up from the bench, causing Luke’s laugh to grow. “Come on, just one dance.”
“Fine,” Reid sighed and Luke couldn’t tell if the resignation was faked or not. They held each other at a respectable distance, slightly stiff. They may have taken a step away from hating each other, but they really weren't anywhere near comfortable enough for this. “I feel like wear in some trite romantic comedy,” Reid said with a huff.
"What's life without a little fluff?" Luke teased. The smile Reid gave him was borderline thin and genuine and they fall into silence again. The stiffness in Luke's body didn't let up and he was beginning to realize how bad of an idea this really was as they swayed to the music filtering from an open window in silence. “I was supposed to be married in this tux,” he said after a few moments. The admission confused and surprised them both and Luke cleared his throat nervously. He wasn't meant to be here, not with this man and not in this suit. The thoughts weren't stop repeating himself in his head. This was wrong, yet it felt...right.
Reid had said nothing so Luke tried to focus on the orange pocket square sticking out from the doctor's black suit jacket. He had forgone a tie and left the top buttons of his white dress shirt unbuttoned. If he didn't feel a stab of guilt just thinking about it, Luke would have admitted Reid looked very attractive.
Suddenly a strange noise broke into the quiet and Luke realized a cell phone was vibrating. Reid quickly let go of Luke to fish his out and the young man wondered why he felt a little disappointed at the lack of contact. Reid flipped his phone open and the calm that had begun to settle over his face as they danced disappeared instantly and he began to scan the area around them.
“We should go inside,” he said tersely, placing a hand on the small of Luke’s back and steering him toward the door.
“What’s going on? Dr. Oliver?” He had never seen the older man look this terrified and it scared him. He dug his heels in slightly. “I’m not going until you tell me.”
Reid turned and the panic in his face almost made Luke regret his stubbornness. “Please, Luke,” he said softly. “I don’t want to see you hurt because of me.” The use of his name shocked Luke enough into moving.
As soon as they were inside Reid relaxed a little but still looked pale. “Stay here, I’ll be right back.” And just as Luke was about to protest, his own phone rang. He opened it without looking, his eyes locked on Reid’s retreating form.
“Luke Snyder.”
“Hey, it’s Kyle,” the familiar rough voice soothed Luke almost instantly. “I just got your message, you okay?”
“Yeah,” Luke assured him lightly as he walked over to a bench down the hall near the doors to the party. “I talked to my dad a bit after I called you. I think I’m getting better, but there’s something else I wanted to talk to you about, if you don’t mind.”
“Of course I don’t, that’s why I’m here.”
“So, the dream I had, the guy Noah turned into? He’s new in town and we’ve kind of started to get to know each other and-"
“You like him, don’t you?” Kyle asked and Luke wished he could see his face to know if he was smiling or not.
“I don’t know. He’s certainly interesting.” Down the hall Luke could see Reid showing Adam his phone, both of their faces dark with worry. “And the more I get to know him the more I want to know. It’s just…to even think about wanting to get to know another guy romantically, it feels like I’m betraying Noah. It just, it feels too soon. It's too soon, right?”
"You're not betraying him," Kyle said soothingly. "And honestly I don't know about it being too soon. You and Noah were having problems just before the attack."
"Yeah," Luke sighed as he watched Reid and Adam argue, their voices not quite loud enough to carry down the hall. Reid pointed toward where Luke sat and he quickly looked away.
"And maybe when he came home you would have made things right. Maybe you would have postponed things until after his tour, maybe after spending time together you would have fallen even more in love with him. But maybe you were and are ready to move on from him sooner than you think."
"That's a lot of maybes, Kyle." Luke said as he ran a hand through his hair.
"That's life. You know that better than anyone," Kyle replied.
"I guess." He paused, looking back to where the two men were still arguing. "How are you and Oliver doing?" He asked, changing the subject.
"Good, I just talked to him. He said they had a little memorial this morning and that they would be docking somewhere soon to celebrate the holiday." Movement caught his eye and Luke looked back up to see Reid walking toward him. "I've got ER duty tonight but I thought I'd call you on my break, you sounded really upset."
"You didn't have to spend your free time on me." Reid sat down next to him. But thank you, really. I needed to talk to you. I'll call you later about Thanksgiving, okay?"
"Alright," Kyle laughed. "See ya."
"Bye." Luke shut the phone slowly and snuck a glance at Reid as he dropped it into his jacket pocket. The doctor's head was tipped back, leaning against the wall behind them. "You okay?" He asked after a few minutes of silence.
“I’m so sorry,” the other man said instead of answering the question.
“For what?”
“For dragging you into my problems.”
“Well, it would help if I knew what was going on.” Luke’s voice carried a bit of frustration. "You looked pretty upset with Adam over there."
“The less you know the safer you’ll be, or so they tell me.”
“Who told you? Dr. Oliver-“
“Reid,” he interrupted suddenly.
“What?” Luke turned to stare at him.
“I think you’ve earned the right to call me by my first name. At the very least you’re probably going to earn it.” Luke couldn’t think of a response to this cryptic statement so he let the rest of his demands drop. Reid Oliver was turning into a very complicated man and Luke wasn’t sure if that was a good or a bad thing.
They sat in a slightly uncomfortable silence until Reid blew out a sigh. “Tell me about him,” he said as he brushed his fingers across the gold band on Luke’s left ring finger. Luke looked down at it, then rested his head on the wall; mirroring Reid's earlier position.
“Why did you want to become a neurosurgeon?” He asked Reid instead, who shook his head at the subject avoidance but seemed to think about the question anyway.
"I fell in love with the brain," he said simply and Luke snorted. "Think about it. Each one’s different but they’re all so amazing. It’s this tangled mass of grey spaghetti, it’s totally alien. It’s not much to look at with the naked eye, but it makes us walk and talk, think…remember…smell…love-" His voice hitched when their eyes met at this and they both quickly looked away, letting out twin sighs of embarrassed laughter. Reid’s voice softened as he continued to talk. “It produces the Sistine Chapel…and chocolate, theory of relativity, Godfather I and II…not so sure about III…what?”
Luke let out the breath he didn't realize he was holding. He could feel a genuine smile on his face and he thought he knew the feeling swelling in his chest: love. But it couldn’t be, not yet, no matter what everyone said. “It’s just…I’ve never heard the brain sound so beautiful.” Reid blushed slightly and Luke cursed when his heart thudded at the sight.
"Your turn. Tell me something about Noah," Reid said after Luke lapsed into silence. The blonde looked down, twisting the ring slightly.
"He was going to make movies when his tour was over," he said with a shaky voice. "We had made all these plans to move to D.C. so I could intern at the Smithsonian and he could work on a documentary about gays in the military." Luke shut his eyes and sighed. "He wanted to change the world."
Reid’s hand covered the one of Luke’s that spun the silver band in endless anxious circles. He opened his mouth to say something, but apparently thought better of it. Luke stared at their hands, so different a touch from when Reid blocked his punch, but not an unwelcome warmth.
Oh God, Luke thought as they sat listening to the music seeping out from the abandoned party. I’m falling for him.
Author: erikssiren
Banner by: thesicko1012
Rating: R
Word Count: 30,000+
Characters/Pairings: Luke/Reid, Luke/Noah, hints of Allison/Casey and Brad/Katie. Also, appearances by Kyle/Fish from One Life to Live and others. (I'd say who, but that would give away the surprise!)
Warnings: Character death, angst (LOTS), some swearing and mentions of Noah. Lots of them. In the positive light. If you don't like it, then please don't read!
Story Summary: Set in the 2008 Valentine's Day AU. Luke and Noah have been together ever since they met that fateful day in New York City. But when a tragedy tears them apart, Luke struggles to move on. When a new doctor comes to town under mysterious circumstances, will he be what Luke needs? Set in the AU world of the Nuke Valentine's Day 2008 Episode.
Chapter Summary: Luke and Reid attend the Halloween ball
Author's Notes: Sorry, first of all, for the huge delay! I've been sidetracked by other fics/fandoms and this sort fell by the wayside. It's also going to be more chapters, though I have no idea how many, since part of the delay was also me expanding the story. I hope you enjoy this installment, and since the next chapter is partially written I'm hoping to have it up sometime this month.
Previous chapters: One| Two| Three
Luke barely recognized the banquet hall of the Lakeview as he stepped through the open double doors leading into the room. Circular tables covered in alternating orange and black tablecloths filled most of the area, with a small space set aside for dancing in front of a live string quartet. Flashes of light sporadically burst through the room as a cameraman urged people to commemorate the evening. The party had begun an hour ago, Luke had struggled getting the tux on and even now it felt wrong against his skin. His mother had bought him a burnt-orange tie in an attempt to celebrate the holiday in a classy style and his hands smoothed it down nervously.
Luke slowly walked over to the large buffet table, also decked out in the traditional Halloween colors, picking a few hors d'oeuvres with little intent on actually eating. Lines of champagne flutes filled with pale bubbling liquid winked temptingly at him. He wanted a drink so bad, he could actually taste it. He could feel the slight burn and the welcoming warmth; sense the blissful nothingness as he slipped into an alcohol-induced sleep. It would be so easy to just forget that he was wearing the suit he meant to wear on his wedding day, that his life hadn't crumbled with the steel of the ship and that he wasn't possibly falling for another guy only six months after the love of his life died.
Luke blinked and realized his hand was outstretched, reaching toward the effervescent nectar without knowing what he was doing. Carly's voice whispered in his ear all the platitudes and encouragements they learned in their meetings but he didn't listen.
"Good evening, Luke."
The young man jumped, his hand dropping as he turned to face the owner of the voice.
"Timothy? What are you doing here?" The professor looked like a completely different person in his rented tux and shoes, his normally unkempt hair slicked back and a pair of glasses Luke didn't realize he needed perched on his nose.
"The department head suggested I mingle with the community and while I would have preferred a less formal setting, this was the only function for a while." He tugged slightly at his tie and Luke had to hide a smile.
"Well I'm glad to see you," Luke answered as his eyes danced over the semi-crowded area. He recognized a few faces but wasn’t sure if he should approach them. Lucinda had given him few instructions on what he was actually meant to achieve here tonight, other than to “sell Dr. Oliver” and with last night’s dream still fresh in his mind Luke wanted nothing to do with the neurosurgeon.
"Are you okay?" Timothy's voice brought Luke back from remembering the dream. "You seem...preoccupied."
"I just didn't sleep well last night and I'm supposed to be here on business only I'm not quite sure what to do. My grandmother left me to talk up Dr. Oliver and to reassure some investors that he is actually worth the price of his..."
"Unorthodox personality?" Timothy supplied in a dry voice. Luke chuckled.
"That's one way of putting it. I take it you've met him?"
The slightly older man nodded after taking a swallow of what looked like soda. Luke had to remember to ask him where he found that. "Only briefly. I was looking for someone at the hospital the other day and ran into him. Literally."
Luke laughed. "I bet he didn't take it well."
"Not really, no. But I don't really blame him. He clearly doesn't want to be here and other than the case with Lucas, he doesn't have anything to challenge him. He's frustrated and he wants his life to return to the way it was."
Luke stared at the other man, who looked as though he realized he had said too much. "You got all that just from talking to him?"
"I'm a perceptive person," Timothy replied. He cleared his throat nervously. "I'll help you find him."
Across the room, Reid Oliver stood glaring at the pretentious idiots around him, unaware of Luke’s presence. He glanced at his watch and sighed heavily. He had barely been here an hour and he already wanted to punch every upturned nose in the place. Suddenly his pocket vibrated and he fished out his phone quickly, eager for any distraction he could get.
You know what I need and we both know what happens when you say no.
“Shit,” he breathed, staring at the small glowing screen as though it would answer back.
“That from Riley?” A voice asked and Reid looked up to see the man Oakdale knew as Adam Pine standing next to him. Reid silently handed over the phone and Pine repeated the doctor’s curse.
“I think he's here,” Reid said tiredly. “You promised you would get him before it got this far.”
“Believe me, I want nothing more than to get this guy behind bars, but cryptic texts won’t convince a judge to get us a warrant much less a jury of all the charges we want to put against him.”
“What if I filed a complaint against him, just get him for stalking? That'll give you guys time to find evidence of the rest and I won't have to worry about him coming after me." Or Brad and Katie, he added mentally. As much as they annoyed him sometimes, he didn't want to see them hurt because of him. "Didn't you guys get Bundy on a traffic ticket?”
The dark-skinned man shook his head as his eyes scanned the room. “If his lawyer gets him out or gets the charges thrown out on a technicality, the grounds for the rest of the charges get shaky. We need something concrete, something else we can use in court to back up the texts.”
"You want to wire me up? It will never work. I don’t know what Riley’s on or if he’s coming down, but either way he’s smart. He knew enough the first time to get a doctor to steal his drugs for him so that if he went down he wouldn't be alone. Plus, he’s paranoid. The minute he even thinks he believes something is up, he’ll snap and I'd rather you not wait until he murdered me to actually do something.”
"We are doing something. We've got you under surveillance 24/7, we've got people on Bob Hughes, Lucinda Walsh and anyone else connected with you that has a lot of money. My team is working around the clock to get a better profile for this guy. It's just a slow process when there's so little on him." He sighed, rubbing a hand over his shaved head. “And given that he’s gone through all this to get a hold of you-“
“You mean what I have access to-“
“No, he’s in love with you, that’s why he’s reaching out to you. At the core he's a stalker and they- ”
Adam cut himself off as Luke walked up, a hollow smile on his face. Luke had seen the pair across the room and had debated how much he felt like dealing with Dr. Oliver. But, they were the only friendly faces in the room and maybe talking with the real doctor would dispel the memory of the dream one. Besides, Timothy all but forced him over there with a weak excuse to meet up once he found more non-alcoholic drinks.
“Dr. Oliver, Adam. I didn’t know you knew each other.”
“I’m on the board,” the taller man said and meant to continue but Reid cut him off.
“Yes, and as a member of the board he has a lot of interaction with the doctor who is going to head the wing said board is funding. If you occupied your seat every once in a while Mr. Snyder, you’d realize that instead of asking inane questions.” It was a cheap shot, but Reid was on edge. And if Luke wasn’t so tired, if he didn't feel like he was wearing someone else's clothes and the memory of his dream wasn’t hanging in front of Reid like a ghost, he would have argued.
“You’re right,” he said simply and heard the weariness in his own voice.
“You okay?” Reid asked and Luke smiled a bit at the genuine concern in his voice. The new professor's traitorous heart beat faster when the smile was answered.
“Yeah, it’s just…been a rough 24 hours.”
“You’re telling me,” Reid scoffed as the third man in their group, who had watched their interaction with a mixture of amusement and concern, walked away silently.
“I’m sorry my grandmother dragged you here,” Luke said after a moment of awkward silence. “I know this isn’t your thing.”
Reid shrugged. “As much as I hate it and try to avoid them, politics come with the job. They just happened to be forced on me this time around.” He took a sip of the now warm beer from the glass in his hand. “Why are you here?”
Luke glanced at him before returning his gaze to the rest of the room. “My grandmother and Brian had to go to a conference in New York and she accidentally agree to both functions. So she asked me to come here.”
“You don’t sound happy about that. I thought you’d jump at this sort of thing.”
“I’m not really good with the wining and dining,” Luke replied, eyes surveying the room without taking in any details.
“Especially since you know nothing about what your money is going to,” Reid said sharply.
"You don’t know a thing about what I’ve gone through," Luke bit out, "what I’m still going through and what it has to do with the foundation-“
“No, I don’t,” Reid interrupted hotly. “And honestly, I am truly sorry for your loss, but if you’re going to put money into something that affects people's lives, if you’re going to do it in the name of the man you supposedly love-“
"I do love him,” Luke hissed.
“-than you better damn well care about it instead of turning your back on it!” Reid’s voice carried over room's chatter and caused a few glares to head their way. After meeting every single stare with his own dark look, Reid swiftly walked away.
Luke stood momentarily rooted to the spot in both anger and shock before suddenly following the doctor’s exit and spotted him just outside a side door that led to a small clearing with a bench. He would not give the older man the satisfaction of seeing him break down again, he was going to fight. “What the hell is your problem?” Luke cried after pushing open the door and marching over to where the doctor sat with his head in his hands.
“My problem?” He asked incredulously as he lifted his head. “My problem is I’m stuck in this one-horse town because of one stupid mistake that it seems I'll never fix. A young boy's life I'm meant to save could be put at risk because of it and my career is hanging by a thread. So excuse me, Mr. Snyder, if your little drama isn’t on the top of my list!” Reid pushed himself up during his outburst and the two men stood nearly nose to nose.
“Little drama? I lost the man I love to a terrorist attack and if it weren’t for me and my stupid selfishness he’d probably be alive right now!” Tears formed in Luke’s eyes, but they didn’t fall. “We should be married by now!”
“It sucks, it really sucks you had to go through that, but right now I’d take a dead fiancé over what I’ve got to deal with,” Reid said coldly. “And yeah, Noah might be gone and it seems you still haven't gotten over your narcissism issues, but you’ve got a family who care so damn much about you they’d probably kill for you and who knows? Maybe they have. I definitely wouldn't put it past your grandmother. You’ve got a job and enough money to live comfortably for the rest of your life. So how about you be grateful for that instead of reminding anyone who will listen that he’s dead?” Before he knew what happened, Luke’s fist flew out and connected with the doctor's face with a sickening sound.
Reid stumbled back in surprise before glaring at Luke as he cupped a hand over his jaw. "What the hell was that?"
"For standing there disrespecting the memory of the man I love," Luke responded angrily.
Reid stood a hairsbreadth away from the young man. "Listen, my life is going to shit right now and I could really care less about you. This may come to a surprise but you and your family are not the center of my universe. I would love nothing more than to get as far away from the insanity that seems to go hand in hand with this Hell." He grabbed Luke's collar and pulled him close. "Get over yourself."
Luke matched Reid's heated gaze and the anger didn't fade, only morphed into something just as hot and twice as dangerous. The blonde could feel something curling in his belly and before it could grow he pulled away from Reid's grasp and sat down on a nearby bench with a shaky sigh.
“I’m sorry,” he said eventually. “It's just...it's been six months and I'm not handling it very well. I didn’t mean to take it out on you.” Reid said nothing but did sit next to Luke. “With Noah I had my life planned out and for once I thought everything was going to be perfect…and it was all just ripped away.”
“I know the feeling,” Reid said yet didn't follow with any further explanation. They sat in a silence that turned companionable after a while and they both internally registered that something had just changed between them.
Suddenly Luke stood, his hand outstretched toward Reid. “How about a dance?”
“Excuse me?”
“Come on, we’re at a ball. I’m pretty sure dancing is required.”
“Why? I’m not the dancing type and I get the feeling you aren’t either.”
“Consider it an apology for starting a fight with you,” Luke said with a grin as he wiggled his fingers.
“Lucinda does keep telling me I need to get along with more of the board members, though I'm not sure this is what she had in mind,” Reid said dryly and remained seated.
“Well, if you want we can go back inside and you can make small talk with the others,” Luke laughed. Reid shot up from the bench, causing Luke’s laugh to grow. “Come on, just one dance.”
“Fine,” Reid sighed and Luke couldn’t tell if the resignation was faked or not. They held each other at a respectable distance, slightly stiff. They may have taken a step away from hating each other, but they really weren't anywhere near comfortable enough for this. “I feel like wear in some trite romantic comedy,” Reid said with a huff.
"What's life without a little fluff?" Luke teased. The smile Reid gave him was borderline thin and genuine and they fall into silence again. The stiffness in Luke's body didn't let up and he was beginning to realize how bad of an idea this really was as they swayed to the music filtering from an open window in silence. “I was supposed to be married in this tux,” he said after a few moments. The admission confused and surprised them both and Luke cleared his throat nervously. He wasn't meant to be here, not with this man and not in this suit. The thoughts weren't stop repeating himself in his head. This was wrong, yet it felt...right.
Reid had said nothing so Luke tried to focus on the orange pocket square sticking out from the doctor's black suit jacket. He had forgone a tie and left the top buttons of his white dress shirt unbuttoned. If he didn't feel a stab of guilt just thinking about it, Luke would have admitted Reid looked very attractive.
Suddenly a strange noise broke into the quiet and Luke realized a cell phone was vibrating. Reid quickly let go of Luke to fish his out and the young man wondered why he felt a little disappointed at the lack of contact. Reid flipped his phone open and the calm that had begun to settle over his face as they danced disappeared instantly and he began to scan the area around them.
“We should go inside,” he said tersely, placing a hand on the small of Luke’s back and steering him toward the door.
“What’s going on? Dr. Oliver?” He had never seen the older man look this terrified and it scared him. He dug his heels in slightly. “I’m not going until you tell me.”
Reid turned and the panic in his face almost made Luke regret his stubbornness. “Please, Luke,” he said softly. “I don’t want to see you hurt because of me.” The use of his name shocked Luke enough into moving.
As soon as they were inside Reid relaxed a little but still looked pale. “Stay here, I’ll be right back.” And just as Luke was about to protest, his own phone rang. He opened it without looking, his eyes locked on Reid’s retreating form.
“Luke Snyder.”
“Hey, it’s Kyle,” the familiar rough voice soothed Luke almost instantly. “I just got your message, you okay?”
“Yeah,” Luke assured him lightly as he walked over to a bench down the hall near the doors to the party. “I talked to my dad a bit after I called you. I think I’m getting better, but there’s something else I wanted to talk to you about, if you don’t mind.”
“Of course I don’t, that’s why I’m here.”
“So, the dream I had, the guy Noah turned into? He’s new in town and we’ve kind of started to get to know each other and-"
“You like him, don’t you?” Kyle asked and Luke wished he could see his face to know if he was smiling or not.
“I don’t know. He’s certainly interesting.” Down the hall Luke could see Reid showing Adam his phone, both of their faces dark with worry. “And the more I get to know him the more I want to know. It’s just…to even think about wanting to get to know another guy romantically, it feels like I’m betraying Noah. It just, it feels too soon. It's too soon, right?”
"You're not betraying him," Kyle said soothingly. "And honestly I don't know about it being too soon. You and Noah were having problems just before the attack."
"Yeah," Luke sighed as he watched Reid and Adam argue, their voices not quite loud enough to carry down the hall. Reid pointed toward where Luke sat and he quickly looked away.
"And maybe when he came home you would have made things right. Maybe you would have postponed things until after his tour, maybe after spending time together you would have fallen even more in love with him. But maybe you were and are ready to move on from him sooner than you think."
"That's a lot of maybes, Kyle." Luke said as he ran a hand through his hair.
"That's life. You know that better than anyone," Kyle replied.
"I guess." He paused, looking back to where the two men were still arguing. "How are you and Oliver doing?" He asked, changing the subject.
"Good, I just talked to him. He said they had a little memorial this morning and that they would be docking somewhere soon to celebrate the holiday." Movement caught his eye and Luke looked back up to see Reid walking toward him. "I've got ER duty tonight but I thought I'd call you on my break, you sounded really upset."
"You didn't have to spend your free time on me." Reid sat down next to him. But thank you, really. I needed to talk to you. I'll call you later about Thanksgiving, okay?"
"Alright," Kyle laughed. "See ya."
"Bye." Luke shut the phone slowly and snuck a glance at Reid as he dropped it into his jacket pocket. The doctor's head was tipped back, leaning against the wall behind them. "You okay?" He asked after a few minutes of silence.
“I’m so sorry,” the other man said instead of answering the question.
“For what?”
“For dragging you into my problems.”
“Well, it would help if I knew what was going on.” Luke’s voice carried a bit of frustration. "You looked pretty upset with Adam over there."
“The less you know the safer you’ll be, or so they tell me.”
“Who told you? Dr. Oliver-“
“Reid,” he interrupted suddenly.
“What?” Luke turned to stare at him.
“I think you’ve earned the right to call me by my first name. At the very least you’re probably going to earn it.” Luke couldn’t think of a response to this cryptic statement so he let the rest of his demands drop. Reid Oliver was turning into a very complicated man and Luke wasn’t sure if that was a good or a bad thing.
They sat in a slightly uncomfortable silence until Reid blew out a sigh. “Tell me about him,” he said as he brushed his fingers across the gold band on Luke’s left ring finger. Luke looked down at it, then rested his head on the wall; mirroring Reid's earlier position.
“Why did you want to become a neurosurgeon?” He asked Reid instead, who shook his head at the subject avoidance but seemed to think about the question anyway.
"I fell in love with the brain," he said simply and Luke snorted. "Think about it. Each one’s different but they’re all so amazing. It’s this tangled mass of grey spaghetti, it’s totally alien. It’s not much to look at with the naked eye, but it makes us walk and talk, think…remember…smell…love-" His voice hitched when their eyes met at this and they both quickly looked away, letting out twin sighs of embarrassed laughter. Reid’s voice softened as he continued to talk. “It produces the Sistine Chapel…and chocolate, theory of relativity, Godfather I and II…not so sure about III…what?”
Luke let out the breath he didn't realize he was holding. He could feel a genuine smile on his face and he thought he knew the feeling swelling in his chest: love. But it couldn’t be, not yet, no matter what everyone said. “It’s just…I’ve never heard the brain sound so beautiful.” Reid blushed slightly and Luke cursed when his heart thudded at the sight.
"Your turn. Tell me something about Noah," Reid said after Luke lapsed into silence. The blonde looked down, twisting the ring slightly.
"He was going to make movies when his tour was over," he said with a shaky voice. "We had made all these plans to move to D.C. so I could intern at the Smithsonian and he could work on a documentary about gays in the military." Luke shut his eyes and sighed. "He wanted to change the world."
Reid’s hand covered the one of Luke’s that spun the silver band in endless anxious circles. He opened his mouth to say something, but apparently thought better of it. Luke stared at their hands, so different a touch from when Reid blocked his punch, but not an unwelcome warmth.
Oh God, Luke thought as they sat listening to the music seeping out from the abandoned party. I’m falling for him.