random thoughts
10/15/2006 1:04 PM
hear apon my messed uplife
im trying to get all clear and i seem to messed up 4 any one to love me
or to let anylove me
or to even love
so to let people be with out me as they whish i see all beings with so much in theme even if they hurt me
it seems i beleive all im given
it seems i dont know the truth
1 i like to know why u talked anout me behind my back u only told steph that i was preg i really dont cAre WHOEM KNOWS know 2 u only said ur something like ahasmed that i sleeped with rob when he was a dick hole
3 how u said ryans gay when he clearly lovs pussy and being a manwhore to sevral sluts
my head is so messed up from my messsed up life and the past i cant even kill my self seems ppl think i want attion cant even see the real me all i ever need want was lov i got told i had that oh well ppl give up on me to easily im a mess i confess
i cant even stop cuting
im just sick of lies mislead hopes truths beings
i get diff info from all i just ewant to STAND UP 4 MYSELF SOMEthing i never done i lov u all and have allwase i just what no dramma no bull n to se whats reaL BET NONE OF THIS MAKES MEANING LIK MY HEART and how ppl walke over and think its funny
i just want it all over now im sick everything eating my soul......
lets see i have no life olther then ppl talking apon the computer
i seemed to get this no one will ever answer what i ask
i hate lies i hate fakeness
i hate being miss used
i think if ppl got my head my mind my life felt as i do there heads simpley go POP
i let things be but then ppl go stand up 4 ur self i should eiltherway i feel like a tool nAH a puppet with million of strings
that swing one way then anolther one thing im realy messed up
not normal
and ull give up on me preety easy im to much to handle
one thing if people dont want to be in something like certain dealings of my life realtionships
why in the frist place get ur self involded like WTF
do u think it will be cherrys and ballons or what ever makes u bloody happy
like dont go geting in my business in the first place acting like me ull make it worse like i said
i seem to hurt ppl ? they hurt me makeing me open about shit then talk about it to haunt me more?
like grr i hate most of the ways human beings seem to live like animals so much easyer u fuck whatever like most man and sluts
u eat,sleep ,plAY HUMANS R SICK
mostly seems from messed up rraltionships leading into the madness of the world i am sick of being so nice and crazy!!
leting people walk on me hi it says rug on my fourhead grrrrr
i like to meet some one like me hmm be interesting i could not talk to these 4 walls.....
like old habits die hard indeed
masterbation lol
cuting
were all human arnt we
are they all needs
r we just a mess awaiting to see how we come of r selfs
pitty exploers us
sorrowe feels us with depth i have no idead what im saying try and talk it out or talk to the walls
maybe envoke the all knowing
maybe i had some ppl really love me the best they could purely
maybe my self hate self worth of lies as a child belieiveing if were what we eat maybe were surely what we think of r selfs
what were told
make it seem normal maybe to go on with life as normal as possible
so think of the good times what there r none
god its like one mess with a millon in all confused complications
no end of its mess
like energy
neg energy it simply never dies
just goes on and on like the path of pervv men and abusive falters
i shall stop and say im so thank full for friends like gem so far away by like kinderd souls it just feels the holes
to get me then most
to be real then most
just makes me sane in moments were i simply fall apart over the breaking
thATS IT for now whoem ever reads this parts of my none world yet so full of dramam ekk <3
hear apon my messed uplife
im trying to get all clear and i seem to messed up 4 any one to love me
or to let anylove me
or to even love
so to let people be with out me as they whish i see all beings with so much in theme even if they hurt me
it seems i beleive all im given
it seems i dont know the truth
1 i like to know why u talked anout me behind my back u only told steph that i was preg i really dont cAre WHOEM KNOWS know 2 u only said ur something like ahasmed that i sleeped with rob when he was a dick hole
3 how u said ryans gay when he clearly lovs pussy and being a manwhore to sevral sluts
my head is so messed up from my messsed up life and the past i cant even kill my self seems ppl think i want attion cant even see the real me all i ever need want was lov i got told i had that oh well ppl give up on me to easily im a mess i confess
i cant even stop cuting
im just sick of lies mislead hopes truths beings
i get diff info from all i just ewant to STAND UP 4 MYSELF SOMEthing i never done i lov u all and have allwase i just what no dramma no bull n to se whats reaL BET NONE OF THIS MAKES MEANING LIK MY HEART and how ppl walke over and think its funny
i just want it all over now im sick everything eating my soul......
lets see i have no life olther then ppl talking apon the computer
i seemed to get this no one will ever answer what i ask
i hate lies i hate fakeness
i hate being miss used
i think if ppl got my head my mind my life felt as i do there heads simpley go POP
i let things be but then ppl go stand up 4 ur self i should eiltherway i feel like a tool nAH a puppet with million of strings
that swing one way then anolther one thing im realy messed up
not normal
and ull give up on me preety easy im to much to handle
one thing if people dont want to be in something like certain dealings of my life realtionships
why in the frist place get ur self involded like WTF
do u think it will be cherrys and ballons or what ever makes u bloody happy
like dont go geting in my business in the first place acting like me ull make it worse like i said
i seem to hurt ppl ? they hurt me makeing me open about shit then talk about it to haunt me more?
like grr i hate most of the ways human beings seem to live like animals so much easyer u fuck whatever like most man and sluts
u eat,sleep ,plAY HUMANS R SICK
mostly seems from messed up rraltionships leading into the madness of the world i am sick of being so nice and crazy!!
leting people walk on me hi it says rug on my fourhead grrrrr
i like to meet some one like me hmm be interesting i could not talk to these 4 walls.....
like old habits die hard indeed
masterbation lol
cuting
were all human arnt we
are they all needs
r we just a mess awaiting to see how we come of r selfs
pitty exploers us
sorrowe feels us with depth i have no idead what im saying try and talk it out or talk to the walls
maybe envoke the all knowing
maybe i had some ppl really love me the best they could purely
maybe my self hate self worth of lies as a child belieiveing if were what we eat maybe were surely what we think of r selfs
what were told
make it seem normal maybe to go on with life as normal as possible
so think of the good times what there r none
god its like one mess with a millon in all confused complications
no end of its mess
like energy
neg energy it simply never dies
just goes on and on like the path of pervv men and abusive falters
i shall stop and say im so thank full for friends like gem so far away by like kinderd souls it just feels the holes
to get me then most
to be real then most
just makes me sane in moments were i simply fall apart over the breaking
thATS IT for now whoem ever reads this parts of my none world yet so full of dramam ekk <3