what the hell
I know I feel like I'm falling apart lately on lots of levels. But the last couple of days at work - where I type constantly, and pretty much my only computer time - I have started to lose my ability to spell properly.
I read a lot. I write a lot. I have always had an absurdly large vocabulary, and my spelling is pretty good. And I've been touch-typing since middle school.
So why the FUCK have I been just completely fat-fingering and fucking up every other word? What the hell is going on? Am I this tired and frazzled that I can't even get my fingers to obey me? And of course it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. Anyone who can type very fast knows that the more you think about where your fingers should be is exactly how you start fucking up. So what is going on?! This is creepier to me than any of the other weird shit going on. Maybe because I'm such a psych nerd and know too much about weird psych disorders that do strange things to the way people type/read/think/spell.
Or am I somehow getting spellcheck lazy? Most of my time is spent on a device that is much smarter than I am and has weird auto-correct functions no matter what key I end up on. And most apps on a PC have a spellcheck built in - except for IE. WTF Microsoft?
Anyway, I'm in a weird headspace lately. But this has been bugging me for a couple of days and is getting more frustrating.
In other news - briefly - I've been sick for over a month. I broke a teammate at practice. We lost our first bout, and I expect we will lose our next one. I've been feeling better at scrimmage practice, but way worse at all skills/endurance practices. I haven't climbed - not counting the trip last week where I couldn't even get 6 feet up one 5.5 and couldn't complete another one - in over a month. Work is terrible and has been getting worse the last couple weeks. My parents are coming home in July. Undecided on whether this will be a relief or yet more stress. The kitties are cute and mostly well-behaved. I got a sewing machine and have been trying to ease myself into crafting with getting back to crocheting. I'm a mess.
I read a lot. I write a lot. I have always had an absurdly large vocabulary, and my spelling is pretty good. And I've been touch-typing since middle school.
So why the FUCK have I been just completely fat-fingering and fucking up every other word? What the hell is going on? Am I this tired and frazzled that I can't even get my fingers to obey me? And of course it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. Anyone who can type very fast knows that the more you think about where your fingers should be is exactly how you start fucking up. So what is going on?! This is creepier to me than any of the other weird shit going on. Maybe because I'm such a psych nerd and know too much about weird psych disorders that do strange things to the way people type/read/think/spell.
Or am I somehow getting spellcheck lazy? Most of my time is spent on a device that is much smarter than I am and has weird auto-correct functions no matter what key I end up on. And most apps on a PC have a spellcheck built in - except for IE. WTF Microsoft?
Anyway, I'm in a weird headspace lately. But this has been bugging me for a couple of days and is getting more frustrating.
In other news - briefly - I've been sick for over a month. I broke a teammate at practice. We lost our first bout, and I expect we will lose our next one. I've been feeling better at scrimmage practice, but way worse at all skills/endurance practices. I haven't climbed - not counting the trip last week where I couldn't even get 6 feet up one 5.5 and couldn't complete another one - in over a month. Work is terrible and has been getting worse the last couple weeks. My parents are coming home in July. Undecided on whether this will be a relief or yet more stress. The kitties are cute and mostly well-behaved. I got a sewing machine and have been trying to ease myself into crafting with getting back to crocheting. I'm a mess.