Masquerade
You remember.
The way he flirted me really led me on. It wasn't just me -- everyone else thought he was flirting, too. He only acted like that with me. He walked so close; went out of his way to see me; his arm always brushed against my own. Then there was, that smile and the way he laughed at all my jokes and how he was always watching me.
And then that time when he asked me out, wasn't that great?
Casey, you're going crazy, said my friends, trying to calm me down. And I didn't know why they were telling me to stop -- I was happy, and that's how I show my happiness, by grinning huge and making odd noises and telling everyone I see. My friends are ditzy. Things don't work out well, when Courtney tells Josh the "news" in an elaborated way, and he passes it on to me as I wander by my locker and looking for someone... And he has a pillow behind his head. Josh says I've got the story wrong.
He's got a girlfriend. Had her for a year, said Josh [Mark's best friend, my friend's ex boyfriend]. El tiene una novia.
A niece? A cousin? What are you talking about, what are you talking about.
A rush of motion and oh my god i thought he liked me but look im cool see how i play it off that'swhytheythinkidbegoodindramaclass and then I forget to go to my locker cuz im walking off with courtney playing cool trying not to cry and acting like im mad at her for making things ups [we're playing though] and mr coleman asks about that guy whod been bothering me and mara says are you alright? and of course i am, no worries!
I'm just fine, just like always.
And then I'm running to the bus and ohmygod what about the club meeting, so i take out the paper and hand it to that girl who's always in mrs. hagans class and is waiting for a ride, (shaniqua? maybe?) and run back to the bus where i make it just in time, just in time to sit down and grin and tell my friends about the good news and why i'm smiling so wide, why I'm not even able to talk, why I just break down and cry and don't stop talking notforasinglesecond and then it's 4:00 and the bus is at the stop, and i get off and into my mums car and we drive home, and then it's work work work work on the costume, i can't even turn on my computer and i can't sit on my bed and cry or think or feel and...
For the next six hours, I'm sowing pieces of fabric together, trying not to think that it's true. Snipping threads and ripping seams and resewing it inside-out.
We took a break some time in the middle, to dine at a table made of laquered oak wood. It's delicately arranged, a special occasion, with steak and salad and a fresh glass of wine at my place. I knew he was going to announce something, my father isn't hard to read. He said something, a prelude, which hurt me very deep (God gives us the desires of our hearts. What do I desire? I know. I know but that hurts, too). I acted surprised, anyway, when he grinned and told us that he'd printed out information on tour guides to Australia.
My father: He can talk and talk, but it is when he prints out his research, that's when we are going, yes, that's when it's real.
We'll go for a month, he says. A week in Hawaii and three Down Under. We'll go to Sydney. The outback. The reef. Then me, said Dad, when we go back to Houston, you can take a different route. To Japan. Hokkaido. Sapporo. The McGinty's. How is he so sure? Why did I think of my father's mentioning my heart's desire?
We finished the outfit at 1 am.
I went to sleep, and woke up three times. I had to shower, shave, all that -- so I was late to meet up with my friends. We were all there by 9:30, and it started to rain. Pouring. I dropped my bucket. We crowded into cars and got to the con late (we were lost!) by 11, and waited in line to register 'til 12. In the meantime, I drew on the characters for "Club Pleasure", with fresh-bought sharpies on my yellow kimono.
The con featured thousands of people, and far too many Inuyashas. I was dressed as Yumi from Chobits, not that people knew that Chobits had characters outside of Chi. I don't mind, though; I got some compliments, and I was comfortable and shopped and shopped. Being my first con, I was so excited! There were more costumes and less noise, a friendly and less pushy impersonal atmosphere. Conversations blossomed everywhere, because we were linked by those common bonds. All the outfits flattered the wearer - I had never understood before, because pictures don't quite show things the same. But the beauty comes from within the peron, the way they smile when they're noticed being special and the little quirks thrown into the costume which one wouldn't necessarily imagine to be vital, but in reality they are.
There was this one girl who cosplayed as Nash, and wow. That's all I could say! (Later, when I waited for a taxi, I met up with her and she gave me her aim sn. I felt honored). There was an Inuyasha group, where the Inuyasha had cat-contact-eyes and a Tetsusaiga true to size, and made of layered newspapers, well, I forgot what that technique is called... Sango was gorgeous, with a real-life Hirokutsu which took her days, she said. And then Miroku was perfect, just so understated and actually asian (it felt right, you know?) and there was a little boy who followed, Shippou, so young and adorable and short and... Kagome didn't look as nice, I suppose; how much can you do for a school uniform? But she looked like Kagome, and that's all that mattered.
I still won a prize. :)
Alexis showed up with her mum, and we immediately attacked the "Dealers Room". It's this huge hall that is packed with seemingly endless rows of merchandise. Japanese foods. Japanese weapons. Infinite dvds manga artbooks posters shirts plushies towels cells and even doujinshii -- which took me a long time to find, though I eventually did.
I bought a great number of things:
- Fruits Basket, "Special Fan Book" presented by K-DO [Yaoi doujin]
- Fruits Basket, "Healing Planet", presented by Miya Akiba[Yaoi doujin]
*(Note that these aren't even technically Shonen-ai-- It's just talking... Baka hentai worker, I asked for something that was "more like yaoi" and he said, "You want sex book?" and I said "NO!" and he like "Oh oh okay." Later, Karen R and I go back so she can buy her FF yaoi doujin, and I ask him if my books are actually yaoi, because I wasn't feeling the yaoi vibes, right? So he flips through it and says, oh nooo noo no!! This is definitely yaoi! I would not hope guy say that to me, not normal boys say that to each other!" and some guy next to me was cracking up. The worker continued, "If boy say that to me I no know what to say... I say thankyou and walk away fast!". I then picked up a rope and was looking at in amusement, trying to understand what a rope had to do with doujin, when the worker pulls out a book from under the counter and says "Ah, Japanese Bondage sex book" and starts flipping through the pages for me. I think I nearly died from shock, though Karen helped me out by making the poor man put away the book. This is also extremely hilarious because the worker never even thought to check for ID. Haha, score!)
- T-Shirt: Light blue "Sushi Neko" (Cats drawn on the faces of sushi. Cute!)
- Plushie: Omura Yumi! It's the character whom I cosplayed as.
- Comission: In my irrational glee of Con-ness, a characature of me.
- Pins: Three. 'Yaoi' 'Button Humorous Type 2' 'Vote Bison' and 'Destroy Bunny'.
- Won: a CD from Radio Keichii, because of my cute outfit!
- Signed: Duel Jewel and Camino on the back of my kimono jacket. YATTA!
After buying things, Alexis and I joined up all the Westside people in the Game Room (free). We played Super Smash Melee - and I sucked, yay! - and then Dance Dance Revolution extreme, which I got pretty good at. Though I still need more practice, I managed to beat out a couple of folks! Ha! ;)
Afterwards, we went to the Camino F.A.Q. (while searching for the room that played continuous animes) and were vastly amused. I even got to ask the band members two questions! I must say, the Q&A session was spectacular, because of the way we could interact -- God forbid any American celebrity to be interesting and unique! It was also fun that the questions had a very amusing tnoe to them, as they were a bit silly and prying and made everyone laugh. Here's what I asked them.
Question #1: How was your first kiss?
- H: Oishii-katta (Delicious! Haha.)
I went back to my seat, and rejoined Alexis... A couple questions were asked, and then this one "Do you like yaoi" to which everyone said NO! We don't do that (*denial*), they said, except for Hayu', who said that he did like to watch it.
This made us all crack up with laughter; especially the fact that the band members struggled to understand the question when it was translated.
I would like to point out at this moment that "hap-pyun" is not the amount of time it takes for Val to do his hair. His god-like, divinely flipped hair? C'mon -- fifteen minutes? Try fifteen hours. It's only fifteen minutes when he has people doing it for him. All his makeup, etc. You gotta admit that Camino looked mind-blowingly hot... Mmm, the squish makes me filled with joy!
(was just distracted by reading "healing planet" and translating it accordingly by what little i know: hiragana, and newly!, the kanji for "Kyo")
Anyway, Camino was asked another question- what do you want to be when you grow up? Val answered "Boxer". But it was misinterpreted by the translator, who misheard the word and instead of saying boxer, said... "Wife". It was true then! Val wanted to be a wife! Yatta! I now ditched my question for Ha-san (so you like to watch yaoi, eh... which ones?) and got a new one.
Question #2: If you had to be the wife of someone on this stage, who would it be?
Val said he would be the wife of Hya-chan; isn't that adorable? I would love to read (or write) a fanfic to go with that. Speaking of fanfic, I got into many a conversation with people who are - tada! - yaoi lovers. Err, people who love yaoi. Anyways, I am not so alone after all! In fact, Karen and I expressed our fair obsessions with it, and chatted about this endlessly as I ate a turkey sub (my meal of the day). We discussed many good pairings and the like. I also did this with the random woman who I bought pins from.
But anyway, back into the time sequence? After the Q&A, Camino signed autographs upstairs. I ran up, of course, and got in line. After a long wait and fun conversations with people who I didn't really know, I got the guys to sign the back of my jacket. Underneath "Club pleasure" is all of their names, like they're my personal harem or something! A gleeful dance!
At this point, though, I met up with my people and found out they intended to ditch the conventiom because they were bored (... I think they never found the anime movie room, and what can I say? Neither did I). Of course, being myself I had no desire to leave. This was my heaven. So, I wandered around for a bit hoping that I could get a ride - having completed the reception of Camino's signatures - and realizing that my fone was gone. I looked all over for it but to no avail. This really sucked for a number of reasons, the main one being that my phone was now gone.
Anyway, I found Karen and that's how I hung out with her for a couple more hours (5-7:30! Wow). We found a cosplay line, but it wasn't for the masquerade per se. It was just a bunch of people, dressed up and hoping to look cute enough to deserve a prize. I wanted to enter, but what did I have? Looks? No. I just had my acting; my outfit itself would not, could not be good enough. And there were other things to think of. I needed to get home somehow, and so I called my parents on Karen's phone, and I told them I needed a ride.
They told me to get a taxi.
I took an hour and a half for my ride to arrive; and even then, it wasn't a taxi that I found, but a driver, a concierge for the Sheraton hotel! I couldn't believe my parents would leave me to deal with that, to make me pay for that expense when I needed a ride.
Whatever happened to,
"If something bad happens, and you're stranded somewhere, go to a secure place and call us. No matter what time of night or where you are, we'll go pick you up"
?
Becauase you know what, I believed in that. Then I was stranded, and so upset because it's not right for a parent to leave a fifteen year old to get a taxi home, when it was only 8:30 and they couldn't have had that much to do. But the driver was friendly, and I talked to him about a lot of things; you know how they always start up conversations and confessionals.
The driver kept on saying, "You're still a baby!" and I told him his job demanded integrity. Waking up at all hours of the night, that's amazing you know.
I got home. My mum pursed her lips and complained at the price. I went upstairs again and looked at my outfit, taking it off and throwing it into my bucket. A couple of things had become unraveled from the days' wear.
So here I am again.
Snipping threads and ripping seams and crying my heart out.
The way he flirted me really led me on. It wasn't just me -- everyone else thought he was flirting, too. He only acted like that with me. He walked so close; went out of his way to see me; his arm always brushed against my own. Then there was, that smile and the way he laughed at all my jokes and how he was always watching me.
And then that time when he asked me out, wasn't that great?
Casey, you're going crazy, said my friends, trying to calm me down. And I didn't know why they were telling me to stop -- I was happy, and that's how I show my happiness, by grinning huge and making odd noises and telling everyone I see. My friends are ditzy. Things don't work out well, when Courtney tells Josh the "news" in an elaborated way, and he passes it on to me as I wander by my locker and looking for someone... And he has a pillow behind his head. Josh says I've got the story wrong.
He's got a girlfriend. Had her for a year, said Josh [Mark's best friend, my friend's ex boyfriend]. El tiene una novia.
A niece? A cousin? What are you talking about, what are you talking about.
A rush of motion and oh my god i thought he liked me but look im cool see how i play it off that'swhytheythinkidbegoodindramaclass and then I forget to go to my locker cuz im walking off with courtney playing cool trying not to cry and acting like im mad at her for making things ups [we're playing though] and mr coleman asks about that guy whod been bothering me and mara says are you alright? and of course i am, no worries!
I'm just fine, just like always.
And then I'm running to the bus and ohmygod what about the club meeting, so i take out the paper and hand it to that girl who's always in mrs. hagans class and is waiting for a ride, (shaniqua? maybe?) and run back to the bus where i make it just in time, just in time to sit down and grin and tell my friends about the good news and why i'm smiling so wide, why I'm not even able to talk, why I just break down and cry and don't stop talking notforasinglesecond and then it's 4:00 and the bus is at the stop, and i get off and into my mums car and we drive home, and then it's work work work work on the costume, i can't even turn on my computer and i can't sit on my bed and cry or think or feel and...
For the next six hours, I'm sowing pieces of fabric together, trying not to think that it's true. Snipping threads and ripping seams and resewing it inside-out.
We took a break some time in the middle, to dine at a table made of laquered oak wood. It's delicately arranged, a special occasion, with steak and salad and a fresh glass of wine at my place. I knew he was going to announce something, my father isn't hard to read. He said something, a prelude, which hurt me very deep (God gives us the desires of our hearts. What do I desire? I know. I know but that hurts, too). I acted surprised, anyway, when he grinned and told us that he'd printed out information on tour guides to Australia.
My father: He can talk and talk, but it is when he prints out his research, that's when we are going, yes, that's when it's real.
We'll go for a month, he says. A week in Hawaii and three Down Under. We'll go to Sydney. The outback. The reef. Then me, said Dad, when we go back to Houston, you can take a different route. To Japan. Hokkaido. Sapporo. The McGinty's. How is he so sure? Why did I think of my father's mentioning my heart's desire?
We finished the outfit at 1 am.
I went to sleep, and woke up three times. I had to shower, shave, all that -- so I was late to meet up with my friends. We were all there by 9:30, and it started to rain. Pouring. I dropped my bucket. We crowded into cars and got to the con late (we were lost!) by 11, and waited in line to register 'til 12. In the meantime, I drew on the characters for "Club Pleasure", with fresh-bought sharpies on my yellow kimono.
The con featured thousands of people, and far too many Inuyashas. I was dressed as Yumi from Chobits, not that people knew that Chobits had characters outside of Chi. I don't mind, though; I got some compliments, and I was comfortable and shopped and shopped. Being my first con, I was so excited! There were more costumes and less noise, a friendly and less pushy impersonal atmosphere. Conversations blossomed everywhere, because we were linked by those common bonds. All the outfits flattered the wearer - I had never understood before, because pictures don't quite show things the same. But the beauty comes from within the peron, the way they smile when they're noticed being special and the little quirks thrown into the costume which one wouldn't necessarily imagine to be vital, but in reality they are.
There was this one girl who cosplayed as Nash, and wow. That's all I could say! (Later, when I waited for a taxi, I met up with her and she gave me her aim sn. I felt honored). There was an Inuyasha group, where the Inuyasha had cat-contact-eyes and a Tetsusaiga true to size, and made of layered newspapers, well, I forgot what that technique is called... Sango was gorgeous, with a real-life Hirokutsu which took her days, she said. And then Miroku was perfect, just so understated and actually asian (it felt right, you know?) and there was a little boy who followed, Shippou, so young and adorable and short and... Kagome didn't look as nice, I suppose; how much can you do for a school uniform? But she looked like Kagome, and that's all that mattered.
I still won a prize. :)
Alexis showed up with her mum, and we immediately attacked the "Dealers Room". It's this huge hall that is packed with seemingly endless rows of merchandise. Japanese foods. Japanese weapons. Infinite dvds manga artbooks posters shirts plushies towels cells and even doujinshii -- which took me a long time to find, though I eventually did.
I bought a great number of things:
- Fruits Basket, "Special Fan Book" presented by K-DO [Yaoi doujin]
- Fruits Basket, "Healing Planet", presented by Miya Akiba[Yaoi doujin]
*(Note that these aren't even technically Shonen-ai-- It's just talking... Baka hentai worker, I asked for something that was "more like yaoi" and he said, "You want sex book?" and I said "NO!" and he like "Oh oh okay." Later, Karen R and I go back so she can buy her FF yaoi doujin, and I ask him if my books are actually yaoi, because I wasn't feeling the yaoi vibes, right? So he flips through it and says, oh nooo noo no!! This is definitely yaoi! I would not hope guy say that to me, not normal boys say that to each other!" and some guy next to me was cracking up. The worker continued, "If boy say that to me I no know what to say... I say thankyou and walk away fast!". I then picked up a rope and was looking at in amusement, trying to understand what a rope had to do with doujin, when the worker pulls out a book from under the counter and says "Ah, Japanese Bondage sex book" and starts flipping through the pages for me. I think I nearly died from shock, though Karen helped me out by making the poor man put away the book. This is also extremely hilarious because the worker never even thought to check for ID. Haha, score!)
- T-Shirt: Light blue "Sushi Neko" (Cats drawn on the faces of sushi. Cute!)
- Plushie: Omura Yumi! It's the character whom I cosplayed as.
- Comission: In my irrational glee of Con-ness, a characature of me.
- Pins: Three. 'Yaoi' 'Button Humorous Type 2' 'Vote Bison' and 'Destroy Bunny'.
- Won: a CD from Radio Keichii, because of my cute outfit!
- Signed: Duel Jewel and Camino on the back of my kimono jacket. YATTA!
After buying things, Alexis and I joined up all the Westside people in the Game Room (free). We played Super Smash Melee - and I sucked, yay! - and then Dance Dance Revolution extreme, which I got pretty good at. Though I still need more practice, I managed to beat out a couple of folks! Ha! ;)
Afterwards, we went to the Camino F.A.Q. (while searching for the room that played continuous animes) and were vastly amused. I even got to ask the band members two questions! I must say, the Q&A session was spectacular, because of the way we could interact -- God forbid any American celebrity to be interesting and unique! It was also fun that the questions had a very amusing tnoe to them, as they were a bit silly and prying and made everyone laugh. Here's what I asked them.
Question #1: How was your first kiss?
- H: Oishii-katta (Delicious! Haha.)
I went back to my seat, and rejoined Alexis... A couple questions were asked, and then this one "Do you like yaoi" to which everyone said NO! We don't do that (*denial*), they said, except for Hayu', who said that he did like to watch it.
This made us all crack up with laughter; especially the fact that the band members struggled to understand the question when it was translated.
I would like to point out at this moment that "hap-pyun" is not the amount of time it takes for Val to do his hair. His god-like, divinely flipped hair? C'mon -- fifteen minutes? Try fifteen hours. It's only fifteen minutes when he has people doing it for him. All his makeup, etc. You gotta admit that Camino looked mind-blowingly hot... Mmm, the squish makes me filled with joy!
(was just distracted by reading "healing planet" and translating it accordingly by what little i know: hiragana, and newly!, the kanji for "Kyo")
Anyway, Camino was asked another question- what do you want to be when you grow up? Val answered "Boxer". But it was misinterpreted by the translator, who misheard the word and instead of saying boxer, said... "Wife". It was true then! Val wanted to be a wife! Yatta! I now ditched my question for Ha-san (so you like to watch yaoi, eh... which ones?) and got a new one.
Question #2: If you had to be the wife of someone on this stage, who would it be?
Val said he would be the wife of Hya-chan; isn't that adorable? I would love to read (or write) a fanfic to go with that. Speaking of fanfic, I got into many a conversation with people who are - tada! - yaoi lovers. Err, people who love yaoi. Anyways, I am not so alone after all! In fact, Karen and I expressed our fair obsessions with it, and chatted about this endlessly as I ate a turkey sub (my meal of the day). We discussed many good pairings and the like. I also did this with the random woman who I bought pins from.
But anyway, back into the time sequence? After the Q&A, Camino signed autographs upstairs. I ran up, of course, and got in line. After a long wait and fun conversations with people who I didn't really know, I got the guys to sign the back of my jacket. Underneath "Club pleasure" is all of their names, like they're my personal harem or something! A gleeful dance!
At this point, though, I met up with my people and found out they intended to ditch the conventiom because they were bored (... I think they never found the anime movie room, and what can I say? Neither did I). Of course, being myself I had no desire to leave. This was my heaven. So, I wandered around for a bit hoping that I could get a ride - having completed the reception of Camino's signatures - and realizing that my fone was gone. I looked all over for it but to no avail. This really sucked for a number of reasons, the main one being that my phone was now gone.
Anyway, I found Karen and that's how I hung out with her for a couple more hours (5-7:30! Wow). We found a cosplay line, but it wasn't for the masquerade per se. It was just a bunch of people, dressed up and hoping to look cute enough to deserve a prize. I wanted to enter, but what did I have? Looks? No. I just had my acting; my outfit itself would not, could not be good enough. And there were other things to think of. I needed to get home somehow, and so I called my parents on Karen's phone, and I told them I needed a ride.
They told me to get a taxi.
I took an hour and a half for my ride to arrive; and even then, it wasn't a taxi that I found, but a driver, a concierge for the Sheraton hotel! I couldn't believe my parents would leave me to deal with that, to make me pay for that expense when I needed a ride.
Whatever happened to,
"If something bad happens, and you're stranded somewhere, go to a secure place and call us. No matter what time of night or where you are, we'll go pick you up"
?
Becauase you know what, I believed in that. Then I was stranded, and so upset because it's not right for a parent to leave a fifteen year old to get a taxi home, when it was only 8:30 and they couldn't have had that much to do. But the driver was friendly, and I talked to him about a lot of things; you know how they always start up conversations and confessionals.
The driver kept on saying, "You're still a baby!" and I told him his job demanded integrity. Waking up at all hours of the night, that's amazing you know.
I got home. My mum pursed her lips and complained at the price. I went upstairs again and looked at my outfit, taking it off and throwing it into my bucket. A couple of things had become unraveled from the days' wear.
So here I am again.
Snipping threads and ripping seams and crying my heart out.