If You And I Had Been Anything Less Than These Tourmented Souls We Would Never Have Gone So Far
It wasn’t unusual but it still didn’t feel right. That feeling in your gut where you’re obligated to be somewhere or do something even if to the depths of your soul you know it’s not right. It’s hard to sit still when I’m like that, and this crusty old chair isn’t providing any comfort besides the fact that I’m off my feet for more than five minutes. Squirming to find a position that doesn’t redirect the pain from my feet and legs to my back and butt, it’s nice to finally take a look at what we’ve got here. The room itself isn’t as mangy as most of the places we are forced to seek shelter in. But no matter how many times we sit in a room lit by a mere 40 watts and search for the only spot on the walls where the paper fails to peel, I have never, could never, grow accustomed to it. At least the Motor Inn 6 smells of stale corn chips instead of mold. He never cares where we stay, just finds the first place he can when he’s decided I’ve had enough for the day. Never mind if I get a say in it, granted I am a mere girl after all.
Roland is all brawn and no brains, a definite he-man of the 21st century. He does have his moments of enlightenment when an idea that is truly worthwhile does sprout up but in essence his built like a shit brick house body does all the work. I’ve known him for years, and even now with his body sprawled across the thin comforter of the mattress with his six foot four inch frame making his legs dangle over the edge I still picture the kid I once knew. Now ten years later and growing into man hood at 26 I’m just now starting to see him as the adult he’s become.
“Season!” I snapped my head up from an apparent daydream, the tone in his voice dripping with annoyance “You finally with me yeah?”
“Yes, sorry… what is it?”
“We’re leaving tomorrow 5 a.m. no exceptions I want to be on our feet as the sun rises, we have to make up for lost time.”
I didn’t say anything but the rumble in my throat and death stare was enough to make his ice blue eyes dart away. I slumped out of my chair and crossed the front of the bed to the single duffle bag on the floor. After rummaging through for the cleanliest articles available I headed for the bathroom.
“The light switch doesn’t work Easy, so you’ll have to leave the door open if you plan on seeing what you’re washing!”
It never seems to amazing me how his mood changes. Five seconds ago he was a military officer barking orders about when to arise, and now his voice was light and fluffy with humor that I feel is uncalled for.
“I hope you don’t plan on peeking. Granted if you do I feel you might go blind, which is punishment enough for you.”
I’ve always had low self esteem. I would never compare to myself to the girls you see on MTV reality shows with the blonde hair and bikini bods. Unlike them I had hips and breasts and lots of them. Crimson colored hair that sparkled in the sun and fell in waves down to my waist that I refuse to cut or color. Unpopular green eyes and a sharp nose dominated my face. I wouldn’t say that I looked unpleasant but I was absolutely not a prize to be won.
“Please woman, you know that I’ve been lusting after you this past decade. Why else would I stick around?”
“Why don’t you make yourself useful and go find a place to do some wash or better yet, anything that doesn’t have to do with your vocal chords being functional.”
I felt odd having to undress in the unlit bathroom and barley seeing through the light that crept around the corner from the open door. Turning on the water to scolding hot, I found the small hotel supplied generic soaps and my teeth began to chatter from being cold. The shower stall was dingy, the curtain barley covering the opening, but I tugged it as far over as I could once I got in. The water felt spectacular, burning my wee toes and turning my sensitive pale skin red instantly upon contact. Peeling the paper off the slice of soap and letting it fall to the ground I rubbed it between my fingers. I couldn’t clean anything else if my hands weren’t clean. I hated being dirty, nothing displeases me more. “So Easy, I was thinking…” except that, I wanted to enjoy my shower Roland free.
Roland is all brawn and no brains, a definite he-man of the 21st century. He does have his moments of enlightenment when an idea that is truly worthwhile does sprout up but in essence his built like a shit brick house body does all the work. I’ve known him for years, and even now with his body sprawled across the thin comforter of the mattress with his six foot four inch frame making his legs dangle over the edge I still picture the kid I once knew. Now ten years later and growing into man hood at 26 I’m just now starting to see him as the adult he’s become.
“Season!” I snapped my head up from an apparent daydream, the tone in his voice dripping with annoyance “You finally with me yeah?”
“Yes, sorry… what is it?”
“We’re leaving tomorrow 5 a.m. no exceptions I want to be on our feet as the sun rises, we have to make up for lost time.”
I didn’t say anything but the rumble in my throat and death stare was enough to make his ice blue eyes dart away. I slumped out of my chair and crossed the front of the bed to the single duffle bag on the floor. After rummaging through for the cleanliest articles available I headed for the bathroom.
“The light switch doesn’t work Easy, so you’ll have to leave the door open if you plan on seeing what you’re washing!”
It never seems to amazing me how his mood changes. Five seconds ago he was a military officer barking orders about when to arise, and now his voice was light and fluffy with humor that I feel is uncalled for.
“I hope you don’t plan on peeking. Granted if you do I feel you might go blind, which is punishment enough for you.”
I’ve always had low self esteem. I would never compare to myself to the girls you see on MTV reality shows with the blonde hair and bikini bods. Unlike them I had hips and breasts and lots of them. Crimson colored hair that sparkled in the sun and fell in waves down to my waist that I refuse to cut or color. Unpopular green eyes and a sharp nose dominated my face. I wouldn’t say that I looked unpleasant but I was absolutely not a prize to be won.
“Please woman, you know that I’ve been lusting after you this past decade. Why else would I stick around?”
“Why don’t you make yourself useful and go find a place to do some wash or better yet, anything that doesn’t have to do with your vocal chords being functional.”
I felt odd having to undress in the unlit bathroom and barley seeing through the light that crept around the corner from the open door. Turning on the water to scolding hot, I found the small hotel supplied generic soaps and my teeth began to chatter from being cold. The shower stall was dingy, the curtain barley covering the opening, but I tugged it as far over as I could once I got in. The water felt spectacular, burning my wee toes and turning my sensitive pale skin red instantly upon contact. Peeling the paper off the slice of soap and letting it fall to the ground I rubbed it between my fingers. I couldn’t clean anything else if my hands weren’t clean. I hated being dirty, nothing displeases me more. “So Easy, I was thinking…” except that, I wanted to enjoy my shower Roland free.