I Feel Just Like A Beat Up Truck; I Turn The Engine But The Engine Doesn't Turn
why i keep quoting this song, i don't know. but it's one of those ones that run pretty much constantly through my head. it wars with various other artists, Jackson, Prince, Vandross, Butler, blah blah blah but that song, Wonderwall & friggin Clarity are almost always on constant repeat.
see? right now, Mayer does a funky little riff on his sexy little guitar and suddenly i know nothing about no headlights.
if you don't know the songs i'm talking about, worry not. it's not important.
i always feel guilty, you know, when i come back to LJ after a couple of days. i start off pretty well, reading, laughing, composing my oh-so-witty-and-appreciated comments, but then the guilt sets in.
"i still have like, 15 comments from last week i haven't witty-ly replied to," i think to myself. "those people are counting on me to validate their LJxistence, i can't just start randomly dropping comments on new shit without replying to the old, first!"
so then, i go back to my gmail and find all those comments and then i'm like... "oh. pretty much, i was all witty-ied out. lj user=so and so probably would not appreciate at all me reminding her/him of that particular convo. maybe it's okay that i don't respond."
so then! i go back to my flist and start the process all over again. and i may get through, oh, like, a day or sos posts, and i then think "man, fuck this! i got stuff *I* wanna post about. see, omg, i can't believe funjoey loves caramel cake, that's like the best EVER and i haven't made one in forEVER and duuuuuuuuuude i should so comment to let him know but like, that would mean i'd have to go back and comment on everyone's posts i wanted to comment on which would mean that i couldn't post about my amazing life and isn't that the POINT of LJ??? to talk about ME??? omg what a narcissistic bitch i am."
so.
yeah.
here i am, being neglectful of a weeks' worth of comments and a weekends' worth of lj posts by my very much adored LJ friend list. oh the shame of the selfish. this is one tough load to bear, i need you to believe me on this.
i have not had sex in several days and i'm practically bouncing off the walls. i finished punctuating early and everything. WHY NO SEX, man?!
i have purchased like, a gazillion dollars worth of office supplies/products in the last week, and this makes me so deliriously happy, i'm ALMOST orgasmic over it.
okay, so i had a tiny orgasm.
i hate those.
Felecia invited me to chill with her for the high school reunion. still not sure if i'd like to attend seeing as i'm being reminded of some people i realleh truleh disliked. i don't necessarily want to see them. sigh. it's not that damned big a deal.
my back still hates me. i'm trying not to stress over it.
i now, on top of everything else, am pretty sure i have a bladder infection.
how can one person go from having perfect health fall completely apart in less than a year?!!!!
i've never had the measles, the mumps, the chicken pox, or malaria. never broken a bone. i rarely catch cold, and have had the flu maybe a total of like, 4 times in my life.
suddenly my back hates me, my anemia is kicking in big time, and now i've got bladder issues.
fuck you, health.
hey. gee. i'm SO happy i took the time to post this!
on an up note. i found some more of my old writing. and i got excited.
i'm more excited about what i might get to do tonight, though.
so.terribly.excited.
see? right now, Mayer does a funky little riff on his sexy little guitar and suddenly i know nothing about no headlights.
if you don't know the songs i'm talking about, worry not. it's not important.
i always feel guilty, you know, when i come back to LJ after a couple of days. i start off pretty well, reading, laughing, composing my oh-so-witty-and-appreciated comments, but then the guilt sets in.
"i still have like, 15 comments from last week i haven't witty-ly replied to," i think to myself. "those people are counting on me to validate their LJxistence, i can't just start randomly dropping comments on new shit without replying to the old, first!"
so then, i go back to my gmail and find all those comments and then i'm like... "oh. pretty much, i was all witty-ied out. lj user=so and so probably would not appreciate at all me reminding her/him of that particular convo. maybe it's okay that i don't respond."
so then! i go back to my flist and start the process all over again. and i may get through, oh, like, a day or sos posts, and i then think "man, fuck this! i got stuff *I* wanna post about. see, omg, i can't believe funjoey loves caramel cake, that's like the best EVER and i haven't made one in forEVER and duuuuuuuuuude i should so comment to let him know but like, that would mean i'd have to go back and comment on everyone's posts i wanted to comment on which would mean that i couldn't post about my amazing life and isn't that the POINT of LJ??? to talk about ME??? omg what a narcissistic bitch i am."
so.
yeah.
here i am, being neglectful of a weeks' worth of comments and a weekends' worth of lj posts by my very much adored LJ friend list. oh the shame of the selfish. this is one tough load to bear, i need you to believe me on this.
i have not had sex in several days and i'm practically bouncing off the walls. i finished punctuating early and everything. WHY NO SEX, man?!
i have purchased like, a gazillion dollars worth of office supplies/products in the last week, and this makes me so deliriously happy, i'm ALMOST orgasmic over it.
okay, so i had a tiny orgasm.
i hate those.
Felecia invited me to chill with her for the high school reunion. still not sure if i'd like to attend seeing as i'm being reminded of some people i realleh truleh disliked. i don't necessarily want to see them. sigh. it's not that damned big a deal.
my back still hates me. i'm trying not to stress over it.
i now, on top of everything else, am pretty sure i have a bladder infection.
how can one person go from having perfect health fall completely apart in less than a year?!!!!
i've never had the measles, the mumps, the chicken pox, or malaria. never broken a bone. i rarely catch cold, and have had the flu maybe a total of like, 4 times in my life.
suddenly my back hates me, my anemia is kicking in big time, and now i've got bladder issues.
fuck you, health.
hey. gee. i'm SO happy i took the time to post this!
on an up note. i found some more of my old writing. and i got excited.
i'm more excited about what i might get to do tonight, though.
so.terribly.excited.