Endings and Beginnings 10/? (TEAOW&S)
TITLE: "Endings and Beginnings" 10/?
SERIES: TEAOW&S
AUTHOR:Laure Alexander
EMAIL: lara@sunflower.com
RATING: NC17 overall
SPOILERS: Set eighteen then twenty years in the future of the series. If you've never read any of TEAOW&S, you'll be confused.
SUMMARY: For twenty years, the five way bond between the vampires and humans has been strong, the Family has grown close and loving, everything has been right in a world with the Hellmouth closed...until something happens to threaten everything they've built together.
CONTENT:sex, violence overall; this chapter has a bit of language and that's about it...oh, and me being evil, but that's a given.
DISCLAIMER:I don't own Buffy and friends or Buffy the Vampire Slayer; they're owned by Joss Whedon and Fox, I assume. No copyright infringement intended so please don't sue.
Sitting in a chair, fingers steepled and legs stretched out in front of him, Angel watched his lover sleep. She was restless, turning again and again beneath the sheet, and he wondered if her dreams were prophetic.
Buffy hadn't had a prophetic dream in nearly two decades.
They could use a prophecy about now.
Buffy was having a problem with his decision to turn Willow.
Far into the morning they'd talked and argued and even come to blows, but had resolved nothing. In the end, their anger and frustration had turned to passion and finally to grief, and he'd held her while she cried for Spike and Willow. Finally she'd slipped into sleep and he'd left their bed to seek out Drusilla.
Unfortunately his daughter wasn't making any sense and the blackened emerald--her constant companion--was burning a pattern into her palm which left her even more confused. When Angel had tried to take it from her, she'd thrown a screaming fit, and he'd given up.
A phone call to the hospital had told him that Willow was doing fine and would be released that evening if her condition remained unchanged. Another phone call to Giles had informed him that Rose was spending the day at the hospital with her mother and her siblings and grandparents were on their way back to town to be told about Spike's death. Giles had actually sounded sorry about their loss, but Angel figured it was more concern for Willow than caring for any of the vampires. He'd gotten used to the Watcher's quiet dislike over the last two decades and it didn't bother him. He didn't like the human either.
Finally he'd made one more phone call, one that went unanswered, and, a part of him was relieved.
Because if Conor had answered, he wasn't certain he wouldn't threaten to kill the boy.
Rationally he knew his son had no reason to believe a bullet wouldn't do more than knock down a vampire. No one had ever told the children about the damage to Spike's heart or the reason Spike needed not only Willow's blood but his own on a regular basis. Conor hadn't known. Angel couldn't blame him.
Angelus, on the other hand, could, did, and wanted the boy bleeding at his feet.
For the last five hours he'd sat in this chair, unable to sleep, brooding as he hadn't since he'd had his damn soul, waiting for Buffy to wake up. He missed Spike. He missed his son. He was facing a bloody fight over Willow.
And the Hellmouth could open at any minute and swallow them whole.
Twenty years of peace and happiness weren't enough. He wanted more.
He wanted Spike back.
*****
Alone at last, Willow rested her weary head against the pillows and closed her eyes. Her parents were taking Derek and Thea home with them to stay for a few more days until things calmed down at the mansion.
Her parents had been stoic, naturally, comforting the children as she told them all in halting words about Spike's death. While they'd liked their son-in-law, the fact he was a vampire had never been something they'd ever really understood. They'd been content to know he loved their daughter and their grandchildren and never really thought about the details. Willow had to explain about the pre-existing damage to his heart, and that had led to the reason he drank her blood.
Again, her family knew that--the scars were unmistakable--but they'd never given it any thought.
Her explanation of the bond, though, had finally broken her parents. It had taken an hour of crying and talking for them to regain enough control to comfort their grandchildren. While she'd joined in the crying, Willow had kept a close eye on Rose who had sat beside her quietly through the whole discussion, only reaching out once to squeeze Thea's hand as the younger girl had sobbed over her daddy's death.
At the news that Willow would soon follow him to the grave, Rose had gone white and still and hadn't made a sound.
Willow knew that the girl was in shock not only because she was losing her mother but because she was being elevated to the Five.
And she wasn't ready.
*****
As she headed for Willow's room, Buffy saw Rose in the waiting room and gave her a quizzical look. "Honey, your mom thinks you're with your grandparents and brother and sister."
"I couldn't leave her." Standing, Rose arched her stiff back and joined the older woman. "She told us...everything."
"Yeah, she told me when I called. I'm so sorry, Rose."
"It's just...one more unreal thing, you know? I can't believe it. I can't believe they never told us."
"We never..." Buffy sighed softly. "We thought we had time, decades, and that we'd lose Willow first to old age."
"I tried to call Conor a couple dozen times but my fingers froze. I can't tell him this over the phone. I'm just so afraid he'll blame himself for this, too."
Knowing her son, he would, but Buffy only took the girl's hand and led her to her mother's hospital room.
Willow was dressed and brushing her hair. An orderly followed them in with a wheelchair. "Rose?"
"I couldn't leave you."
"Okay. We can drop you off at grandma and grandpa's."
"No, I'm not going there. They have their hands full with Derek and Thea."
"Then Giles and Jenny's."
Rose shook her head. "I'm going home with you."
"Um, Will, I'm taking you to Giles' place unless you want to go to your parents'," Buffy said, frowning.
"I'm going home, Buffy." She levered herself into the wheelchair and they all left the room.
"Not a good idea."
"It's my home, but, no, Rose, I want you to go back to Giles'."
"No."
All three women frowned at each other, but couldn't go into more detailed arguments in front of the orderly.
Once they were in the car, Buffy turned to Willow and shrugged. "So, where?"
"Giles."
"No, mom, I'm serious. I want to spend all the time we have left with you."
Buffy gave her a concerned look before she started the engine. "I can't guarantee you won't be in danger."
"I can take care of myself, and if Angel is really determined to hurt me, he'll get to me wherever I stay."
"He can't get into either of those other houses."
"He can lure me out with threats. Look, I've given this a lot of thought and I'm going home with mom."
"Jeez, she's as stubborn as you, Will."
Willow sighed.
*****
It was evening and the Family was awake, fed, and restless. Buffy started to help Willow up to her rooms but she stopped her with a shake of her head.
"I need to talk to Angel."
"Also, not a good idea, Will."
"Buffy, please. Could you have him join me in the living room?"
"If you're insistent on talking to him, why not after I get you settled in bed?"
"In the hopes he'll have gone out to hunt for the rest of the night?" A ghost of a smile crossed Willow's face and she shook her head. "He won't hurt me and I have to talk to him."
Nodding in resignation, Buffy headed up the stairs.
Angel was seated at his desk signing checks but he glanced up when Buffy entered. "She came home."
"She wants to talk to you downstairs." Crossing her arms over her chest, Buffy gave him a belligerent look.
"Are you going to interfere?" he asked as he rose to his feet, the menace beginning to fall over him as he walked towards her.
"Will it do any good?"
"No."
Buffy looked away from him, trying to ignore the pain in her heart. "Rose is home, too. Stay the fuck away from her."
The hand wrapping in her hair to yank back her head, made her wince, but then he kissed her with all the love he felt for her, and she melted into his arms.
*****
Angel found Willow standing in front of the fireplace, her eyes locked on the bowl Penn had used for Spike's remains.
"You can feel him in there, can't you."
Nodding, she turned to face him. He was only a few feet from her, but then moved to sit on his throne and she followed him to stand in front of him. "I assume Buffy told you I only have ten days before the thirty are up." At his nod, she continued, a serene if sorrowful look in her eyes and her hands clasped over the mound of her stomach. "That seventeenth century journal we found fifteen years ago showed us there's one way to prevent it or stop it once it's begun. I won't take that route, Angel."
His eyes narrowed and his response came in a growl, "I won't give you that choice."
"Yes, you will. I won't become a vampire."
"We're not going to lose you, too."
"You always were going to, Angel. I'm mortal. That's why I have children, to carry on for me. The bond will pass to Rose. She's still my successor. If something happens to her, it'll pass to one of her siblings. It's the way it is. None of us will live forever."
"It's too soon," he ground out, his hands wrapping around the arms of his throne. "Your death will do irreparable harm to the Family. I won't allow it."
"The Family will survive. It always does. The bond passed to Nick, just as it was meant to. You should take him as your second in command." At his look of near-guilt, she nearly smiled. " And you already have. Don't worry, I don't blame you. Spike wouldn't either."
Something broke on the vampire's face and she moved to sit on the stool in front of him and to one side. It used to bother her that it was the a submissive position but that had stopped a long time ago. "He wouldn't, Angel. He loved you and he knew you better than you know yourself. You need a strong second, especially now."
"I'm not betraying him, I know that," he said gruffly, "But, everything is just happening too fast. Ten days isn't long enough, Willow."
"It's what I have. I'll admit it, I'm scared, but not enough to let you or any of the others turn me. We have no way of knowing if I'll care at all for any of you. I won't risk the danger to my kids and, if I can't love them, I don't want them forced to see me alive but not."
"Aurelian childer love, it's our curse and a part of the prophecy."
"Yeah, but you all had so many years to grow into it. I'd be fresh and raw and evil and way too dangerous. I can't do that to my kids, or to Buffy, and, really, Angel, do you want me to be a vampire?"
Their eyes met for a long moment and then he slowly shook his head. "No, but I don't want you gone either."
It was a telling admission and she almost smiled, instead reaching out and taking one of his hands. "And in the end it's not what Spike wanted and you'll respect that, won't you."
Angel frowned but finally conceded. "I hate this, and, Willow, if you change your mind and ask me, I'll turn you in an instant."
"I won't ask."
"You don't know that, but I'll promise you this, in Spike's memory, while I'll make you my childe, unless you ask me, I won't claim you."
That startled her and she stared down at their linked hands. "But, sires and childer and sex..."
"Go hand in hand, I know." Leaning forward, he cupped her chin and lifted her face back to his. "He hated when I touched you."
Swallowing against unwanted emotion, Willow tried to add a bit of levity to the conversation. "It's not because I'm old with sagging breasts and stretch marks?"
Snorting lightly, Angel reached down and scooped her onto his lap to rub her back as he'd seen Spike do a hundred times. "You're beautiful. You always were." He was amazed when she curled against him, and even more touched when she began to cry softly, her tears wetting his shoulder. They sat like that for a long time, two former enemies turned reluctant family members turned even more reluctant friends until Willow quieted and lifted her head to give him a solemn look.
"I have one thing to ask you, a promise I want from you."
"Rose still has to lose the child."
"It's not about Rose, and I'm not certain about that, but we have time on that. It's about me. It's about...what's coming." At his curious look, she took a deep breath and continued, "I've read the accounts. A half dozen women and one man committed suicide anywhere from one week to one month after the onset of the madness, either driven to it by that or the pain or a combination. Clayborne's wife died in screaming agony as her body finally just gave up because her husband wouldn't let her kill herself. I don't want to die like that and I don't want to kill myself and have my kids have to live with that." She took another deep breath. "Hopefully I'll retain enough sanity to ask you, but, if I don't, and the time comes that the pain doesn't end, or if I beg to be allowed to kill myself, I want you to do it for me."
"I want your word that you'll kill me, Angel."
End Chapter 10
A bit shorter than normal but it seemed a good and evil place to end this chapter. ;)
SERIES: TEAOW&S
AUTHOR:Laure Alexander
EMAIL: lara@sunflower.com
RATING: NC17 overall
SPOILERS: Set eighteen then twenty years in the future of the series. If you've never read any of TEAOW&S, you'll be confused.
SUMMARY: For twenty years, the five way bond between the vampires and humans has been strong, the Family has grown close and loving, everything has been right in a world with the Hellmouth closed...until something happens to threaten everything they've built together.
CONTENT:sex, violence overall; this chapter has a bit of language and that's about it...oh, and me being evil, but that's a given.
DISCLAIMER:I don't own Buffy and friends or Buffy the Vampire Slayer; they're owned by Joss Whedon and Fox, I assume. No copyright infringement intended so please don't sue.
Sitting in a chair, fingers steepled and legs stretched out in front of him, Angel watched his lover sleep. She was restless, turning again and again beneath the sheet, and he wondered if her dreams were prophetic.
Buffy hadn't had a prophetic dream in nearly two decades.
They could use a prophecy about now.
Buffy was having a problem with his decision to turn Willow.
Far into the morning they'd talked and argued and even come to blows, but had resolved nothing. In the end, their anger and frustration had turned to passion and finally to grief, and he'd held her while she cried for Spike and Willow. Finally she'd slipped into sleep and he'd left their bed to seek out Drusilla.
Unfortunately his daughter wasn't making any sense and the blackened emerald--her constant companion--was burning a pattern into her palm which left her even more confused. When Angel had tried to take it from her, she'd thrown a screaming fit, and he'd given up.
A phone call to the hospital had told him that Willow was doing fine and would be released that evening if her condition remained unchanged. Another phone call to Giles had informed him that Rose was spending the day at the hospital with her mother and her siblings and grandparents were on their way back to town to be told about Spike's death. Giles had actually sounded sorry about their loss, but Angel figured it was more concern for Willow than caring for any of the vampires. He'd gotten used to the Watcher's quiet dislike over the last two decades and it didn't bother him. He didn't like the human either.
Finally he'd made one more phone call, one that went unanswered, and, a part of him was relieved.
Because if Conor had answered, he wasn't certain he wouldn't threaten to kill the boy.
Rationally he knew his son had no reason to believe a bullet wouldn't do more than knock down a vampire. No one had ever told the children about the damage to Spike's heart or the reason Spike needed not only Willow's blood but his own on a regular basis. Conor hadn't known. Angel couldn't blame him.
Angelus, on the other hand, could, did, and wanted the boy bleeding at his feet.
For the last five hours he'd sat in this chair, unable to sleep, brooding as he hadn't since he'd had his damn soul, waiting for Buffy to wake up. He missed Spike. He missed his son. He was facing a bloody fight over Willow.
And the Hellmouth could open at any minute and swallow them whole.
Twenty years of peace and happiness weren't enough. He wanted more.
He wanted Spike back.
*****
Alone at last, Willow rested her weary head against the pillows and closed her eyes. Her parents were taking Derek and Thea home with them to stay for a few more days until things calmed down at the mansion.
Her parents had been stoic, naturally, comforting the children as she told them all in halting words about Spike's death. While they'd liked their son-in-law, the fact he was a vampire had never been something they'd ever really understood. They'd been content to know he loved their daughter and their grandchildren and never really thought about the details. Willow had to explain about the pre-existing damage to his heart, and that had led to the reason he drank her blood.
Again, her family knew that--the scars were unmistakable--but they'd never given it any thought.
Her explanation of the bond, though, had finally broken her parents. It had taken an hour of crying and talking for them to regain enough control to comfort their grandchildren. While she'd joined in the crying, Willow had kept a close eye on Rose who had sat beside her quietly through the whole discussion, only reaching out once to squeeze Thea's hand as the younger girl had sobbed over her daddy's death.
At the news that Willow would soon follow him to the grave, Rose had gone white and still and hadn't made a sound.
Willow knew that the girl was in shock not only because she was losing her mother but because she was being elevated to the Five.
And she wasn't ready.
*****
As she headed for Willow's room, Buffy saw Rose in the waiting room and gave her a quizzical look. "Honey, your mom thinks you're with your grandparents and brother and sister."
"I couldn't leave her." Standing, Rose arched her stiff back and joined the older woman. "She told us...everything."
"Yeah, she told me when I called. I'm so sorry, Rose."
"It's just...one more unreal thing, you know? I can't believe it. I can't believe they never told us."
"We never..." Buffy sighed softly. "We thought we had time, decades, and that we'd lose Willow first to old age."
"I tried to call Conor a couple dozen times but my fingers froze. I can't tell him this over the phone. I'm just so afraid he'll blame himself for this, too."
Knowing her son, he would, but Buffy only took the girl's hand and led her to her mother's hospital room.
Willow was dressed and brushing her hair. An orderly followed them in with a wheelchair. "Rose?"
"I couldn't leave you."
"Okay. We can drop you off at grandma and grandpa's."
"No, I'm not going there. They have their hands full with Derek and Thea."
"Then Giles and Jenny's."
Rose shook her head. "I'm going home with you."
"Um, Will, I'm taking you to Giles' place unless you want to go to your parents'," Buffy said, frowning.
"I'm going home, Buffy." She levered herself into the wheelchair and they all left the room.
"Not a good idea."
"It's my home, but, no, Rose, I want you to go back to Giles'."
"No."
All three women frowned at each other, but couldn't go into more detailed arguments in front of the orderly.
Once they were in the car, Buffy turned to Willow and shrugged. "So, where?"
"Giles."
"No, mom, I'm serious. I want to spend all the time we have left with you."
Buffy gave her a concerned look before she started the engine. "I can't guarantee you won't be in danger."
"I can take care of myself, and if Angel is really determined to hurt me, he'll get to me wherever I stay."
"He can't get into either of those other houses."
"He can lure me out with threats. Look, I've given this a lot of thought and I'm going home with mom."
"Jeez, she's as stubborn as you, Will."
Willow sighed.
*****
It was evening and the Family was awake, fed, and restless. Buffy started to help Willow up to her rooms but she stopped her with a shake of her head.
"I need to talk to Angel."
"Also, not a good idea, Will."
"Buffy, please. Could you have him join me in the living room?"
"If you're insistent on talking to him, why not after I get you settled in bed?"
"In the hopes he'll have gone out to hunt for the rest of the night?" A ghost of a smile crossed Willow's face and she shook her head. "He won't hurt me and I have to talk to him."
Nodding in resignation, Buffy headed up the stairs.
Angel was seated at his desk signing checks but he glanced up when Buffy entered. "She came home."
"She wants to talk to you downstairs." Crossing her arms over her chest, Buffy gave him a belligerent look.
"Are you going to interfere?" he asked as he rose to his feet, the menace beginning to fall over him as he walked towards her.
"Will it do any good?"
"No."
Buffy looked away from him, trying to ignore the pain in her heart. "Rose is home, too. Stay the fuck away from her."
The hand wrapping in her hair to yank back her head, made her wince, but then he kissed her with all the love he felt for her, and she melted into his arms.
*****
Angel found Willow standing in front of the fireplace, her eyes locked on the bowl Penn had used for Spike's remains.
"You can feel him in there, can't you."
Nodding, she turned to face him. He was only a few feet from her, but then moved to sit on his throne and she followed him to stand in front of him. "I assume Buffy told you I only have ten days before the thirty are up." At his nod, she continued, a serene if sorrowful look in her eyes and her hands clasped over the mound of her stomach. "That seventeenth century journal we found fifteen years ago showed us there's one way to prevent it or stop it once it's begun. I won't take that route, Angel."
His eyes narrowed and his response came in a growl, "I won't give you that choice."
"Yes, you will. I won't become a vampire."
"We're not going to lose you, too."
"You always were going to, Angel. I'm mortal. That's why I have children, to carry on for me. The bond will pass to Rose. She's still my successor. If something happens to her, it'll pass to one of her siblings. It's the way it is. None of us will live forever."
"It's too soon," he ground out, his hands wrapping around the arms of his throne. "Your death will do irreparable harm to the Family. I won't allow it."
"The Family will survive. It always does. The bond passed to Nick, just as it was meant to. You should take him as your second in command." At his look of near-guilt, she nearly smiled. " And you already have. Don't worry, I don't blame you. Spike wouldn't either."
Something broke on the vampire's face and she moved to sit on the stool in front of him and to one side. It used to bother her that it was the a submissive position but that had stopped a long time ago. "He wouldn't, Angel. He loved you and he knew you better than you know yourself. You need a strong second, especially now."
"I'm not betraying him, I know that," he said gruffly, "But, everything is just happening too fast. Ten days isn't long enough, Willow."
"It's what I have. I'll admit it, I'm scared, but not enough to let you or any of the others turn me. We have no way of knowing if I'll care at all for any of you. I won't risk the danger to my kids and, if I can't love them, I don't want them forced to see me alive but not."
"Aurelian childer love, it's our curse and a part of the prophecy."
"Yeah, but you all had so many years to grow into it. I'd be fresh and raw and evil and way too dangerous. I can't do that to my kids, or to Buffy, and, really, Angel, do you want me to be a vampire?"
Their eyes met for a long moment and then he slowly shook his head. "No, but I don't want you gone either."
It was a telling admission and she almost smiled, instead reaching out and taking one of his hands. "And in the end it's not what Spike wanted and you'll respect that, won't you."
Angel frowned but finally conceded. "I hate this, and, Willow, if you change your mind and ask me, I'll turn you in an instant."
"I won't ask."
"You don't know that, but I'll promise you this, in Spike's memory, while I'll make you my childe, unless you ask me, I won't claim you."
That startled her and she stared down at their linked hands. "But, sires and childer and sex..."
"Go hand in hand, I know." Leaning forward, he cupped her chin and lifted her face back to his. "He hated when I touched you."
Swallowing against unwanted emotion, Willow tried to add a bit of levity to the conversation. "It's not because I'm old with sagging breasts and stretch marks?"
Snorting lightly, Angel reached down and scooped her onto his lap to rub her back as he'd seen Spike do a hundred times. "You're beautiful. You always were." He was amazed when she curled against him, and even more touched when she began to cry softly, her tears wetting his shoulder. They sat like that for a long time, two former enemies turned reluctant family members turned even more reluctant friends until Willow quieted and lifted her head to give him a solemn look.
"I have one thing to ask you, a promise I want from you."
"Rose still has to lose the child."
"It's not about Rose, and I'm not certain about that, but we have time on that. It's about me. It's about...what's coming." At his curious look, she took a deep breath and continued, "I've read the accounts. A half dozen women and one man committed suicide anywhere from one week to one month after the onset of the madness, either driven to it by that or the pain or a combination. Clayborne's wife died in screaming agony as her body finally just gave up because her husband wouldn't let her kill herself. I don't want to die like that and I don't want to kill myself and have my kids have to live with that." She took another deep breath. "Hopefully I'll retain enough sanity to ask you, but, if I don't, and the time comes that the pain doesn't end, or if I beg to be allowed to kill myself, I want you to do it for me."
"I want your word that you'll kill me, Angel."
End Chapter 10
A bit shorter than normal but it seemed a good and evil place to end this chapter. ;)