Stuck
Ever since I left the Hospital I havent been able to do anything. All I can do is sit on the couch in front of the computer and Im sick of it. Im getting extremely depressed. What if Im going to be this way for a really long time? Its ony been 5 days and Im already going insane! I want to be able to move around and breathe.
I got up today and changed the trash in the kitchen and in the bathroom and was done for. I was exhausted. Im sitting here in a filthy house and the only one doing anything is Tony who does the dishes every night. It takes more than that! The whole house is trashed...Rochelle hasnt done a god damned thing except contribute to the trash and mess and invite 50 people over every night who also trash the house.....She hasnt bought groceries and weve been out for a week..... I want to get up and clean it all but I cant!
This stupid medicine the Doctor prescribed me scares the shit out of me because it says it is going to make me feel shittier than I already do.....And I have to be on it for the rest of my life unless it doesnt work. Then theres one more med they can try and after that its surgery. But this med has so many scary effects..... And it says if I stop taking it I could have a have a heart attack.... Im in a lose lose situation....Either I take it and risk my life and feel like shit and never be able to do anything or I dont take it and feel like shit and not be able to do anything and lead a life not much worth living...
I really dont know what to do.... I keep wanting to cry but I hold it back. Its putting me in a horrible mood and Im getting irritated so easily.... I guess all I can do for now is ask "Why me?" As if I didnt have enough problems as it is I have to have more.
I got up today and changed the trash in the kitchen and in the bathroom and was done for. I was exhausted. Im sitting here in a filthy house and the only one doing anything is Tony who does the dishes every night. It takes more than that! The whole house is trashed...Rochelle hasnt done a god damned thing except contribute to the trash and mess and invite 50 people over every night who also trash the house.....She hasnt bought groceries and weve been out for a week..... I want to get up and clean it all but I cant!
This stupid medicine the Doctor prescribed me scares the shit out of me because it says it is going to make me feel shittier than I already do.....And I have to be on it for the rest of my life unless it doesnt work. Then theres one more med they can try and after that its surgery. But this med has so many scary effects..... And it says if I stop taking it I could have a have a heart attack.... Im in a lose lose situation....Either I take it and risk my life and feel like shit and never be able to do anything or I dont take it and feel like shit and not be able to do anything and lead a life not much worth living...
I really dont know what to do.... I keep wanting to cry but I hold it back. Its putting me in a horrible mood and Im getting irritated so easily.... I guess all I can do for now is ask "Why me?" As if I didnt have enough problems as it is I have to have more.