The Tale of the Crazy Client
Well, this one has been building for a while...
About two months ago, I stayed at work while everyone else went home sine it was a very dead night because of the weather - super frigid and crazy ass winds that were blowing so hard that the light posts were shaking like a good eighteen inches back and forth.
That meant, I got this crazy half hour client of one of my co-workers. This lady comes in with a huge bottle of water, will finish off a bottle before the massage starts, will want to drink more water DURING the massage and then, spend inordinate amounts of time in the bathroom before and after her massage.
She made her half hour appointment for 7:30 p.m., she showed up at 7:55 pm and was like, "I have to get to Whole Food before they close!"
Uhm, excuse me? WTF, woman? You've missed your WHOLE APPOINTMENT TIME and you're worried about getting to Whole Foods? Like you couldn't go before because it certainly wasn't like you were going to have to worry about your food thawing out because it was well below freezing.
So, I do her massage and then, have to hustle to get my other client, the 90 minute guy, going.
She comes in again a few weeks later and I get her again. This time, she lingers and linger and lingers out in the lobby. Like for a good HOUR after her massage, she's sitting in the lobby drinking her water, eating her "protein bar." (i.e. regular granola bar!)
She finally goes on her way and I don't see her again for a week or two.
Then, last week she's back! Wednesday night she shows up after 9 p.m. and is sitting in her car, watching all us therapists leave before she finally gets out of her car and goes in to harass the poor closing receptionist. Thursday night - lather, rinse repeat!
Friday night, she finally makes an appointment for 8:30 pm - she gets there a few minutes before and I take her into the room at 8:26 pm. I start her massage at 8:30 on the dot. I finish at 8:55 pm and then, hand her a water bottle as I walk her to the lobby door right about 9 pm, figuring she'll just head out now that she knows we're getting ready to leave. (We're open until 10, but if we don't have anything booked by 9, we pretty much all leave, except for the receptionists who are stuck there until 10.) No, oh no.... she heads to the hydroluxe room (think water bed with jets) and proceeded to spend close to an HOUR in there. Then, she finally comes out of the room and heads back to the bathroom where she proceeds to spend TEN MINUTES farting around back there.
As she's leaving, she turns around and says, "Oh, I'll be back Monday night...." that left the other therapist at the front desk, the receptionist and myself going, "Oh Gods, just get a LIFE, lady!"
We are massage therapists, we are not counselors. I get that you are lonely and depressed but lady, seriously - get more involved in the
community! Volunteer at the food bank, at the thrift stores, at a shelter - do something to get out more and quit stalking us!
About two months ago, I stayed at work while everyone else went home sine it was a very dead night because of the weather - super frigid and crazy ass winds that were blowing so hard that the light posts were shaking like a good eighteen inches back and forth.
That meant, I got this crazy half hour client of one of my co-workers. This lady comes in with a huge bottle of water, will finish off a bottle before the massage starts, will want to drink more water DURING the massage and then, spend inordinate amounts of time in the bathroom before and after her massage.
She made her half hour appointment for 7:30 p.m., she showed up at 7:55 pm and was like, "I have to get to Whole Food before they close!"
Uhm, excuse me? WTF, woman? You've missed your WHOLE APPOINTMENT TIME and you're worried about getting to Whole Foods? Like you couldn't go before because it certainly wasn't like you were going to have to worry about your food thawing out because it was well below freezing.
So, I do her massage and then, have to hustle to get my other client, the 90 minute guy, going.
She comes in again a few weeks later and I get her again. This time, she lingers and linger and lingers out in the lobby. Like for a good HOUR after her massage, she's sitting in the lobby drinking her water, eating her "protein bar." (i.e. regular granola bar!)
She finally goes on her way and I don't see her again for a week or two.
Then, last week she's back! Wednesday night she shows up after 9 p.m. and is sitting in her car, watching all us therapists leave before she finally gets out of her car and goes in to harass the poor closing receptionist. Thursday night - lather, rinse repeat!
Friday night, she finally makes an appointment for 8:30 pm - she gets there a few minutes before and I take her into the room at 8:26 pm. I start her massage at 8:30 on the dot. I finish at 8:55 pm and then, hand her a water bottle as I walk her to the lobby door right about 9 pm, figuring she'll just head out now that she knows we're getting ready to leave. (We're open until 10, but if we don't have anything booked by 9, we pretty much all leave, except for the receptionists who are stuck there until 10.) No, oh no.... she heads to the hydroluxe room (think water bed with jets) and proceeded to spend close to an HOUR in there. Then, she finally comes out of the room and heads back to the bathroom where she proceeds to spend TEN MINUTES farting around back there.
As she's leaving, she turns around and says, "Oh, I'll be back Monday night...." that left the other therapist at the front desk, the receptionist and myself going, "Oh Gods, just get a LIFE, lady!"
We are massage therapists, we are not counselors. I get that you are lonely and depressed but lady, seriously - get more involved in the
community! Volunteer at the food bank, at the thrift stores, at a shelter - do something to get out more and quit stalking us!