There are times when...
I'm in a satate of mind when I wish i had the strangth and currage to open up to my lover but after the things that have happend to me in my life it is so diffacult to trust any one even the guy i have known for so long i mean there are days when i feel comfortabul enough to share how i feel with him but there is always a part of him that is hidden somthing that im not sure if he feels comfortabul to share with me i mean he has always shared how he feels with me we talk about everything and we are natraly compatabul but we barly talk to eachother about us i mean i love him verry much and i have the highst respect for him but for some reasson i cant seem to share how i feel with him its hard for me to share what i want with him what i feel would be nice because im afrade of chasing him away though from what we have talked about it dosnt seem like he is leaving any time soon we have both shared that we want to know and be with eachother for a long time but there is still the fear i have from past experinces that keep me from sharing it that keep me from showing it from being as affectionate as i want to be with him i mean i do trust him more then any one in my life but i still cant seem to share all that i feel for him sigh i wish i could express with him what i want but it is a challenge i have been bilding up as much strangth as i can to try to talk to him but i never make the first move with any thing so it makes it verry difficult grr please some advice would help hugs and cuddles every one night night
~Countess~