Real Women? RARGH
Disclaimer: The following rant contains swearing, naive and idealistic wishes about the way the world should be, rage, and attempts to explore a whole host of issues, from one distinctly limited perspective. You have been warned. ;)
So, I watch the news, and they have a puff piece. The usual, an underwear thing, because hey, 'women like stories that are just about clothes', and men get to ogle boobs and bums.
Now, this one was for the fuller-figured ladies...essentially, all-covering garments to hold them into a different shape so their dresses look nicer. Okay. Whatever. But the description? The description is what gets me ANGRY. Underwear for "real women."
What. The. Fuck.
So, I'm suddenly not a real woman, just because I'm small? I am not a size 14 like the advertising woman, so I am what...a fake? Fuck you, Current Affair. Fuck you with a red-hot poker. I am a real woman. My mother is a real woman. Even my sister, with little in the way of curves...is a REAL WOMAN.
You know what? I have had it with fashion. I have had it with advertising, and with the shitty body image it gives everyone.
A woman is not lazy, or greedy, or ugly because she is over the average weight. Likewise, a woman is not 'a child', 'a boy', or somehow unfeminine if she is thinner than average. We are all real women, and we should gather together to frighten the crap out of anybody who dares say otherwise.
Then there is height. I am not a kid just because I'm short, and I do not wish to be patronised, dear sir, simply because you can see the top of my head while standing. And my taller friends? All those guys who jeered or wouldn't date you because you were their height or taller were jerks. They were assholes. Forget them. Anybody decent will just suck it up and fucking deal with the height difference without feeling as though you've emasculated them by growing more than they did.
And our colours, too. Nobody has the right to pay us out for those, or assume things about us based upon them. I should have the right to walk from one bus to another without some little fuckwit calling me 'ranga', and all of you whose ethnicities are much more discriminated against...I am angry that it is so, on your behalf, because you should not have to deal with that kind of crap. No-one should.
Same deal for sexuality. We are all people, and if the parties involved have given informed consent, then it is their own business, regardless of what genders the pairing, or trio, or other group involves...or none at all, if you're an asexual type, because that is cool too. Same deal with your kinks, or lack thereof in other cases. They're yours. That's all that needs to be said about them.
We should not be pressured to look nice for others, to perform our acts of being female so that others may approve of us. You know who the key person in your life is? It's you. Please yourself, and then maybe you will feel in a good state to help others. You can't pull someone from the river with a broken rope, so let's make time for ourselves, if only to stop all life's stresses fraying us away. It is not a bad thing to want 'me time'. You shouldn't have to be everything to everyone, all the time. And why should you care if that random person on the street thinks you should have worn makeup? It is your face, and your body. Clothe them, decorate them and deal with them in the way that's right for you, not what others tell you that you should be.
Our choices should be our own. I am childfree, and I should not be pressured to create children that I do not want. If you want kids, that should be your choice as well. Let's not look down on each other for those choices. The whole point of all those campaigns, was to earn us the right to choose for ourselves, whether you want to be a housewife, career woman, or a person who just sells woven baskets at the Sunday markets, or any other choice out of the countless ones that are out there.
Also? Sexism. It shouldn't even exist anymore, but it does, and we're going to have to keep standing against it. We should not have to be afraid. We should not have to worry that we'll wind up with lower paying jobs and not get promoted. These are things that should be seen, and should be fixed. Even if it's done bit by bit, perhaps we can smooth the way for someone else by treading that ground.
Oh, and please, whatever you do, do not go hating on the genderqueer. They, like you, are whoever they are, whatever they identify as. I refer to them as genderqueer because that's a term I encountered in some areas being used by representatives of these groups. Others use transgender, and the lines seem to be a bit blurry. But you get the idea. I've seen people dismiss them as 'not counting' for whatever they identify with, and that is very very wrong. Same as people from one point on the sexuality spectrum picking on somebody from another spot on it. Lesbian, Bi, straight, any other variations (and the male ones too, but this is primarily a rant about issues concerning women), can we please just get over whether we do or do not get our kicks from various interlocking parts? Think of the asexuals! They think of you... fully clothed. We all exist, so let's not go denying each other's orientations exist.
And you, whoever you are that is reading this. If you found it via flist, then we've probably friended each other, which means that I clearly see something cool in you. If you found it some other way, there's probably something cool about you too, even if I don't know you enough yet to say what it might be. But anyway, you are all beautiful people, damnit. Even if I have never seen your face, it is still as true as anything can be. You're you, so be you. Because you are a real woman (or a real something else, depending on who is reading this), and it should be your choice of who and what you want to be...right up there with acknowledging and supporting the rights of others to be who and what they want to be, too.
It's our choice. Choose it. Live it. Please?
It occurs to me that some of the things said here are probably pretty cliched. However, I assure you that they're no less sincere for that. I mean them.
So, I watch the news, and they have a puff piece. The usual, an underwear thing, because hey, 'women like stories that are just about clothes', and men get to ogle boobs and bums.
Now, this one was for the fuller-figured ladies...essentially, all-covering garments to hold them into a different shape so their dresses look nicer. Okay. Whatever. But the description? The description is what gets me ANGRY. Underwear for "real women."
What. The. Fuck.
So, I'm suddenly not a real woman, just because I'm small? I am not a size 14 like the advertising woman, so I am what...a fake? Fuck you, Current Affair. Fuck you with a red-hot poker. I am a real woman. My mother is a real woman. Even my sister, with little in the way of curves...is a REAL WOMAN.
You know what? I have had it with fashion. I have had it with advertising, and with the shitty body image it gives everyone.
A woman is not lazy, or greedy, or ugly because she is over the average weight. Likewise, a woman is not 'a child', 'a boy', or somehow unfeminine if she is thinner than average. We are all real women, and we should gather together to frighten the crap out of anybody who dares say otherwise.
Then there is height. I am not a kid just because I'm short, and I do not wish to be patronised, dear sir, simply because you can see the top of my head while standing. And my taller friends? All those guys who jeered or wouldn't date you because you were their height or taller were jerks. They were assholes. Forget them. Anybody decent will just suck it up and fucking deal with the height difference without feeling as though you've emasculated them by growing more than they did.
And our colours, too. Nobody has the right to pay us out for those, or assume things about us based upon them. I should have the right to walk from one bus to another without some little fuckwit calling me 'ranga', and all of you whose ethnicities are much more discriminated against...I am angry that it is so, on your behalf, because you should not have to deal with that kind of crap. No-one should.
Same deal for sexuality. We are all people, and if the parties involved have given informed consent, then it is their own business, regardless of what genders the pairing, or trio, or other group involves...or none at all, if you're an asexual type, because that is cool too. Same deal with your kinks, or lack thereof in other cases. They're yours. That's all that needs to be said about them.
We should not be pressured to look nice for others, to perform our acts of being female so that others may approve of us. You know who the key person in your life is? It's you. Please yourself, and then maybe you will feel in a good state to help others. You can't pull someone from the river with a broken rope, so let's make time for ourselves, if only to stop all life's stresses fraying us away. It is not a bad thing to want 'me time'. You shouldn't have to be everything to everyone, all the time. And why should you care if that random person on the street thinks you should have worn makeup? It is your face, and your body. Clothe them, decorate them and deal with them in the way that's right for you, not what others tell you that you should be.
Our choices should be our own. I am childfree, and I should not be pressured to create children that I do not want. If you want kids, that should be your choice as well. Let's not look down on each other for those choices. The whole point of all those campaigns, was to earn us the right to choose for ourselves, whether you want to be a housewife, career woman, or a person who just sells woven baskets at the Sunday markets, or any other choice out of the countless ones that are out there.
Also? Sexism. It shouldn't even exist anymore, but it does, and we're going to have to keep standing against it. We should not have to be afraid. We should not have to worry that we'll wind up with lower paying jobs and not get promoted. These are things that should be seen, and should be fixed. Even if it's done bit by bit, perhaps we can smooth the way for someone else by treading that ground.
Oh, and please, whatever you do, do not go hating on the genderqueer. They, like you, are whoever they are, whatever they identify as. I refer to them as genderqueer because that's a term I encountered in some areas being used by representatives of these groups. Others use transgender, and the lines seem to be a bit blurry. But you get the idea. I've seen people dismiss them as 'not counting' for whatever they identify with, and that is very very wrong. Same as people from one point on the sexuality spectrum picking on somebody from another spot on it. Lesbian, Bi, straight, any other variations (and the male ones too, but this is primarily a rant about issues concerning women), can we please just get over whether we do or do not get our kicks from various interlocking parts? Think of the asexuals! They think of you... fully clothed. We all exist, so let's not go denying each other's orientations exist.
And you, whoever you are that is reading this. If you found it via flist, then we've probably friended each other, which means that I clearly see something cool in you. If you found it some other way, there's probably something cool about you too, even if I don't know you enough yet to say what it might be. But anyway, you are all beautiful people, damnit. Even if I have never seen your face, it is still as true as anything can be. You're you, so be you. Because you are a real woman (or a real something else, depending on who is reading this), and it should be your choice of who and what you want to be...right up there with acknowledging and supporting the rights of others to be who and what they want to be, too.
It's our choice. Choose it. Live it. Please?
It occurs to me that some of the things said here are probably pretty cliched. However, I assure you that they're no less sincere for that. I mean them.