An opportunity taken or passed up...
I had found out about a non profit organization where they have princesses cheer up sick and needy children as well as the elderly. This sounds like a wonderful thing to try for, but I've hit a big problem.
They've asked why I want to do this, and I cannot think of a reason that DOESN'T sound selfish. And that's really not me. I guess I've not gotten into charity work of any kind that wasn't required by anything because there's been nothing I've wanted to do. This at least has things I'm good at. I have had a lot of my own problems to deal with, but none as what these people they're helping are going through. And also, I'm lonely. I've been looking for things I can do to meet people and NOT be overwhelmed right now. (I did not expect that trip to the movies to have THAT MANY PEOPLE...I hope the Ren Faire will be easier to handle...)
This could also be because I'm still hurt over some things that I'm still trying to get over. I initially intended to make a video of a scene from "Beauty and the Beast" because I feel that's the best way to get over this hurt that's been plaguing me for the past few years. I want to prove that I can play a lot of different roles, not just be typecast. I'm still relatively new to this and being shoved into the bad guy role constantly is not what I want. Sure, I LIKE doing it, but a lot of my favorite actors that excel at it don't always play the bad guy. :( That, and body image. I'm trying to get this under control because I do NOT want another bad audition like that. And with other things that have happened in the past few years, I've just gotten around to it now. That's just it. I'm dealing with so much that I don't want them to screw up the other things I've been trying to fix in my life. And depression isn't helping any.
So right now, I'm not sure if I'll just stick to this original plan or try to volunteer. I'm not sure if I'll do both. But if I do, I just want to find the right reason for volunteering.
EDIT-After giving it much thought, I am just going to pass on volunteering as I really do not think I can even find the right reason now. I always want to put my heart into what I do, and it just seems as good as it is, I just can't if it's not honest. I will still support what they are doing, even if I can't be a part of it. Right now, I have to do a lot for myself, but it doesn't mean I'm not willing to help others. I just need to find a way of doing so that is something I am completely honest about.
They've asked why I want to do this, and I cannot think of a reason that DOESN'T sound selfish. And that's really not me. I guess I've not gotten into charity work of any kind that wasn't required by anything because there's been nothing I've wanted to do. This at least has things I'm good at. I have had a lot of my own problems to deal with, but none as what these people they're helping are going through. And also, I'm lonely. I've been looking for things I can do to meet people and NOT be overwhelmed right now. (I did not expect that trip to the movies to have THAT MANY PEOPLE...I hope the Ren Faire will be easier to handle...)
This could also be because I'm still hurt over some things that I'm still trying to get over. I initially intended to make a video of a scene from "Beauty and the Beast" because I feel that's the best way to get over this hurt that's been plaguing me for the past few years. I want to prove that I can play a lot of different roles, not just be typecast. I'm still relatively new to this and being shoved into the bad guy role constantly is not what I want. Sure, I LIKE doing it, but a lot of my favorite actors that excel at it don't always play the bad guy. :( That, and body image. I'm trying to get this under control because I do NOT want another bad audition like that. And with other things that have happened in the past few years, I've just gotten around to it now. That's just it. I'm dealing with so much that I don't want them to screw up the other things I've been trying to fix in my life. And depression isn't helping any.
So right now, I'm not sure if I'll just stick to this original plan or try to volunteer. I'm not sure if I'll do both. But if I do, I just want to find the right reason for volunteering.
EDIT-After giving it much thought, I am just going to pass on volunteering as I really do not think I can even find the right reason now. I always want to put my heart into what I do, and it just seems as good as it is, I just can't if it's not honest. I will still support what they are doing, even if I can't be a part of it. Right now, I have to do a lot for myself, but it doesn't mean I'm not willing to help others. I just need to find a way of doing so that is something I am completely honest about.