I saw the sky in you, what do you see in me?
Today...
I'm dipping into a disastrous circumstance as of about 9:00 yesterday.
I love someone without being in love with someone.
There are a million reasons why this never should have started, but it did regardless. There are a million reasons it should have stopped since then, but it hasn't.
there are a couple of reasons why, last night, neither of us could sleep.
on opposite sides of the bed.
the scary part was that I think both of us noticed. We were fidgeting around, adjusting and readjusting for thirty minutes, and still neither of us could sleep.
We weren't in my territory or on my terms. I decided not to insist that you come closer, although i'm almost positive both of us wanted to be touching and both of us were too scared to admit it or do anything about it.
Then I looked over to you, and one of your eyes opened.
"I can't sleep."
"I can't either. I think I know how to fix this."
And I knew, as soon as I rolled over and found myself back on top of you, that neither of us would have trouble sleeping when i rolled back off and curled into your side, with your arm tucking me in.
I wanted to leave. I wanted to get up, get dressed, and walk back to my house while he was sleeping.
I wanted to tell him that I didn't want him to move, but if he thought that was best, that it was no business of mine.
I wanted to asked him if he liked it...to ask him if he was happier then than when she was home, pestering him and making him feel like shit.
I wanted to tell him that I care about him, but that it didn't make him special because it's impossible for me to have any kind of relationship with someone without caring. If I can love almost everyone else I work with, there's no way I could keep myself from caring about him.
I wanted to tell him that he's worth caring about, because I don't think he hears that enough.
I wonder if anyone ever tells him that they love him. I wonder if I will before he's gone.
I'm dipping into a disastrous circumstance as of about 9:00 yesterday.
I love someone without being in love with someone.
There are a million reasons why this never should have started, but it did regardless. There are a million reasons it should have stopped since then, but it hasn't.
there are a couple of reasons why, last night, neither of us could sleep.
on opposite sides of the bed.
the scary part was that I think both of us noticed. We were fidgeting around, adjusting and readjusting for thirty minutes, and still neither of us could sleep.
We weren't in my territory or on my terms. I decided not to insist that you come closer, although i'm almost positive both of us wanted to be touching and both of us were too scared to admit it or do anything about it.
Then I looked over to you, and one of your eyes opened.
"I can't sleep."
"I can't either. I think I know how to fix this."
And I knew, as soon as I rolled over and found myself back on top of you, that neither of us would have trouble sleeping when i rolled back off and curled into your side, with your arm tucking me in.
I wanted to leave. I wanted to get up, get dressed, and walk back to my house while he was sleeping.
I wanted to tell him that I didn't want him to move, but if he thought that was best, that it was no business of mine.
I wanted to asked him if he liked it...to ask him if he was happier then than when she was home, pestering him and making him feel like shit.
I wanted to tell him that I care about him, but that it didn't make him special because it's impossible for me to have any kind of relationship with someone without caring. If I can love almost everyone else I work with, there's no way I could keep myself from caring about him.
I wanted to tell him that he's worth caring about, because I don't think he hears that enough.
I wonder if anyone ever tells him that they love him. I wonder if I will before he's gone.