apparently wine makes me wax philsophically
Home from Thanksgiving. It was wonderful.
Traveling home for Holidays makes me feel so grown up.
And restored. There's nothing better for my spirit than spending time in the place i grew up, surrounded by family. Finding remnants of all my old hopes and dreams. It's very inspiring to me.
While i was home i snooped (is it tech. snooping when its your room?) through all me old stuff from High School and earlier. It was just what i needed. I've felt so drained and defeated lately, but looking through all my old birthday cards, locker signs, notes, and just scraps of stuff i got this amazing feeling of love and happiness wash over me. It was amazing. And i thought...maybe i can do this :).
There's almost a mantra of things i tell myself, through bad days, horrible dance rehearsals where i feel so frustrated that its all i can do not to cry, late nights studying, times when i get so mad i wanna scream, and moments where i know if i sit down i'll never get up.
1. You Are Not the Audience. This came from one of my romance novels of all places, and the moment i read it i could not get it out of my head. It helps remind me that I am the lead in my life and to do what makes me happy, not what others tell me will make me happy.
2.Defy Gravity. Oh Wicked. If i could play any song so loud that my eardrums almost burst it would be this one. I have this written in huge green letters on my mirror so that i see it every day. Reminds me to reach for the stars.
3. Now is Real. The other day in yoga class my teacher was basically saying this: The past no longer exists, the future may never exist. The only real thing in life is this moment. now. now. now. And as humans we never live in the now. We relive the past, plan the future, and never even notice now. I had never really thought about that before, i mean, really thought about it. After any horrible disaster or tragedy, it's easy to realize how fragile life is and how you have to live each moment as your last. Whats hard is actually doing it. And my teacher explained that it's hard because in this moment, now, your brain can only observe. it can't plan or review. You have no control.....and somehow, i like that thought. Now, that in no way excuses laziness or unpreparedness. Its just a nudge to stop everything for a moment, and let go of your control. Try it, its good for you :).
4. I Am Loved. Cause i am, by all sorts of people. It helps me when i feel worthless.
5. YOU Are the Only One Who Can Bring Happiness or Unhappiness to Your Life.Another Yoga lesson, one that i'm finding to be very true.
Traveling home for Holidays makes me feel so grown up.
And restored. There's nothing better for my spirit than spending time in the place i grew up, surrounded by family. Finding remnants of all my old hopes and dreams. It's very inspiring to me.
While i was home i snooped (is it tech. snooping when its your room?) through all me old stuff from High School and earlier. It was just what i needed. I've felt so drained and defeated lately, but looking through all my old birthday cards, locker signs, notes, and just scraps of stuff i got this amazing feeling of love and happiness wash over me. It was amazing. And i thought...maybe i can do this :).
There's almost a mantra of things i tell myself, through bad days, horrible dance rehearsals where i feel so frustrated that its all i can do not to cry, late nights studying, times when i get so mad i wanna scream, and moments where i know if i sit down i'll never get up.
1. You Are Not the Audience. This came from one of my romance novels of all places, and the moment i read it i could not get it out of my head. It helps remind me that I am the lead in my life and to do what makes me happy, not what others tell me will make me happy.
2.Defy Gravity. Oh Wicked. If i could play any song so loud that my eardrums almost burst it would be this one. I have this written in huge green letters on my mirror so that i see it every day. Reminds me to reach for the stars.
3. Now is Real. The other day in yoga class my teacher was basically saying this: The past no longer exists, the future may never exist. The only real thing in life is this moment. now. now. now. And as humans we never live in the now. We relive the past, plan the future, and never even notice now. I had never really thought about that before, i mean, really thought about it. After any horrible disaster or tragedy, it's easy to realize how fragile life is and how you have to live each moment as your last. Whats hard is actually doing it. And my teacher explained that it's hard because in this moment, now, your brain can only observe. it can't plan or review. You have no control.....and somehow, i like that thought. Now, that in no way excuses laziness or unpreparedness. Its just a nudge to stop everything for a moment, and let go of your control. Try it, its good for you :).
4. I Am Loved. Cause i am, by all sorts of people. It helps me when i feel worthless.
5. YOU Are the Only One Who Can Bring Happiness or Unhappiness to Your Life.Another Yoga lesson, one that i'm finding to be very true.